Independent / private school open days. Advice?

[Elvienstar]

Realise this is early, but my DS has just turned 1 and I'd like to start researching local independent schools. Since I haven't been to one myself, I wondered if anyone has any advice on what to look for in an independent school and what to ask at open day? Would they be happy for me to bring a 1yr old and say we're interested to start once he reaches reception age? Decisions are tricky because it seems if you want them at certain senior schools you need to target certain preps. But it's too early to know how academic or sporty they'll be.

Forgot to say TIA!!

Check out the general information provided from the Good Schools guide or better make an appointment for a consultation. Their consultants are fab.
Great talks to address your concerns at The Independent Schools show in Battersea ( in November) lots of schools exhibit so you can chat informally to staff.
It’s a great starting point.

Thank you for the pointers - I hadn't heard of that show before, will look into it

Good luck with everything and unless you are a multi millionaire,start saving!!

Do not go to open days with a 1 year old- except nurseries. Every year at nlcs I see parents with infants. We're polite and answer questions but really we're thinking ' Go away for two years! You have no idea what that cute little lump will be like and you could do much nicer things with your day.'.

I do think it's far too early to look round. Have a look online to see which schools you might be interested in. Put your names down if the school requires it but wait until your child is older to look round as you'll have a better idea of what might suit him.

Not necessarily too soon. Dd was registered at 6 months and had a definite reception place whereas her then 3yo brother was on the waiting list and had no place offered until y3. Some schools fill up early although many hedge their bets with more than one school or state schools so there may be movement later on. Having sad that the first visit is better done without a lo in tow.

it's far too early to start looking now as the schools will be so different by the time yours goes.
When i look at the changes in just a term at my dd school and others, it's a complete waste of time.
As you say you don't even know yet what sort of learner your child will be or what extracurricular activities would be best.

I suppose you could get an idea of what they are like, and keep checking for changes every term, if you are that interested at this point.
You could see which ones excelled in certain subjects, but this too is likely to change.

Thanks for all the replies.

Any advice on the original question of what to ask / look for at open day?

... When I eventually go - think everyone has answered the part about potentially starting too early :-D

Open days are fine in a general sort of way.
I found the best way to get a real feel for a School was to request a visit outside of the open day. Some people even advocate just turning up and asking to be shown around. A good School should certainly be happy to show you around with an appointment. If they don’t then they know their intakes are guaranteed and you will be on a waiting list. Or they do not trust their control of the school - but there again I am a cynic!

As for what to ask - the short and probably not so helpful answer, is the same as you would ask at a state school - the school’s ethos, structure of the children’s day, support staffing, facilities, where children move on to, support for educational support., how the staff behave /interact with the children. To give an example the school where DD went to - we went around just before break time with the head; he took us on a tour and he was virtually mobbed by the kids - they all wanted to talk to him, telling him what they were doing etc. He knew all their names and was clearly happy to be in the company of children.

Go to open days to soak up the feeling of the place. Go to open days at the same schools again and again to see how they flex and change. And then book appointments at the ones you feel comfortable with and ask those questions more tailored to your child - if they are easily distracted, how do the teaching staff help them stay on track, that sort of thing. Questions you cannot ask at an open day as there are too many people.

I don't think it's ever too early to start getting a picture of and a feel for your local schools, especially if it is about an investment of hundreds of thousands of pounds over the next 18 years. Best thing is to study their websites first and depending on how comprehensive they are you might want to make further inquiries: fees, expected annual increases (most schools say 4%), leavers destinations, class sizes, curriculum (e.g. what languages?), offers and costs of extra curriculars, SEND support and costs if required, any 5 year visions/builduing programs etc. Then of course you want to know about the application system: is it first come first serve, by ability (will it be more of a taster day with observation or more of a formal exam/interview), and whether there is an application deadline and registration fee. Also ask if there is anything for families who have their dc registered early ( some schools offer toddler swimming courses or play sessions or will invite you to fetes or performances). Both of my dc schools invited us regularly to events and sessions during the 18 months prior to their start, and they started in their pre-prep departments at 2.5 years, so they were basically a part of their respective schools since they had learned to walk. I found it helpful to know that they felt comfortable in the environment and they were not faced when they started properly. No school will be able to tell you which senior school might be suitable to your little one just yet, but you are absolutely entitled to ask about the workings of it all: how will the head make his recommendation (based on a standardized test in year 9 or more wholistically), do they have scholarship classes, how does the setting system work (fluent or not so?), do they prepare for 11+ as well as 13+? What are leavers destinations at 11+ (almost all schools only ever publish 13+ destinations on their websites if school leads up to 13+). And of course whatever you are interested in. You are the costumer. You might also want to look at their accounts and whether they are at capacity, or whether they have lots of empty spaces, to gauge sustainability of the school. Outside of London even some amazing big name schools can't fill their classes. It's only fair and savy to get an idea of the system and options early on as you are competing for places with lots of families who either have been to private school themselves or are teachers in the private system.

Where in the country are you?

If in London you will have both a huge choice and perhaps need to decide quite early. Schools are over subscribed so you need to apply to several.

No one minded a baby coming too, though it might be easier without. They wil say if they object.

Treat it like buying a house and you are a first time buyer. Listen hard. Thee are things schools will tell you, and things other parents ask that will resonate. You will soon build up a list of what matters to you. Practical things are important. Being on a bus route meant we could drop off beforework, au pairs etc could pick our DC easily and when they were older they could go on their own. Before or after school care can be a godsend if you plan to go back to work. Destination schools are important in so far as you want to keep doors open. So they send some children to flight academic schools, or some to state grammars etc. Numbers do not matter and it may not be your child, but you want to know they can. Look at arts, music or sport in case these are directions your DC might go.

