Wycombe Abbey 2020

[Wycombe2020]

Hello, my daughter has an offer from Wycombe Abbey to go into Year 7 this year. She was really looking forward to tasting the school out a bit more at a sleepover, however, due to coronavirus, it was cancelled.
Is there anyone out there with daughters currently at Wycombe Abbey.
1.What do they think of the new Head?

1. Do Year 7 girls go home most weekends?
2. They can go home from Saturday afternoon until Sunday evening?
3. How religious is the school? During Chapel service do they pray to God, or talk about day-to-day issues?
4. How would you rate the teaching of foreign languages there? Currently my daughter’s French is almost non-existent, though her school taught it for some years.
5. How big is drama?l at this school? And how competitive is it to get main roles?
6. Is there a big number of Chinese pupils?
7. Do girls meet up in London or elsewhere during holidays?
8. How often are the girls permitted to use their mobile phones?

10. Do they have access to the internet through their mobiles?

Thank you,
Lily

My son is in a school with boarding albeit a small one. And I know members of staff in 4 boarding schools. A close friend is a member of the senior management team of a prominent girls boarding school in the South East. They don't have caps because "we don't see colour. Admissions are based on merit." This is obviously why in some schools which are essentially day schools with boarding, there are large overseas contingents because those are the pupils that want to board. Dulwich College boarders, for example, are almost all Chinese. Badminton's younger boarders also.

WA is mostly boarders.

We've just accepted the offer and deposit paid. Although we are fairly local, we opted for boarding as my perception is WA is designed as a boarding school and so as a day girl, there will be compromises. Each child is different, but our DD is full on and loved the idea of immersing fully in the school. At the open day, she walked out of junior house and said 'I'm boarding'. I don't think I have ever seen her so decisive.

I really appreciated the post on benefits of diversity and positive impact of overseas students. We're currently at a prep school with little diversity and it feels like a bubble - lovely for primary, but I'm excited by opening my DDs mind to the global world beyond the Home Counties while her views are flexible and biases yet to set.

Knowing a few of the families taking up places, I think the 2020 group will be a great cohort and I hope the cancelled sleep over doesn't put families off.

@honestchat, do you know if an informal gathering is being organised by parents. We are in the same position and will be interested in a meet up.

Hi, I know quite a lot about Wycombe so I might be able to help a bit.
1.What do they think of the new Head?
The new Head is quite good although very new so still getting used to it. She has changed the phone rule for girls in Year 8 who used to be allowed it during the day but now only have it after school.

1. Do Year 7 girls go home most weekends?

It really depends on the girl and parents. I currently have 2 dds, both at Wycombe who are in year 7 and year 10. Some girls love going home every weekend, mainly the ones who live nearby or in London, whilst others prefer to stay at school, often parents who are busy or overseas boarders. There are often activities and trips for the girls who stay in school on the weekend to attend. e.g. Thorpe Park or shopping or fun activities in the houses.

1. They can go home from Saturday afternoon until Sunday evening?

Yes, school is from 9:00 to 11:50 on Saturday and they can go home after that, unless they have lacrosse matches which will finish a bit later.

1. How religious is the school? During Chapel service do they pray to God, or talk about day-to-day issues?

There is chapel from Monday-Friday, with the exception of no chapel on Tuesday mornings. It only lasts for 10-15mins and normally focuses on a core value e.g. kindness. Teachers will talk about past experiences or you will be shown a short video clip. Every chapel service they sing a short hymn which is fun. There are prayers which last for a couple minutes but if you are non-religious you do not have to join in.

1. How would you rate the teaching of foreign languages there? Currently my daughter’s French is almost non-existent, though her school taught it for some years.

Honestly, I think it is excellent. My two daughters came knowing hardly any French and no other languages and have improved so much in Spanish and French. German is also offered, however none of my dds have chosen to take this.

1. How big is drama? at this school? And how competitive is it to get main roles?

Drama is loved by many girls and is definitely a nice way to take a brake from a busy day of school work. Many girls do private drama lessons with one or two of their friends. They can then choose to complete their Grade exams. Everyone does drama lessons as part of school from year 7 until year 9 and can they choose whether to continue for their GCSE. Drama is very popular.

1. Is there a big number of Chinese pupils?

The number of Chinese pupils has definitely decreased somewhat over the years, however there are quite a few. The nice thing about Wycombe is there are so many different nationalities and backgrounds and all the girls are so inclusive and make great friendships.

