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Thread For Boarders

826 replies

morethanpotatoprints · 01/06/2015 11:33

Just thought I'd start a support thread for those either starting this september or established boarders happy to help those with many queries.

There are quite often individual threads for particular schools but it doesn't necessarily say whether boarding, day, private or state in the title. So I thought this would be a good way of getting us all together and also for those people from overseas looking for particular types of schools.

My dd is starting in sept and will weekly board, atm I am gathering uniform and other essential items and will begin the labelling process soon.
I do quite like this as sad as it seems, I find hand sewing very therapeutic and relaxing for some reason. Grin

OP posts:
ZeroFunDame · 19/06/2015 07:37

Are you sure you read the Tonbridge admissions page with with full attention petit? They do appear to offer a modified entry procedure for boys at schools that don't prepare for CE. (Obviously I've no idea if what's on the website pertains in practice right now.) It looks as if you would still be too late - though a tiny number of boys can join at 14.

It is very difficult to find oneself in the "wrong" sort of prep - one that only prepares for entry to it's own senior school at 11 - because unless you've really thought ahead, by the time you realise you might want a different path (pre-test and CE) it's too late to do anything about it.

happygardening · 19/06/2015 07:47

zero is right you might be took late to register for Tonbridge. I'm scratching around in my dust covered memory bank but I think I looked at Tonbridge when DS2 was about 8 maybe 9 max because you had to register quite early they obviously pre test in he 6. It's quite competitive to get into easier than Eton Harrow but I think the head said 4 applicants for the every place although this was a long time ago so don't know what it is now.

ZeroFunDame · 19/06/2015 07:55

Exactly - I left out the important point that you would really have needed to be ready for pre-tests in yr 6.

But I also wanted to protest at my phone's insertion of a rogue "'".Hmm

morethanpotatoprints · 19/06/2015 12:14

Another daft question that's not worth contacting school over.

Why would you presume they would ask for a battery charger for mobile phones rather than the normal plug in ones.
Also. has anybody any experience of these as I'm not sure what to buy.
Do you just put rechargeable batteries in them and keep recharging the batteries? It seems like a lot of faffing about.
I have the feeling I'm being a bit dim again Grin

OP posts:
happygardening · 19/06/2015 17:25

I've got this battery charger thing (it was given to me as a gift she hastily adds, when I got it I hadn't the faintest idea what it was I had to pretend I did and look pleased with it) it's a white box with a very slightly different bloody end to my iPhone wire so Im always picking up the wrong wire you charge it like your mob and it then charges your mob. I think it's designed for travelling etc. when you might not be able to access a plug everyday. I cannot imagine why anyone would give one to me you wouldnt use a normal plug into the wall charger in a boarding school. Maybe a non technophobe will be able to tell you.

Kenlee · 19/06/2015 23:58

I know the answer to this. The charger is used when they are on traveling to keep their phones charged . Some planes on long flights do not have charger ports. The music has to be their own. The films are there to keep them occupied when the phone is charging.

I have an international boarder question. If her child is picked up by their appointed Guardian. Do they have to pay extra? I haven't encountered this as I have a very good brother in law.

Ahwoo · 20/06/2015 06:12

OP, you mean a Power Bank for the phone. I got confused when you said battery charger thingy.
Yes, they are primarily used for charging on the go. Depending on the capacity and reliability, you can use them 1000+ times. They're not expensive.

TheBlessedCheesemaker · 20/06/2015 07:12

Ah, petitdonkey, when I suggested you name the school, I wasn't expecting it to be one I myself would know anything to comment on.. One of my DC is friends with a really good all-rounder sports boy in your son's year in Ashford. If indeed you are Ts mum then I will stay disguised and just say hi.

I think the key things you need to think about are what your child would gain whilst he is there, what impact being a day pupil will have on all of you, what impact being a boarder would have on him, and what impact it will have on his future life. I'd consider drawing up pros and cons under these headings.

Day pupils seem to stay busy at kings till 8.30/9.00, sometimes later. AFAiK there is still a sizeable waiting list of day pupils wanting to switch to boarding because going home is a pain (especially if it means a long schlep down the A28). I personally know mums who didn't really think these finishing times were true and who were totally shell-shocked when it happened to them. So then the fact that this is one of the few schools remaining with proper full
Boarding becomes quite key to the decision-making process. I think there is a chink of light in terms if this (floating exeats being tried this year) but any change here might come very slowly.

In your position, if you have one of those boys who is really up for everything, who you know will dive into two or three sports and pop up in the As or Bs, who will stick their hand up for drama, will join a choir or rock ensemble, volunteer for the debating society and so on, then switch to Kings. There will be value for money for kids like this. Likewise, an outgoing and sociable child will adapt well to the full boarding experience and will have the time of their lives. But otherwise, and particularly if you are thinking of a day option and you live near Ashford, the benefits are less clear-cut. Especially as the fees are on a par with Eton/Tonbridge, but academically the school looks as if it isn't quite in that league at the moment (although they have jumped up and down the top schools lists over recent years)

At the end of the day, your kids will probably pop out of ashford with the same a levels, heading for the same schools. They won't be part of the toffs crowd at Uni, for sure, but that doesn't strike me as a bad thing. And you will save an awful lot of money.

