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Original poster

Fines for poor attendance

25 replies

1School1 · 16/11/2018 15:23

Hi all my step son lives with his mum 100miles away and he stays with us once every three weeks for the weekend.
His attendance has been flagged up with school and dad (my husband) has been told both mum AND him will be fined. He has no control over his sons school attendance
Is he by law really expected to pay the fine along side the mum ?

OP posts:
AnguaResurgam · 17/11/2018 11:49

Yes, iI'm afraid so. All those with PR are liable, even if non-resident.

Why is the DC not attending?

Original poster
1School1 · 17/11/2018 12:14

That is ridiculous when one parent has no say over schooling and lives100 miles away

OP posts:
PotteringAlong · 17/11/2018 12:16

If he has parental responsibility he does have a say over his schooling, in terms of which school he attends.

Why is he not going to school?

stumpyteapot · 17/11/2018 12:21

Your DH needs to be bit proactive here and speak with the school to find out what's going on if he hasn't already.

Just because his child is not living with him doesn't mean he not longer has a responsibility for the child's welfare.

If the child is not going to school isn't your DH concerned about what's going on ? If the mother is failing in her responsibility in ensuring an education perhaps it's time the child cane to live with you ?

delilahbucket · 17/11/2018 12:24

Joint parental responsibility is just that - joint. Not as and when it suits. He does have control and so he needs to step up and find out what is going on.

Original poster
1School1 · 17/11/2018 12:34

Because his mum has lazy mornings and wakes up late !!!!!!!

OP posts:
Original poster
1School1 · 17/11/2018 12:35

It’s not a case of stepping up what’s he supposed to do travel 100 miles every morning to make sure songoes to school..... wake up it’s the Mum needs to step up

OP posts:
Original poster
1School1 · 17/11/2018 12:36

In constant contact with school

OP posts:
MissMalice · 17/11/2018 12:38

This is your husband’s child. He doesn’t get to shirk responsibility. If mum isn’t meeting the child’s needs, he should be considering applying to court to take over day to day care of the child.

youarenotkiddingme · 17/11/2018 12:42

What Malice said

Tinty · 17/11/2018 12:45

Well maybe he shouldn't have moved 100 miles away then he could be more involved with his son and take him to school instead of leaving it all up to him Dmum!

Bombardier25966 · 17/11/2018 12:47

Can he ring up at a set time each morning to check they're up?

How old is son?

PepsiLola · 17/11/2018 13:35

Shouldn't have moved 100 miles away from his dependent really...

Original poster
1School1 · 17/11/2018 14:07

Jesus Christ I know this is mumsnet but most of u r anti men clearly I asked a simple question

OP posts:
MissMalice · 17/11/2018 14:12

Not anti men at all. You just didn’t get the answer you wanted. Your DH can’t shirk his responsibilities and that’s what’s he’s currently doing. He can either step up or accept the fine. If it continues and he does nothing, both him and his ex could face imprisonment. But more than that - your DH should be concerned about his son, his son’s education and be doing everything he can to give him the best life possible.

So no - not anti men. I’m anti shirker.

prh47bridge · 17/11/2018 15:21

I'm afraid the fines apply to everyone with parental responsibility, regardless of whether or not he has any influence over his son's poor attendance. However, whether he will actually be fined depends on the local authority. Some will not fine the non-resident parent if it is clear that there is no realistic way they can influence attendance.

Original poster
1School1 · 17/11/2018 15:36

Thankyou prh47bridge

OP posts:
Original poster
1School1 · 17/11/2018 15:37

That’s all I was asking
Do one malice u know of the circumstances

OP posts:
SuburbanRhonda · 17/11/2018 15:43

His dad needs to contact the school and ask if the education welfare officer is involved and what they are doing to ensure his son’s attendance.

If EW are unblocked, he might want to consider attending any meetings with them so he can show he’s committed to supporting his son’s mother to get her child to school, and is willing to do whatever he can, even from a distance.

SuburbanRhonda · 17/11/2018 15:44

Involved, not unblocked

OldBean2 · 17/11/2018 15:47

Hi OP, how old is DSS? Is he able to get to school on his own? If he is able to, then buy him an alarm clock so you can say that although you do not live with him you have taken appropriate steps.

Have you spoken to the attendance officer to ask what other steps you could take, so that it is evidenced that you are doing everything to support attendance.

I am sorry that you and your husband find yourselves in this situation.

blackcat86 · 17/11/2018 15:55

OP I think it depends if your DH is known to the school. If either mum has listed him on the intake paperwork on DH has made himself known to the school and evidenced PR. If yes to either then they absolutely have the power to fine both parents (but it doesn't mean they will). I would ensure that the school are sending him copies of any correspondence, inviting him to meetings and informing him when DS doesn't attend. If they are happy to fine him then they need to be communicating with him as well. Is DS of an age where he could get himself up and to school? Are SS or EW involved? Has he got some kind of attendance plan?

youarenotkiddingme · 17/11/2018 16:02

Malice is right though that if mum isn't prioritising the education and attendance he can and should apply to court to be RP.

No one expects him to get him to school daily from 100miles away. But he is a parent with equal PR and should be finding a way to meet his parental responsibilities.

Agreed it's not easy - but it's possible and there routes to go down.

I agree that some posters automatically are anti NRP (especially when it's dads).
You also don't mention who moved away - did mum move him from his original place of residence or did dad move away?

roisinagusniamh · 22/11/2018 18:01

Both parents will be expected to attend an Attendance meeting where they will receive advice on getting their son into school.

BeanBagLady · 30/11/2018 07:52

Is your main concern the fine, or the education?

If my child was being let down like this I would do all I could to move back into the same street and get him picked up.

But I realise that is an extreme move and not possible for many.

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