Will being 'poor' make you stick out like a sore thumb at Oxford?

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Is the prestige of going there and the desire to study that particular course, enough to offset a 'poor' background?

Help! Dc applying for uni. Has great grades but worried not being rich is going to impact friendships, socialisation, etc!

No it absolutely does not. I'm a current student at Oxford, my family are fairly well off but I'm certainly not "rich" (ie loan covers accommodation, parents bought laptop but all my money for food etc comes from working over the summer).
Honestly, please, please, don't let any worry about finances and "fitting in" stop him from applying. Oxford has a lot of free money available too, there are grants given automatically if you fall below a certain threshold on student finance, hardship grants, various scholarships. And accommodation costs are cheaper bc of the shorter terms + massively subsidised at most colleges. Plenty of free entertainment and social events too.
Socially, I have close friends who are everything from insanely rich to both parents unemployed, and it really doesn't matter at all (if anything the rich kid gets teased a little!). Nobody has ever commented on the fact I went to a state school and I have to watch where my money's going quite carefully. Everyone is much more interested in comparing subjects and having conversations ranging from politics and philosophy to the merits or otherwise of cheddar cheese.

Of course not. This isn't 1924 😂

Sorry that was a bit of an essay! I'm involved in access work with my college, and I'm determined that a student's background shouldn't put them off applying. What subject is your dc thinking of? I'm very willing to offer advice on here or on pm if they're worried about what it might be like etc

Marshmello - good point! It is something I and other students did worry about until we got here though, so I understand where op's dc is coming from on this one

Most people at Oxford are not "rich" certainly not Bullingdon club rich. But I would be careful to try to pick the right college.
Most people come from relatively middle class backgrounds, but Oxford is trying to widen participation both with the Foundation year and Opportunity Oxford - both of which aim to help those from less traditional backgrounds "fit in" at Oxford.
Oxford can also be a cheaper choice, as they can usually offer 3 (or 4) years of College accommodation, where you usually only have to pay rent for the time you are there. (And a richer college can offer travel grants and hardship funds.)

Please, please encourage your son to apply.

My son is currently in his second year at Oxford and we are a very low income family. I had the same reservations and concerns, but he has made loads of friends from all different backgrounds and no-one has ever treated him differently.

Oxford also offers a number of scholarships and help for those on lower incomes so that they are able to afford to join clubs, socialise and not feel any different to their friends.

Please make sure you go to the open days, talk to current students and tutors and I'm sure you will be reassured.

My son is having the time of his life and loving every minute.

Working class oxbridge graduate

I am so glad I went to Cambridge

Yes I did have some snooty comments made from some of my classmates that they deserved to be there more than I did !! Haha
How dare they

Met so many fab amazing people
It really is a life changing experience

Go for it

I would have thought it depends on the college to some extent. Dh came from fairly poor background and went to Cambridge. Went to fitzwilliam which is definitely the least posh end of things. Met people who I now know and are definitely not in the "posh" category. That said he said there were plenty of posh folk in other colleges esp Trinity.
Don't discourage Him but def research the different colleges as they will all have different feels

I think the feel of a college and chatting to current students on open days is probably more important than stressing about the percentage of posh people tbh. Also it helps to remember that just because someone's life looks perfect and privileged on paper, it doesn't mean they haven't had difficulties in life, family problems, coming out, mental and physical illness, all these are the same whatever your means

I think you find what you are looking for.

If a student expects it to be full of posh snobs, then they will find them, and focus on that and feel out of place.

If they expect it to be full of interesting people of all sorts of other backgrounds, then they will also find those. There are loads of nice people with plenty of diverse backgrounds, including some rich ones. The rich snobbish ones are there too, but they aren't the only ones.

I went to oxford around ten years ago from a very disadvantaged background, but also a background of a lot of domestic violence. I did stick out like a sore thumb.

It wasn’t “being poor” that was the problem. It was

• never having been abroad (made worse by the fact I was studying languages!)
• never having done any extra curriculars: I “lost” a lot of respect from people because I couldn’t play any instruments, had never done any sports except school PE. I basically had no achievements outside of academia and I was looked down on for that.

-I had no exposure to “classical” culture like opera, classical music, had never been to the theatre etc

• I didn’t have networking skills
• my parents didn’t believe in me

That being said, I still had a truly amazing time and would never regret my decision to go. Ten years later, I’m so proud of my accomplishments there.