1. Do girls meet up in London or elsewhere during holidays?

I find that when the children are younger they meet up at each others houses. Some of the overseas boarders stay at girls houses over the weekend if they don't want to stay in school. London definitely is a main meeting point. When the girl get older, however, if they or their friends have holiday homes elsewhere, they may be invited to stay there for a some nights with their friends which is super fun.

1. How often are the girls permitted to use their mobile phones?

In year 7 they are allowed them for 1/2 hour each day after school, in which they usually call their parents. On weekends they are given them freely.

10. Do they have access to the internet through their mobiles? Yes, they do. There are also school computers located in the main school building for each year group to use for school work and entertainment as well as in the houses.

Hope this was helpful and its such a shame that the sleepover was cancelled!

cottoncandy123:
You may want to visit the school again during the school day as on a visit this year, most of the girls were carrying mobiles with them during the day and it was also a weekday, not a weekend.
When asked about phone usage, the response we got was that the phones can help with school work during free time/breaks and that they allow the kids (not just Year 13) to manage phone usage themselves

We didn't feel that reassured about girls wondering about the town either....all they need to do is exit the school with an older child or teacher and then they are given a time to return to a meeting point in the town from where they were "released". Older girls are allowed to leave in groups of three whenever they have free time

There's no tracking of what girls eat either so potential for eating disorders to take hold (more prevalent in girls at this age than boys so we were shocked by this)

Simply sharing our observations

There was a high number of Chinese students and we were not looking for this level of ANY one particular race, rather a more balanced mix (perhaps something that reflects the diversity of Britain).
We also reviewed the leavers board which illustrated pictures of those girls leaving and were shocked at the change in demographics over the years. There is nothing wrong with this (if that’s what the parent is seeking) so long as WA share this information but sadly it's not shared anywhere. If WA believe this is the right thing to do, then it should be celebrated and shared

All parents want to make fully informed decisions and some are looking for true international diversity (meaning a mix of nationalities rather than 1 overriding overseas set which we observed largely sitting amongst themselves which in turn removes any advantages that might have been – the assumption here is that you need to integrate to share your culture - we especially need this advantage post Brexit but due to the modus operandi, we won't get much of it) and some are looking for more of a traditional mix of largely British students (white or non-white……yes, there are non-white British like ourselves in the UK)

The choice is personal and no one should be victimised for wanting to make this choice or for wanting to view this information.
Sadly, this information is not shared by WA on their literature/website and most folks feel almost criminal for asking for this info - surely that can't be right as we cannot make a fully informed decision for our child this way

Great results and University offers although, we were looking for a bit more

Hello everyone. I’ve been lurking for a while and thought to add my little piece!

Sadly my daughter didn’t get in but I would like to say a huge congratulations to those whose daughters did.

One of my daughter’s best friends is currently in year 7 and she loves every minute of her time there. We have family in year 9 and year 12, and these girls have grown to be amazing young women.

One started very shy and timid, and it’s wonderful to see her very confident and articulate.

Regarding the phone use, I know for a fact that in year 7, they’re only allowed 30 minutes during the week, and longer on the weekend. They’re not allowed social media, including WhatsApp.

Of course it’ll be more freely in the older years as the girls have to learn to self regulate. And from what I gather, they’re very sensible about it.

Going into Town - day students in any school at age 15/16 will be doing to the movies or shopping on their own. So in boarding schools, they allow them go out however for very short periods of time. They have to say where they’re going and they’re given a time within which they need to be back. And this is on certain days. Not every day.

My son is in year 11 in a boarding school and the same applies to him. So it’s not exclusive to WA to allow older girls go out on their own.

Regarding Chinese students, I wonder why it matters and why WA needs to point it out to parents. Does any school point out to prospective parents that there is a high number of white British kids?

My daughter’s other best friend is Chinese and they were both hoping to get into WA together this year. I remember my daughter praying there won’t be many Chinese girls there simply because she was scared of loosing her friend to them once they get in!!!

I remember on the day of the assessment, we were both looking round for the Chinese girls and there weren’t many!

I like schools with chinese girls because they generally have amazing work ethics and discipline which the other girls can learn from.

From what we have seen and heard from and about WA, the girls are happy, strong, independent women who are extremely compassionate and supportive of one another.

Apparently they have this almighty maths test in December of year 7 that determines what ability group they are placed so it’s a big deal for the girls. Of course most of them got scores in the nineties. But a girl got 50 something. My friend’s daughter said the rest of them gave her cuddles and a few girls helped her with the correction and taught her the areas she’s struggling with. This sort of attitude is not uncommon from what I hear. The girls are only competitive with other schools - together they want to be at the top of the league table but they’re not competitive with themselves.

