I amwondering what to do with my child's education.
First a little rant on the school's dealings with covid-19.
I asked to keep my child at home as my husband is at risk at the height of the pandemic (limited lung capacity and other illnesses, most likely will die or suffer permanent damage if infected) but the school head teacher threatened to dish out 'unauthorised absence' if I dared. Once we all developed slight fever and a minor cough as a family, then the school allowed the child to go home to self isolate, as per government guideline. Thankfully it wasn't Covid-19. I am ever so slightly resentful that I have so little power to protect my child against such an obvious danger even having explained that I will not demand for fee refund or anything. No home support was given to my child whilst other children who had to self isolate due to symptoms were given support. I felt it was a petty revenge from the head teacher's. I took it rather personally.
The school had a few weeks of chaotic (or none existent) online teaching before the break, but had successfully adjusted and delivered well since. However, I have noticed a fundamental difference between my child and the rest that makes me want to pull my child out of this private school entirely.
It appears my child is unable to keep up with his peers. Every child seem to have such ease and fun with the activities, yet we are spending hours and hours trying to go through the fundamental basics of Maths and English. The essential/basic level of maths is very easy. Having politely (sneakily) asked other mothers, it appears 8/10 child is on advanced stage, equivalent to year 2 and above in maths. My child is just about managing simple year 2 level maths but is still not officially being put on advanced level like every other child.
His English is terrible in comparison, very average for his years. He struggles with his grammar and cannot write a 50 word essay/text on Columbus or the pirates. Some days he cannot even write a single sentence down whilst his peers are writing daily diaries and their thoughts and opinions on world political affairs (slight exaggeration but not far fetched).
I still believe that my child is intelligent. If he were interested in a certain topic, he will spend hours figuring out the content, even reading age 7-9 books. On the flip side, if he decides the topic is boring he cannot even read through reception age books without skipping words and making fundamental mistakes.
My husband, who went to boarding school, is of the opinion that state school education is much better in the sense that state educated children are more well rounded and have better grasp of the real world. If our child were academically clever he would succeed in whichever academic setting. If he had other talents (sports, drama etc) he will develop that better in a state school as opposed to a highly academic school. Also, if we didn't have to pay for the tuition fee we could easily afford daily private tutoring sessions in whatever talent he may have. We are not a medic family and we do not have any concrete expectations. We want him to be a happy, confident and well rounded person who will have can enjoy life to the fullest with little stress.
I am torn. Should I pull him out and place him in the local state primary? A small village primary school 5 minutes drive as opposed to 45 min drive to the academic private school during rush hour. Or should I push him harder academically so he gains confidence amongst his classmates? I am worried that he will eventually begin to loath himself for not being able to keep up, always being the 'dumb one'. He is a bright child, in my opinion, who needs to be stimulated but I feel the school is focusing on the super talented 6 year olds who are reading 10 year old texts and doing year 3 maths and beyond. Which is understandable as these super bright children will most definitely achieve higher A level result and bring up the school average, hence attract more pupils and create higher revenue. The average child like mine will be the token child dragged along till the school decides to kick him to the kerb.
Should I just bite the bullet and pull him out now? Or should I push him so he could keep up with his talented cohorts? Or should I just wait, do nothing, and hope that he will pass the common entrance somehow? Will the school keep him till 10 years old, having had years of tuition fee, then decides he is 'unsuitable for the environment' and kick him out? As not many pupils transfers school during these years, I can see why the school would be keen to keep him until 'fresh blood' comes in.
I am rather emotional lately due to all the stress from the larger environment. I feel that I am no longer have any capacity for critical thinking.
Please help me get some clarity over this.
PS this school is obviously the most sought after school in our area. All other comparable schools are 1 hour to 1.5 hour drive away, some of which are boarding school which I am not keen.