Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Education

Join the discussion on our Education forum.

Daughter has 3 A-Levels (AAB) but 2 years on, still hasn't done anything with them.

27 replies

HappyBlue10 · 26/02/2017 23:54

-sigh-

DD works in Tesco (she likes it, but doesn't want to be there forever, but works there part-time to gain some money). She also volunteers but she hates it (admin type volunteering but for a charity).

She has saved about £5,000 and has brought a car and can drive.

She now wants to do more education but admits she can't stand the subjects she took at a level (only thing she enjoys from them is the Maths she did) but says she hates all careers that it leads to.

She's so bloody negative and has no ambition.

She rolls out of bed at 4pm and spends the rest of her time watching YouTube videos. Yes she works (but only 11 hrs a week) and volunteering is only an hour a week.

She helps around the house but really, I can't stand how lazy she is! She has 12 hours of work to do a week and that's it.

She says she wants to be a scientist that deals with wildlife but laughs when I say she can do it, as she says no one ever gets a job in it and then strolls off back to her room.

She tried to get some wildlife experience (volunteering) but out of the 4 places she applied to, none said she could (2 didn't even reply).

I am so done with her. She is 18 now and really needs to sort herself out. Grrrr.

OP posts:
TripTrapTripTrapOverTheBridge · 27/02/2017 00:01

She completed her a levels at 16?

Ferrisday · 27/02/2017 00:02

She got a levels at 16?
Can she do any other a levels? The subjects she might be interested in ?

HappyBlue10 · 27/02/2017 00:06

No, she's 19. 18 was typo.

OP posts:
Finola1step · 27/02/2017 00:07

18?

Finola1step · 27/02/2017 00:07

Ah, x post.

HappyBlue10 · 27/02/2017 00:09

Sorry for the confusion!

--Fat thumbs
Proof read--

OP posts:
babyunicornvomit · 27/02/2017 00:11

Just to let you know, my best mate did Maths, Biology and Chemistry at A-Level and is studying English Lit now, she just had to submit a 'test' essay and show her passion for the subject! Thats at a top 10 UK uni too. If your daughter has no interest in her A-Level subjects it shouldnt be a problem really.
I'd agree she needs to do something though - my mum made me work full time and contribute to the household (not loads but 10% of my earnings), before I got my act together and went to uni. She should do more, she sounds clever and Tesco isn't really testing her. Good luck to her! And if she's looking at uni's, look at Lancaster! I go there and it's great Grin

antimatter · 27/02/2017 00:12

She isn't paying her bills so she has no motivation to work longer hours.

Plenty of full-time volunteering posts if she wants to invest some of her savings into finding out what is like to do it.

www.environmentjob.co.uk/volunteering/34-conservation-wildlife

IHeartKingThistle · 27/02/2017 00:13

Oh tricky. So she still lives at home?

Slightly different but BIL graduated with a good degree then worked in a record shop for nearly 10 years before he figured out what he wanted to do. Now high earner in big company etc.

At least when she does figure it out she has her qualifications under her belt. She won't have to go back and get her GCSEs like so many people have to. But in the meantime I bet it is infuriating.

Does she pay towards her keep?

HappyBlue10 · 27/02/2017 00:16

I thought that about uni, but don't you have to be 21? So considered a mature student? She turns 20 soon, but still a little way to go.

She pays £50 a month.

Thanks for the advice. Those trips abroad seem very good and a great way to find experience.

OP posts:
user1488153080 · 27/02/2017 00:17

Please dont give up on her. Im sure you wont as she is your DD but she needs encouragement- that and a rocket up her arse.

Im 25 and starting a new job tomorrow. It will be the first time ive worked in 8 years due to health issues and then completely losing my confidence to go and actually do something.

At 20/21 I thought it wouldn't matter and had plenty of time but im horrified how quickly the years have gone by and what I could of achieved by now if I just got on with it and at least tried.

