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I'm feeling miffed , but should I be.......................?

8 replies

Polgara2 · 14/09/2004 14:34

Opinions please oh wise ones. DD1 had bad day at school on Friday, apparently didn't feel well but this was not picked up on by anyone - not sure why. Anyway she was off on Monday back in today Tuesday. She was worried about not feeling well again and getting upset about going in. As I would be in school at lunchtime to pick up dd2 who is just starting and part-time (another nightmare!!) I said I would see her and check if she is alright. This seemed to reassure her (should point out she is somewhat oversensitive and gets upset at least thing - can't think where she gets that from !!!). Told her teacher this morning thats what I would be doing. Left her crying with teacher . Come lunch time we duly wait near dd1's classroom. Fifteen minutes later her teacher comes to door and says Everythings fine, do you want to go quickly now because we are coming out. Am almost stunned into silence, mumble something about making sure she knows I kept my promise and head for door. Indignation sets in by then and end up hanging around cloakroom door to catch glimpse of dd1, give her a quick hug as shes going to toilet and then scuttle off. So.......why didn't she want me to speak to dd1, I only wanted to hear from her that she was ok, especially as no-one seemed to have realised that illness was the problem on Friday - they had told me she was upset but not offered any real reason. Should I feel as I do or am I being over-sensitive myself. Bit long sorry, thanks if you're still here!!!

OP posts:
moosh · 14/09/2004 15:10

Not sure really, maybe the teacher thought that your dd would get upset again seeing you as you wrote that when you left her she was in tears. I myself would have wanted to catch a glimpse of my ds if that were me, but I too can understand the teachers point of view. Your dd probably settled quite quickly once you left, (our children are alot tougher than we mothers think ) and her teacher probably didn't want her upset again. Hope this helps but don't dwell on it too much as long as dd had a good productive day that is all that matters.

LIZS · 14/09/2004 15:40

Also not sure, but it could be that the teacher is worried that the other children might wonder why their mums weren't there too and perhaps there is another sensitive child among them who would get upset. However if the teacher knew in advance that your dd was expecting to see you then she should have contrived it without that sort of fuss.

On one occasion last year ds had a reportedly difficult day at school, we went on a playdate after school and he threw up on the way home. I had no idea he was unwell any more than his teacher did. It happens I'm afraid.

cazzybabs · 14/09/2004 15:43

As a teacher I would have asked you to do the same thing - your dd is probably fine when you are out of sight out of mind. The teacher probably thought your dd (who is no doubt fine) would get upset again by seeing you....

but as a parent I would do what you did!

tigermoth · 15/09/2004 07:12

good answer cazzybabs!

MeanBean · 15/09/2004 08:27

Agree with the others that the teacher probably thought you'd upset your DD again, and didn't feel the need to explain that properly to you because you're only a parent.

Socci · 15/09/2004 11:25

Message withdrawn

Polgara2 · 01/10/2004 21:10

Thank you everyone - made me feel a bit better. My computer hasn't been working til now so thats why didn't acknowledge - sorry. There's been a lot more problems since then but am too stressed and exhausted by it all to talk about it at the mo . Thanks again.

OP posts:
blossomhill · 01/10/2004 21:12

Sorry to hear things aren't going to well at the moment polgara

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