To be honest, I’ve noticed that most of the people that have negative comments about WA are not parents of the school. They’re either people that have just heard about it or their kids haven’t got in.
I am yet to hear from a parent with girls in there that has said something negative about it.

So for all whose daughters are starting in September, a huge well done to them. You should be proud. They will grow up to be amazing young women. They are truly in for an exciting and rewarding 7 years ahead.

Google cloister house or butler house blog.... even I wish I was 11 and going to Wycombe abbey!!!! I think the blogs are written by the girls and they talk about the amazing time they have and what they’re up to. You’ll be assured they’re truly happy

Mumddmum:
Thanks for sharing your experience.
Your statement illustrates my point entirely:.......

"My daughter’s other best friend is Chinese and they were both hoping to get into WA together this year. I remember my daughter praying there won’t be many Chinese girls there simply because she was scared of loosing her friend to them once they get in!!! "

I am from an ethnic background myself and information on ethnicity helps some parents of this background to make a decision on how diverse (or not) the school is.
It shouldn't matter and maybe in 100years it won't but in 2020, I can tell you from experience of coming from an ethnic background, it matters.

Thanks for sharing your experience, I hope my info helps you understand this from my viewpoint.

My daughter isn’t Chinese - her best friend is. She, in her 10 year old mind just wanted her friend to herself and thought her friend might not hang out with her anymore if there were other Chinese girls - I wouldn’t take a 10 year olds perception of ethnicity and it’s effect very seriously. Besides like I said on the assessment day, we found there weren’t so many Chinese girls - whatever that even means!!!

I have not seen or heard of any schools that publish details of ethnic backgrounds. And I don’t think there’s any reason to. It really doesn’t matter.

I have looked through the blogs I mentioned above and I did not notice a large number of any ethnic group in particular. The predominant ethnic group is white British which is understandable but there seems to be a wide range of others. I could see a good number of Africans as well.

Kids do not see race or ethnicity- just like my daughter and her Chinese best friend.

Now that my daughter is going to a different school, she’s hoping there’ll be lots of Japanese girls so she can visit Japan!

Cottoncandy currently has daughters in the school and she affirmed that there’s a good ethnic mix.

Like I said before, for parents whose girls are starting in September, I will go with the opinion of someone who is currently there.

My own opinion or any outsider’s is from what we have heard or seen on one or two visits, and can never be compared with someone who is actually experiencing the school - cottoncandy has girls in year 7 and year 10, I can bet if she found issues with the school with her first, she definitely won’t have put her second in the school as well.

I’ve heard of families with 3 kids all in WA, that’s a testament to the good experience they have there.

If I had my way, my daughter will be starting there in September, but unfortunately it didn’t work out this time. Maybe we’ll try again at 13+, but please be reassured that you have made the best decision you could have for your little girl. I am yet to hear of one person that has regretted it

Thanks for sharing your opinion Mumddmum.
Best wishes to you and all others at a testing time like this
God bless

Usually the opposite, when Chinese parents choose English schools, they want the least number of Chinese students possible...with a name Lily, I assume OP is one of them:)

Hello...I am a dad...working with my daughter to prepare her for WA. I know this is mumsnet...so please excuse if I am not allowed here, or if it is inappropriate... but I'd really appreciate if some of you could help.
I just want to know how should one prepare for the assessment day at WA. My daughter is a (very) good student, close to the top of her class, not super in sports but enthusiastic and participative, and quite active generally. Some tips on preparation would be really helpful...she write Bonds papers (10-11, and starting on 11-12).
Um...also, please note, we are not in the UK, but she reads British curriculum. Her assessments are in Oct 2020...
Also, any general tips on what happens during assessments, and do's and don'ts...that would really help
Thank you all in advance, and once again, apologies if dad's are not allowed here

Surely you asked all these questions before paying your deposit? This is ridiculous and feels like someone just trying to get an idea of life in a private or boarding school. Unbelievable.

going to get flamed, but have to ask - do WA really call a boarding taster a 'sleepover?' How odd.

Planning my DD secondary school, we live reasonably close to WA and we want to send our daughter to a academically good and with a good pastoral care preferably day school. DD is academically bright, enjoys sports and music but sensitive and emotional. She is currently in a Prep school in Bucks and we feel it will be great for her to be at WA. However we are worried as we don't want to be Elitist we want a her to have a rounded education. Any suggestion?