From a positive point of view- she is doing SOMETHING. So there is no gap on her CV, she has a reference to give an employer and volunteering will look good on her CV no matter how little she is doing.

Could you sit down with her at the computer maybe and look at jobs with her and help her apply? It wasn't until someone helped me look and to apply for a job that gave me the confidence to go to the interview and I got it.

Ferrisday · 27/02/2017 00:17

I finished my a levels and worked for 4 years before I went to Uni. Was full time though, in a bank, so career type job.

I did a level English at night school, much more interesting than my school a levels, so did that at Uni

Leggit · 27/02/2017 00:25

Why does she have to be 21 to go to uni?

HappyBlue10 · 27/02/2017 00:26

I mean 21 to be able to get on a course without having previous qualifications that are related?

OP posts:
5OBalesofHay · 27/02/2017 00:35

Why does she have to go to university? If she likes working at Tesco could she get more hours?

HappyBlue10 · 27/02/2017 00:37

She likes it as a part time job and is adamant she doesn't want to be there forever.

She doesn't have to go to uni but has expressed an interest in uni education.

OP posts:
BettyBaggins · 27/02/2017 00:41

THIS is the last opportunity to apply for this paid 12 week live in wildlife conservation training.

She has saved £5000?! Wow!

5OBalesofHay · 27/02/2017 00:42

I think you may have to leave her to work this one out. I think that is the hardest part of young adult offspring. Makes you nostalgic for the toddler years!

TripTrapTripTrapOverTheBridge · 27/02/2017 00:53

Has she looked into zoology or wildlife conservation degrees? If she didn't do sciences at A level she could always do a foundation year.

There should be some interesting voluntary opportunities out there too. Has she looked at the local zoo for opportunities etc? Would've thought that would be a fab start

JudgeJudySheidlin · 27/02/2017 01:24

A friend of DS's girlfriend has been offered a science related course at a top flight uni this September. She left sixth form in 2015 with A Levels in arts subjects so no you don't have to be 21 to qualify for university based only on experience.

BTW I know how you feel as I have a DS who left sixth form 3 years ago & is working in a warehouse. He's bored to tears yet hasn't pushed himself to look for something more suitable. His self esteem is quite good, but he's painfully shy with new people. I know he'll be OK but until then I'm going to continue to worry about him!

titchy · 27/02/2017 07:41

She could start a course with a foundation year this September. If she leaves it another year she'd probably have to do an Access to Science course.

Assuming she wants to go to university of course.

happygardening · 27/02/2017 08:04

IME it's not uncommon for this age group to not have the faintest idea about what they want to do and some do feel they have the "wrong A" levels. Has she looked at Scottish universities? The ones we've looked at Edinburgh and Glasgow want you to take three subject in the first year and they don't all have to be related to your A levels. Glasgow in particular seems to be very flexible, we met a 2nd year student who did three subjects in her first year 1 was one of her A levels 2 weren't by the end of the 1st year she discovered she didn't like any of them and was doing three (or maybe two) completely unrelated subjects in her second year and was planning to continue 1 of these for her third and fourth year. She loved the flexibility it offered. I love Edinburgh to visit but Glasgow I suspect would be better to live in especially if your young, it has a real buzz to it, it's significantly less touristy that Edinburgh and very friendly. The only problem is the weather isn't great.

Mary21 · 27/02/2017 08:43

www.volunteerics.org or workaway

2014newme · 27/02/2017 11:37

4 places is hardly any. People write to 40 places.
This apathy would drive me mad too she sounds depressed

homebythesea · 27/02/2017 12:50

She doesn't necessarily need to go to Uni - google post A level choices and you will find various apprenticeshps and schemes run by some quite prestigious companies for school leavers. Her work experience since dong A levels will work in her favour. She has excellent grades!

But she needs to want to do it and I fear her life is too easy at the moment to provide the incentive she needs. £50 a month is paltry. Her student friends will be paying £50-£100 a WEEK without home comforts and someone doing the laundry. Time for some tough love and cards putting on tables....

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.