Punishment for girl lifting dd's skirt up? (both yr9)

[Biscuitspread]

Just curious about how angry I should be at this. My dd is upset another girl lifted her skirt up not once but twice at school this morning. My daughter has reported it and is still upset though making a joke of it saying "I didn't even have my nice knickers on." If this was my office environment it would be an instant dismissal. Wwyd?

Yes, of course you should be angry. Why is this girl trying to embarrass your DD? Is there a backstory?

I think you should follow this up with the school.

Yes there is a back story Greenfingers, this girl has targeted my dd before (writing rude things in her book and swearing at her) I have contacted school who says the girls will get a detention (apparently there was another girl laughing) I don't think that a detention is enough, especially with the back story.

Yeah, sounds like borderline bullying to be honest. Have you flagged the backstory with the school? I think they need to take further action than a detention.

Sorry for your DD.

Thanks Greenfingers

Nothing borderline about this bullying. Demand something be done about it. Then teach your daughter that if she does it again, she is to ask really loudly ‘why does x always want to see my bum?’

I'm sure the school have their own guidelines. Presumably you should consult their website for guidance. We can't help because we didn't create the school's procedures.

Definitely follow this up at school. No school would allow this and it needs to be addressed.
I would be inclined to write to the class teacher and head teacher asking what steps will be taken to protect your child - once the incident has been confirmed.

I would frame your complaint as sexual harassment/sexually inappropriate behaviour. Exposing her underwear is very much unacceptable and not to be dismissed as kids being silly by that age.

How old are the children in question?

Oh, apologies, year 9

You don't think the detention is enough.

What do you think should happen?

@binary - if a boy had done it at year 9 a far bigger deal would have been made of it. The school would be falling over themselves to punish him as it would have been sexual harassment. As it’s a girl it’s being treated as bullying and not sexual harrassment.

It’s called sexual misconduct at that age, especially as it is being done by a girl who clearly thinks she has more power and dominance.

(It can also be a bit of a red flag that the girl could be being abused, but that part isn’t your concern).

If it was at my school it would be at least an internal exclusion and we would get her parents in for a discussion as well.

Thanks all. Found out from my daughter the class had moved seating plan and she is back sitting beside this girl. I had been verbally reassured two months ago that the form teacher would ask all teachers to re-do their seating plans to prevent the girls sitting together. So I think I will speak to the school. Also, the teacher had told the bully a parent has called in with a complaint - the bully then asked my daughter if it was me. I'm really annoyed as I don't think this should have been said by the teacher.

How old is she - does year 9 mean she's 13? Not from the UK.

At 13 I had periods and pubic hair, and would have been mortified. I agree it's quite a serious thing.

Yes yr 9 is 13 or 14 years of age