What do the Prep school recommend for her? Which year is she in?

SeafrontBingo,
DD is in year 3, I know its early but I am forward thinking to decide if we need to move closer to London day schools or not, if WA is not where she goes then probably we have to move towards London. Schools says she is academically very bright.

@MitHolmes WA is primarily a boarding school. They have a handful of day girls, all of whom integrate properly into the day to day life of the school, but I honestly feel your daughter would miss out if she didn’t board.

It was recommended by our prep head for DD1. We loved it when we visited but school was very full on including Saturday morning school and Saturday sport. DD could have been a day girl or boarder so we went in there looking at both aspects. In the end we decided that whatever way you went there, it just intruded too much into family life so didn’t apply.

You also describe her as sensitive and emotional. That’s not a WA girl at all. Whilst they are a wonderful mix of personalities, they are all confident in their abilities (even if only quietly) and push themselves to achieve. It’s hard to explain. A WA girl is many things but sensitive and emotional aren’t on the list.

I think many parents get so caught up in getting their children into the “best” schools that they don’t always look for the “right” school. Based on your brief description of your daughter I would say Heathfield might be a better fit. Much smaller school and a minibus route (including from Gerrard’s Cross if you live that way) if you wanted her to be a day girl. Berkhamsted also has a wide transportation network. She may well find it better being a big fish in a small pond. We are considering Heathfield for DD2 as whilst cleverer than her sister, I am not sure the school DD1 goes to is quite right for her. We have a few years yet though and things might change but I want to keep all options open for her.

I guess what I am saying is look at all options, not just the super academic schools offered in London. You also have some amazing girls grammars in Bucks (assuming that’s where you are) and there’s also some great schools just north in Oxfordshire like Headington, Oxford High and St Helen & St Katherines . We moved out of London to avoid the madness of secondary school entry. It’s honestly bonkers and unbelievably stressful having watched many of my friends go through it.

Good Luck!!

@Zodlebud, spot on.

@MitHolmes re: 'elitist';, you are venturing into that territory with any London independent etc or boarding school, or even, some may say Grammar. As Zodlebud says choose the right not the 'best' school.

I would want my DD to be a full boarder at WA to get the most from the experience. The USP of WA is that nearly all get a full house of 9s at GCSE etc, you are guaranteeing the academic results effectively.

Whilst a very bright girl will do very well at other, less academic, schools that may be more suitable my experience is they may not be pushed to get the very top grades across the board. Not a disaster by any means and depends on what your priorities are.

St Mary's Ascot is also a very good school with a great reputation for getting amazing results from a more mixed ability cohort, nurturing and fun too. It's Catholic but not all the girls are. You can be a day girl there too. I'd probably choose that ahead of a London day.

Have a look around all the schools and don't rule out boarding.

@Wycombe2020. Hi, has your daughter settled in The Wycombe Abbey? How is the school?

@Honestchat. Hi, please can I have some advice about the Wycombe Abbey School? Has your daughter got settled? Does she like the school? Is it hard for her to board at the school?

I will say from personal experience that its a lovely school. Boarding is definitely not an easy option but the staff are all lovely and help the girls settle in nicely. Going back after CoVID will definitely pose it’s own challenges but it will all get quietened again.
Absolutely happy with our choice so far.

We’ve been really happy with WA both when the girls were onsite and during online learning this term. No doubt the entire experience boarding through COVID has been different to normal, but the overall school and academic experience has still been exceptional. The school is vastly experienced in helping the girls settle into their new environment and the realities of boarding. Our DD had a couple of wobbles in the first couple of weeks - missing home vs being unhappy at school though. She settled and the school were very understanding and supportive throughout

@ Iconmum.@Honestchat. Thank you for the advice. My DD got the offer for 2021. Never leave me before. So worried about boarding. DD also got the offer from St Paul’s girls school. It’s so hard to make decision on both schools.

@daughtertoWycombeabbey If you or your daughter are not OK with boarding then please don’t do it. It can be a miserable experience if it’s not right for your family.

WA is very full on with boarding too even with the introduction of open weekends. So full on that we decided it wasn’t for us because it just didn’t fit with family life. We all loved WA and were committed to boarding but in the end opted for another school without Saturday morning school where DD can weekly board.

Just because a school has a fabulous reputation doesn’t mean it’s the right place for your daughter - boarding is a big commitment.