school birthday party new friend fancy dress problem

[TurnAgainCat]

Ds aged 4 has been invited to the first birthday party this term of a child in his class in his new school. We are both keen to meet the other parents and make some new friends, however, a lot of them are older and more affluent than me, and I don't want ds to grow up thinking that we can spend as much money as some of them do, because we can't. The party is a fancy dress theme of Peter Pan. I thought ds could just dress up in any fancy dress, as Mum has given him a lovely firefighter's outfit which he has hardly had a chance to wear, and also has a lion costume and doctor's coat. But this morning one of the Dads was chatting to me and said they had gone to Hamleys but could not find a Peter Pan outfit and did I know where to buy one, and if the parents have stipulated Peter Pan then they thought we ought to comply. I said I was just going to send ds in nice fancy dress, because I don't have time to be making fancy outfits, and I can't afford to keep on buying them. Now I am fretting about it, and don't know what to do. Shall I make a silly pirate's costume for ds out of old scarves? It won't be as nice as his lovely firefighter's suit anyway. I really miss the old gang of Nursery parents and feel lonely.

... the silly dad ... maybe also the slightly thoughtless parents who've got carried away

realise it's not the point, but would you like to borrow ds's Peter Pan costume (from Woolworths NOT Hamleys)?

It's not as bad as you think - there's Red Indians, pirates, the children, lost boys etc etc. Pirate is dead easy and can be cobbled together with things you'd have in the house anyway (and your ds will be chuffed to bits with a cardboard sword I'm sure). Otherwise, ask some of your nursery friends if they have anything you could borrow. Sure, this dad was looking in Hamleys but meanwhile back in the real world, the vast majority of parents use a bit of imagination and sticky tape and the kids don't care or notice whether their outfit cost £20 or 20p. Don't feel pressurised and don't worry that your ds is going to stick out like a sore thumb - he really won't. Good luck

Thanks for amazing and fast advice, Binkie and Stickynote! Binkie, what a kind offer, which I would love to accept . The party is on 2 October, so if your ds is sweet enough to lend it, it would be lovely to hear from you on contact another talker, and I would like to pay the postage and promise to return it clean and in good condition. Actually, I think that you have gone back to work now, and if we can find a suitable date, it would be really nice to see you for lunch as I also work in the City. The last two weeks I feel like all I have done is deal with school and work, and only seen one close friend in person for weeks - and now I remember that I do have lots of friends around, except you are around online

Delighted to help! Will CAT you.

TaC, did you get my message? My home computer (where I sent from, ? grammer) has been playing up.

All is ready for you when you would like.

Got a new ELC catalogue and they've got some new fancy dress outfits including pirate, quite reaonsable I think, £10 alhtough not anything mind blowing that you couldn't do quite well yourelf.

Binkie, Thank you again! Was out of the office and got your email this morning. I hope to meet you soon and am no longer dreading the birthday party! BTW, Davros, I think you gave me some advice a year ago about shorthand - I have now learnt it and am developing my speed and it is very useful to me. Thanks for your advice and encouragement to learn.

T, just to let you know it's in the hands of our messengers - should be with you this pm.

Something spotted while packing it up - I do hope your ds isn't little for his age as I just noticed it's supposed to be for age 5-7. It was fine for my ds when he was 4 though.

Binkie, Really looking forward to getting the parcel - will send you a message when I get it . Let me know how you are placed for lunch next week. ATM I am around except for Monday. Just went and bought birthday gift, trying to exercise discipline and only spent £1 more than what I used to spend on Nursery birthdays!