New boarder - what to pack?

[Londonmummy66]

My DD is about to start boarding for 6th form. Other than uniform and bedding/towels what should we be thinking of packing? It's 3 weeks before an exeat so I was thinking 6 sets of casual clothes? Also are things like sewing kits and shoe cleaning kits useful or not?

She has a beside lamp and a plant to cheer her room up - anything else?

Anyone else with a new boarder want to have a mutual handholding support thread?

Did you not get a list from the school?

Our school gave us a list

mine take a thick mattress protector in case the mattress is not comfy.
My dd takes fairy lights and a cosy blanket. Flip flops for showers. Small mirror for bedroom. Alarm clock in case phones are taken in at night.

She'll be able to do laundry at school so won't need too many home clothes.
Mine have never used their sewing kits or shoe cleaning kits.
hope that helps. And good luck.

Ooh I am pleased
Exactly the same situation here! I had been thinking of reviving a new to boarding support thread
WRT clothes, it depends I suppose on how fast laundry is. They seem to spend a lot of time in uniform too. So DD has joggers and sloppy tops for mooching round in, normal jeans and some smart stuff in case she has to go to a formal meal
Mattress topper is def recommended (from other boarders mothers)
I've got a pile of snacks and sweets too for in her room
Full boarding as 3 weeks before exeat I presume
I'm going to be near to DD's school the first weekend she's there and will no doubt be dropping off other stuff

Thanks very much - no not really a proper list from the school just a list of the linen to bring plus generic items like casual clothes, toiletries etc.

Thanks for the tip on a mattress topper -I'd never have thought of that. I'll also sort out a mirror and flip flops! She bought a fluffy blanket with her birthday money.

We were in this position 2 years ago, DD has just finished and the experience was amazing.

DD had fairy lights for her area, plus pictures/photos of family and friends to stick up.
Extension lead.
Colourful cushions and a spare blanket to get cosy on the bed.
I gave her access to my amazon account for quick bits such as stationery.

At her school, sixth form did their own personal laundry, with help from the house parents as required. So I just made sure she only took clothes that could be machine washed and were pretty hard wearing.

I was surprised that most girls seemed to have a plastic type basket for toiletries and make up rather than a wash bag, but it certainly felt very homely to see make-up, hair brushes and more spilling over the baskets!

Mattress topper was in our bedding list from the school plus spare set of bedding for when one set was at the laundry.
The washable laundry bags were pretty useful as you can pop in socks etc and you won’t lose one in the wash.

Make sure the casual clothes are a mix of things to be seen out in and chilling out clothes.
Some stuff to make the room her own, posters, or photos. Maybe a cushion. If she is into it, some nice stationery for her desk.
Not too many sweets/snacks, there will probably be tuck and lots of food available and if sweets/snacks are available they might all get munched in a very short time!
Spare headphones.
Extra sanitary products.
They all seem to live in sliders (worn with socks - shudder) but some slippers or indoor shoes.

Thanks everyone, really helpful. She picked out some new duvet covers the other day and a fluffy blanket so that side of things is sorted. I was going to get her a strng of fairy lights with pegs for photos as she's not that girly. Baskets for makeup etc sound a good idea as she never puts anything away so probably easier to control her mess than washbags. I'll also order some mesh bags for washing clothes.

It's all starting to seem a bit real now - I'm going to miss her so much, although probably not her mess......

It is hard when they go, we were 2.5 hours away so couldn’t pop by to take her out for lunch! However we used to FaceTime, and 3 weeks does go by very quickly (for them at least as they’re so busy)
What I did try to do though was post her a notecard and a treat every couple of weeks which DD always appreciated,

Name everything and make sure she has some form of lockable box. Mine had old fashioned tuck boxes and they are still the best form of private lockable storage.

School provide a lockable cupboard, she just needs a padlock for it so that is a help. I hadn't thought of an extension lead so that is a good tip.

GCSEs were what she needed so that is one less worry on my list!!

Just packed both girls off on a trip to Spain so I have a quiet week of sewing on names tapes to look forward to.

THank you everyone for all the support here.

Very quickly we had a request for a cushioned mattress protector and an extra pillow.

Send her with something to wear for a meal out (mine used to go for pizzas with friends and sometimes their parents who were in the area). Her school also had a few social functions which required evening dress and heals. DD initially had a short black clingy dress and a silky red mid calf one, both really cheap (£20) but did the trick.

School will have toiletries for emergencies, but I sent mine with a good supply of everything. They weren't meant to have paracetamol in their rooms, but she had a few occasions of bad period pain, horrible flu bug, and it was better to have something in her room rather than having to go down a slight of stairs.

I don't think DD every needed a sewing kit. Sent her with a shoe cleaning kit, but I don't think it ever got used.

Don't forget dressing gown and comfy slippers.