Choose your college wisely and you'll be absolutely fine. I accidentally went to one of the most posh colleges and still was OK. One of my best friends, also at that college, was the first in his family to go to uni and the only person from his school that year to go to uni at all. There are lots of generous hardship grants available compared to other universities too so well worth considering!

Like with Cambridge you will find a lot of students from public school with a lot of family wealth, but that isn’t a problem unless you choose to make it one.

The only issue I found at Cambridge (and Oxford has similar rules), you’re essentially not allowed to work while studying, so that can hold you back due to not affording to fully take part in various societies etc.

My daughter went to Oxford and didn’t feel she fitted in too well. She was state grammar school educated and got free tuition and a grant because of the family’s low income.

SimonJT my daughter worked every weekend and holiday to fund herself through uni.

It’s one of the best universities to be poor at, because if you choose the right college they have a lot of funds and scholarships and help students out if they’re struggling financially. One of my friends paid nothing for her third year place in halls because her parents couldn’t afford it, the college just let her live rent free rather than drop out.

The social mix depends on the college to an extent. But there was a broad range even in my day (20 years ago) and it’s got much better since then.

Hi, may I please join in with a question as this seems to be an active thread. I really wonder about the living costs at Oxford University.
How much do you need above accommodation and prepaid meals (breakfast and dinner) per term, do you think?

I did my masters at Oxford and despite earning an excellent salary and working in a vip job / it being a masters so full of mature students. even I felt left out a bit. Oxford tends to attract a certain type of personality that’s so self-confident it’s almost arrogant (the type that’s coached and encouraged at private schools via debate clubs etc) and if you can’t be the same it does make things difficult. If you’re poor and introverted or not confident about your background (or have negative self-talk and so don’t feel you deserve to be there) I imagine it would be very difficult

I suspect he'll be fine. Not everyone at Oxford is rich, and the university is actively trying attract more children who aren't "rich."

If it makes you feel any better my own child goes to a very academic private school. They had an Oxbridge talk this week where the message seemed to be: we will expect a near perfect standard from you because you are privileged to go to this school, and we will accept other children with significantly lower grades than you because we want more state school pupils from power backgrounds.

Oxbridge is now making concerted efforts to make sure less economically advantaged children have places.

I’m a single parent and we’re poor. My daughter is going next year; she doesn’t give a monkey’s, to be honest - she says she’s as entitled as anyone else to be educated there, seeing as she’s been offered a place.

Look at it this way: the accommodation is cheap not just because of the shorter terms but because many colleges are very wealthy establishments and subsidise the costs. Likewise meals in college can be incredibly cheap.

You never need to buy a book, the libraries have enough copies or will get anything you need by the next day. College gym , wi/fi all free.

Go for it!

They had an Oxbridge talk this week where the message seemed to be: we will expect a near perfect standard from you because you are privileged to go to this school, and we will accept other children with significantly lower grades than you because we want more state school pupils from power backgrounds

Is that how it works? Competition is very strong, I thought they were interviewing more based on contextual offers. The state school Oxbridge students I know all got a minimum of AAA or A*AA for STEM.

I would say I stuck out like a sore thumb, but I did feel it sometimes. Like in the Xmas holidays when half the year seemed to be going skiing and I was going home to work at Next. Or when people made fun of me for drinking lambrini and called me a chav. Tutors didn’t understand that my state school hadn’t offered Latin or Greek and I was learning from scratch (I did classics)

However, I met some amazing people and made great friends with folks from a range of backgrounds. The opportunities are amazing and the financial support from colleges can actually be quite generous.

For some weird reason I get the impression that Cambridge has a higher proportion of students from lower income background than Oxford. Obviously there are still plenty of rich/posh students at Cambridge but not as many as Oxford.

I did go to Cambridge (a long time ago now) so I am biased and have no actual experience of Oxford

But maybe just look at the stats for numbers of state v private school educated students at each uni and each college.

PS there are generous grants for students from lower income backgrounds - at Cambridge at least, and i would hope Oxford offers the same - so in some ways there might be more financial support at Oxbridge than elsewhere. The cost of living is high though - higher rents than almost any other UK city apart from London. Of course college accommodation is often subsidised; the wealthier colleges can charge lower rents.