In Year admissions advice - complicated situation

[mamatravels]

Hi, advice sought ( I haven’t been on mumsnet for many years!!). Will try to give as much info upfront - so I don’t dripfeed.

We live in Kidbrooke (SE London), and my Year 8 son is attending a school (IAG) which is being closed at night he end of this academic year. His sister is in year 6 and has school applications - but they were submitted before the school closure was announced.

Due to my work we are relatively new to the area, my work is demanding long hours and I am a single mother ( all relevant to the scenario).

I have applied for the dedicated in year admissions process for our school to local state school ( ranging from outstanding to inadequate - ofsted not my opinion). For all we are sitting roughly between 13th-28th on the wait list ( no classes are being extended to accommodate the school closure locally).

In addition, I have applied to schools that incur fees (but not the local 11/13+ indies because I didn’t feelwe could turnaround that prep in 8 weeks).

We now have offers from the French school ( Wembley), Royal Alexandra and Alfred State boarding school and Holyport state boarding school.

Realistically, I will throw myself of a financial cliff if I attempt a fee paying day school in London. Stateboarding provides safety, consistency, access to more activities , good education and is financially possible but tough.

My son is reluctant to move again, and I am struggling to see the wood for the trees. Anyone got any experience of Royal Alexandra, Holyport or John Roan in Blackheath ? Very random question I know.

How do boarding fees at RAS and Holyport compare with day fees locally? Are they much lower?

They are equivalent, however if the kids go to boarding, I will move for to a smaller cheaper place further out of London, would not need after-school/ overnight childcare cover etc. So lower domestic costs on that front.

I have heard good things about Holyport. Wonderful facilities and the partnership with Eton College means they can access further world class facilities. Quite a few families from private preps are choosing it in preference to private boarding secondaries. Seems that you get much of what a private boarding school offers without “private school” label - so stands you in good stead when applying to universities. I would jump at the chance.

Thank you! Very good to know. Maybe some of this is my own anxiety about boarding!!

A single mother with very long working hours, a child in a London day prep (year 5) and constant financial and childcare concerns, I really feel your pain. I have also considered boarding school (in particular RAS as my daughter is mad about her horses and that seemed like the cheapest option). However, I have decided against boarding (unless she really asks for it) and have a live-in au pair, which I will hopefully be able to get rid of in year 6 when she can come back from school on her own.

I just thought it would seem like I'm sending my daughter away and that it's an "easy" solution to my problems whereas she's not a problem but rather my best friend. I know different people have different opinions about boarding schools and if your kids want to board (it will easier for them as they're together) then that's fine, but I would try to keep the family together and avoid sending them away.

Try the local state day schools (they will surely get a place at a school) and depending on how far it is, they will soon be old enough (arguably already are) to be left to their own devices and no childcare needed.

RAAS has a rather mixed boarding Ofsted report and a less than academic reputation.

XelaM sounds like you are describing my life. We still have an Aupair, but in reality the kids have outgrown this support model. I am still a bit worried about unsupervised afternoons and would need cover when I travel.

We will definitely get state school places - but it is highly likely they will get offered different schools. This was my plan A - the experience we have had with this local school folding, now makes me anxious.

Thank you all for your thoughts..,

We agonised about boarding but DC finally started at 11. Ten years on they all say they enjoyed it pretty much all of the time. Of course they had their ups and downs but so do children at day schools.
I think a boarding school offers a better setting than long periods at home alone waiting for working parent to get home. It does not suit every child but you are the best judge of your own children.
Boarding today is vastly different from boarding a generation ago so do not be put off by horror stories from the 1970s.

This is my thought. Just need to persuade my son !!!

Understandably, you seem to be panicking a bit? If your son is not on board with boarding then it wouldn't be a good fit surely? John Roan is going through some turbulent times but we know some families there and their children are doing well academically. It will settle down quickly I think. There is a new school - Leigh Academy at the Standard (but might just be Year 7 entry). There is also Thomas Tallis and Halle Academy local to Kidbrooke. Eltham College has occasional places (depending on your salary you may qualify for a bursary). Or Farringtons in Chislehurst (there's a school bus from the Standard)?

Forgot to say, there are many other schools in neighbouring Boroughs that are easily reached by train from Kidbrooke.

Unless your ds wants to board you will need to rule it out. Changing at 13 can be awkward enough, unless there is a regular intake then as with many private schools. Where are his friends likely to go?

Thanks LightSabre we have applications in with all of named schools bar Halle and Eltham College and Chislehurst, I am very unsure if we would get an offer to any except John Roan. We are on the door step of TT, Harris and Leigh and still 10 plus deep in the waitlist. I probably am panicking it’s been a rough few months. If I sent my son to John Roan and it was a poor experience I am not sure if I would forgive myself ( but you guess the same applies to boarding). My son was very taken by the John Roan presentation at his current school - so that is encouraging.

Friends will be scattered ( and are already scattering) . He is not anti boarding- he doesn’t want to move. Ironically, I suspect he would very much enjoy it.... but I are all a bit flattened at the he moment so decision making feels hard.

I'd give John Roan a go - you can always provide tutoring support and move to independent for sixth form if needed. Your ds will stay locally and still be able to see his friends and it's a very easy journey.

There is also Colfe's school which i'd forgotten to mention earlier!

Thank you for the advice and options LightSabre!!

@mamatravels did you end up going for Holyport college? Looking for any advice on the school as I’m considering it for a boarding place for my son.