Oh, and I sent mine with chocolate. Maybe give her a little extra money to start with, it was a big thing in the first term going to the local M&S/Tesco and buying treats.

I bought some massive laundary bags from Amazon. They're brilliant for squeezing their quilts in, packing heavy files (which she'll want to bring her next year to work on in hols), miscellanous stuff that hasn't been packed when you arrive to pick her up.

Nothing valuable or too precious- it's easy to lose things or lend them and they go AWOL. No serious stealing - except once and the girl was expelled as generally trouble - but it is really, really upsetting if something precious gets lost.

I second lockable box and/or padlock for suitcase and stuff can be kept there.

Hairdryer, hot water bottle, electric blanket, yes to alarm clock, sanitary products, paracetamol, photos for walls/desk.

I missed my DD more than I would have believed possible BUT she settled quickly and loved it, for 7 years. She is currently living at home post-uni and we are just as close. It was such a good thing for us all.

Take pillows if not on the list and name tape them. My DD nearly lost her lovely comfy pillows but for the sewn on name tape. A small, soft rug/bath mat is also lovely for beside the bed.

My DD also went away to board for 6th form. She loved it. She was at Marlborough so could pop into the town for most things she needed but I imagine that if you are in a more rural setting then you may need to provide more basics.

Our advice would be:
Very thick mattress topper, not just a padded cover. We bought a foam one on line.
As suggested joggers for lounging
A few smart dresses for formal occasions. She seemed to have lots of black tie and smart dinners.
Battery operated fairy lights as mains ones weren’t allowed.
I second the large bags. We had somehow acquired a few Ikea bags and they were perfect.
Backpack for days out or short trips.
Sliders for the shower or walking around house.
A prepaid coffee card and restaurant card so she could go out for lunch or a drink with friends without feeling like she was spending her normal money.

The matron did any sewing that was needed. There was a school wash for most stuff but she could wash delicates in house herself. HTH.

Cleopatra your post is very comforting. Dd is going next week. She is 11. I’m dreading it. I know it’s the best school we could have kind for her anywhere but still

My son went two years ago a few ups and downs but overall amazing ! He’s a different boy now well mannered confident thoughtful fantastic attitude bit work shy but couldn’t have asked for more. You’ll be glad you let her go just wait and see it’s a great experience.

Thanks parsley
[howls into pillow]

I know... I was dreading it too. I still remember feeling sick and when I dropped her off - I felt as if I was abandonning her. BUT sometimes they need the chance to see what they can do for themselves, DD was so happy, got a great education, independence, strong friendships and was able to do loads of sport and other activities that she couldn't have done at home.

I wish my DS could have boarded but he has some learning difficulties and I couldn't find a place for him.

Phones , e-mail, WhatsApp, little parcels of nice things sent down, visits (bringing cake to share with her friends), weekends at home and holidays all mean you are just as close as before. I was laughing with DD in the kitchen this morning that this will be the first September/October she has been home for 10 years!!! It'll be odd...

(Oh and yes to big IKEA bags!!)

Thanks. That’s exactly what I hope it will deliver for DD.

I've still got name taping to do 🙄😂 and starts school on Monday!
Seems DD has so much to take - it's not just clothes and bedding but arch files, stationary, tea pots, toiletries etc

If you look online there is something called a stinky bag. I bought one for when I travel to put worn underwear in. The whole bag can be put into the washing machine so privacy is there if that is important.

I don't know if this allowed, but when I left home for university my Mum gave me a popcorn popper. It was a great way to make friends. I like the silicone popper bowls that work like a charm in the microwave. I got mine on Amazon. Very inexpensive.

Also a sealable tub/Tupperware type thing to keep snacks in so nothing like mice can get to them.

I'm surprised at all the mattress toppers - I don't remember ever even noticing if a bed was uncomfortable until I was about 25!

I would suggest a few little props for making friends. A pack of cards or Uno can be good - terminally uncool at 15 but, by the 6th form, they like to think of themselves as sophisticated enough to embrace the naff . Occasionally schools don't allow normal playing cards (presumably a throwback to those innocent days when the rebel kids gambled instead of sending nude selfies ) but I'm sure Uno would be OK.

Sunblock. A couple of cushions to make the bed homely and so she can sit on it like a sofa with her back against the wall. At least 7 more phone charger cables than you would believe any human could need . Possibly noise-cancelling headphones, depending on whether she likes quiet when doing homework - you can get good ones for about £40 on Amazon.

Yes it's weird: I boarded in the 80s/90s and never had a mattress topper. Never noticed any issues.
My daughter started at age 11 and demanded one almost instantly.

I cant believe mattresses have got that much worse. Or my daughter is more princess-and-the-pea than I am. Mysterious.

We will see what my son says when he starts in a week