But most of all think about your child. Will a busy school suit or something more nurturing. Do you like the feel. To some extent it does not matter what they learn between the ages of 3 and 7/8. They need to be happy and to learn to enjoy school and education. Unless they are clearly very bright I would avoid the sort of school that is very focussed on London 7+. Some will be sucessful, others will decide from an early stage that they are failures.

And do look at the other parents. DH point blank refused to consider one school because of the number of blazers and Range Rovers on display in the car park. Or sneak into the nearest cafe on a Friday morning and listen to the school run mums. There is some seriously competitive (soically and/or academically) parenting going on in London and some schools are more popular than others with various groups. I helped out at some open days and liked the mum who asked about wrap around care. She had not dared to ask in the HM session, but was very relieved to hear that the school had good provision and was generally a preferred choice for working mums. (The GSG referred to it as popular with first time buyers - reflecting the fact that local state catchment schools were troubled so plenty who had to make a move or go private decision and were surprised to find themselves paying.)

Thank you so much for these details guys, that's exactly what I needed because I'm so new to this. Great idea to follow up with a private tour. Yes exactly - it's such an important decision I'd like to prepare early. I'm based in Cambridgeshire; I've no idea how quickly those schools fill. Does anyone know about the schools in that area?

Please may I check with you - when you register a young child, do they have the place secured? Some seem to have a minor assessment, eg of their character. Does that come after you've registered? Or is it like plane flights - they accept payment from more people than they have spaces for? Is that why you have to register at several?

I think it is usual to have some form of taster nearer the start date. Dd spent a morning in the nursery class doing stuff one to one and in groups - puzzles, listening to a story, making something - to check her attention span and interactions. In London things can be more competitive and academic.

Registration is usually separate from securing a place. They all have different policies though, check their websites for their admission policies.

We found we learned the most from the girls who showed us round. They are less likely to feed you marketing hype and more likely to tell you what it's like to be at the school. Ask them about sports facilities, music, drama, the quality of the food, out of school trips, etc. Work out if you need to be uber bright or just more easy going. They will let slip all sorts of nuggets of info and you'll be able to judge if that is how you want your child to live and possibly turn out. The thing we learned the most was what it was really like to be a day girl at a boarding school.

Whereabouts in Cambridgeshire- are you focusing on the Cambridge independent schools? If not, what’s the focal point of your search?

You register for a place everywhere you are interested in. You then have to jump through additional hoops to actually get a place, but the hoops vary depending on school.

The registration fee only covers the administrative costs of keeping your name on the application list and is not refundable. So you need to ask when and how they make a decision about which child to offer places. They may well confirm your place at point of registration, tell you you are on the waiting list, or that the decision will be made after some form of selection process (observed play, chat with teacher, possibly some counting or phonics tests at a v academicly selective school). In Cambridge you have the all through Perse schools which have a great rep but I don't know anyone who currently has kids there. Then there are the college based schools. I heard great things of King's. My DS is at a college foundation school at the other place and we really like it. Lots of other choices in Cambridge so you really have to start early and put some legwork in to find the school with the right feel that also practically and financially works for you. And yes, ask the kids who will lead you around as tour guides: they are usually very honest about bullying, work load, quality of food etc.

Thank you, I'm understanding now how registration can be separate to securing a place. And that's a great idea to have good questions ready for current students to help see if your little one will fit in.

We're currently focusing on the centre of Cambridge. Thinking of visiting Heritage, Sancton Wood, Stephen Perse Foundation, St Faiths, Kings and St Johns. Realise they're very different! But think visiting will help narrow choices.

Things to think about when deciding which to go on the list for:

1. Do you have particular subjects (eg a particular language) that you want dc to do? And do you want a school that ‘tries’ a couple of languages over the first few years, or one where they just get on and learn one or two languages ‘properly’ from the off?
2. What do you do and how will you manage school holiday childcare? St faiths has more holiday than some of the others, I’m told.
3. What would you be happy to pay for on top of fees (some fees are all inc, others you have to pay for trips on top, others you have food as an additional bill...)?
4. What is their approach to progression through the school? How many children do not ‘progress’ to the next part of the school? Ask for stats.
5. If your child is struggling with something, what remedial help will they give or are you going to have to engage outside tutors on top of school?

Visit each school, preferably on a school day, and really try to get a feel for the ethos and ‘vibe’.

Good luck.

That's a great list. Thank you so much to everyone for your suggestions.

Apologies in advance for the essay length post. I recommend researching local schools in the area to begin with. Think about your child. Are they typically quiet or not? Do they have special educational needs or a physical disability or not?

Listen to the gossip about the school. Parents are a useful source of information.

Arrange a time to visit with your child in tow as well. If you can please observe a actual lesson. Have a list of questions to ask divided up into categories for convenience. Talk with the students and staff members as well. Check out the website of the school. Oftentimes they have a lot of information. Find out as much details as you can possibly.

Also read the school report carefully. If you find any curriculum booklets I recommend taking a look. They were a useful resource for us.

If you are in the city of London you will have a extensive choice of schools. Narrow it down taking into account his needs and abilities generally speaking here. Trust your gut feeling about the school. It is not all about the results of exams etc. League results tables do not tell you anything really important. Forget about them.