Moving DD in Year 9

[janknitti]

Hi interested if anyone has been through this experience and has any advice please. My DD attends a senior school locally, it’s pretty small, 50 / 50 advantaged / disadvantaged pupils. DD is clever and older in her peer group - Oct birthday. Today there has been a bullying incident, whole clique has excluded her. I have reported this to school. But to be honest regardless of what school do it won’t make them be friends with her. Basically these are 13-14yr old girls whose weekends consist of drinking in the park. DD doesn’t want to be part of this. This is partially the reason for the clique exclusion. Today she was in her cello lesson and missed a lesson and some of the clique cheered 😡Things have happened before - generally every 6mths or so and I think she is quite lonely. She has said yes to moving schools. Would a fresh start help? Has anyone had same experience? She dances outside of school gets on really well with friends there so I don’t think it’s her iyswim?

If she wants to move schools then the sooner the better as GCSE teaching will most likely already have started (if she is currently Y9) in some if not all subjects and she may have to catch up outside of school, especially if options have been taken and don’t transfer across. Moving won’t necessarily be the magic bullet though as friendship groups will be well-established in a new school and your DD may find it hard to break in.

It can help, but it’s not going to be easy.

We moved our child after ongoing bullying and nasty behaviour which came in cycles (would be okay for a while then start again). It wasn't in year 9 so there were no GCSE issues to consider. It was the best decision we ever made though and we've never looked back. I just wish we had done it sooner rather than trying so hard to fix the unfixable if that makes sense. Good luck either way. Not an easy decision.

We moved our son in year 9 to a new school due to severe bullying. (He was not going to school at all, and had LA support at home , and attended a ZAP training day, which was brilliant) . He was very scared about the move. However, he now says it was the best thing that ever happened to him- the school gave him extra friendship support, and despite the school's misgivings about him doing so many GCSE's after missing a year's teaching, he worked amazingly hard and ended up with 11, nearly all A*. He is now at University, happy and confident- unrecognisable from when he was bullied..
So I don't think you can make a decision lightly about moving school, but it can work out very well.Good luck whatever you decide!

Hi, sorry this is happening. i don't think it's your DD at all. If there is a more suitable school, and she is happy to move then I would give it a go. I would be making sure she understands that there might be bullies wherever she goes, but the chance of a 'new start' in a school where she is more likely to have things in common with more people then it could be worth a try. Keep in mind the outcome of secondary school that you want for her - GCSEs - she can move again for 6th form - that breaks things up and keep up friends outside of school - my DD benefits from friends at activity groups who all attend a variety of schools. Good luck

If you can, do it. It sounds hideous.
fwiw dds' school has lots of new entrants in yr9 (independent) and they have all settled in well.