There is a whole other story about whether having a big school name behind you helps or hinders future life/outlook/Job prospects/social standing, but its so subjective that you and your DH will have to work through that one by yourselves to agree a view of what you think the impact is likely to be and what value/detriment you assign to it.

Feel free to PM if you want any detailed info. If you do decide on kings, you will do a lot worse than Galpin's, or Carlyon as a house choice (Carlyon not very pretty, mind. It's all about the housemaster and their families with these two recommendations).

summerends · 20/06/2015 07:24

when I got it I hadn't the faintest idea what it was I had to pretend I did and look pleased with it Smile

morethan perhaps there are only a few sockets and they want to avoid the DCs arguing over them. Although they would still have to recharge the powerbank at some point.

Kenlee do you mean pay the school extra? That would be odd but some 'guardians' need paying to defray expenses and time. Also as you know certain taxi companies provide an unaccompanied minor service for the airports which they charge extra for.

happygardening · 20/06/2015 08:00

If it's for travelling I can't imagine why you need one OP unless as summer says if there's a shortage of plugs in dorms and teachers charge them some were else. Mine wouldn't charge a mob 1000 times (yes I've actually used it) may three times.

Ahwoo · 20/06/2015 10:46

happy I meant 1000+ cycles (charge/discharge), although like all rechargeable batteries the cheaply made ones probably don't get anywhere near that figure.

If you managed to get your phone to charge 3x times on 1 cycle then you probably got a really good one. I've had ones that barely manage 80% on full charge.

Kenlee · 20/06/2015 15:53

Summer we just have a taxi to send her or a very understanding bro in law. The friend is afraid their DD won't cope at checkin. So are wondering do guardians provide this service and at what cost.

summerends · 20/06/2015 17:05

Oversea boarders I know just use a taxi service rather than a guardian and would use a company where the driver gets paid extra for checkin and waiting at airport as per regulations for unaccompanied minor. If your friend's DC is n't an unaccompanied minor does n't stop them using the same service. Guardians who are n't friends or family but get paid for their duties may well provide same service but I imagine it would be a similar price.

BTW instead of a professional guardian, a school friend's parent may be happy to take the role on but of course that needs time to settle in and make friends.

petitdonkey · 21/06/2015 13:57

happygardener and cheesemaker thank you so much for your detailed replies! HG - we would've loved Tonbridge but the head really said that there wasn't much chance of him getting until unless we boarded him for year 7&8 at a school that would prepare him for CE. the modified entry that Dame linked to we are a) too late for and b) DS is not academically brilliant enough to make it I think. Also, someone mentioned that it is more weekly boarding I thought it was quite the opposite - when I spoke to them (a long time ago admittedly) they didn't offer weekly boarding..

cheesemaker - you have very succinctly summed up all of our pros and cons!! BTW I'm not T's Mum but if he's the one I'm thinking of he's better than an all rounder sports boy!! He has been with my DS since reception and they were at a party together yesterday - small world internet!

happygardening · 21/06/2015 21:41

petitdonkey when I looked at Tonbridge (admittedly many years ago) the head was honest enough to say that although classified as "full boarders" most went home on Sat night for the simply reason they were allowed to. This was backed up by our prep school head and other parents. 40% were also day boys. At Kings their "full boarders" are not allowed to that is the big difference.

morethanpotatoprints · 22/06/2015 08:45

Hello all just popped in to say hello and haven't forgotten about the thread.
Having a great time running dd around to various concerts and music exams.
I won't be able to do this for much longer so cherishing the time now. Grin
Thanks for the info on the battery chargers, I have a techie niece checking them out for me.
I'm finding the guardian convo very interesting, I had no idea some people paid and there was a business for this. I presumed it was always friends and family.
Our school used to allow teachers/ members of staff to be guardians, I'm not sure if other schools do, but this isn't allowed now and it has to be someone from outside the school. This has to be the case now but such a shame it had to come to this.

OP posts:
KingscoteStaff · 22/06/2015 12:56

And today's question is about..... Music practice!

Not talking about a specialist school here, just a normal boarding school.

DD11 plays 2 instruments, which she is planning to continue at her new school. At home she practises most nights, but has to be reminded and 'facilitated' - ie I help her unpack, tune, look at the notebook and discuss what she needs to work on. The practice itself, she does on her own.

So what happens at a boarding school? Will practice rooms be timetabled to a certain child at half hour intervals in the evening? Who checks if she does her practice?

sleepingdog · 22/06/2015 13:24

Kingscote - I was you 2 years ago (and am still you with those still at home!). The biggest adjustment for boarding school is the letting go of the control over things like this. Your DD will soon learn that she needs to be self motivated and take responsibility for her practice - how it works at each school will be different re: booking rooms in school, or whether the practice rooms are in house. If she doesn't practice she'll soon feel the heat from her teachers. Don't worry about it, settling in is THE most important thing for the first 2 terms, if not year. The school will keep an eye on it all and I would encourage you to establish a good relationship with the HM and Tutor so if there are any issues you can all work together on it.

ZeroFunDame · 22/06/2015 13:41

I help her unpack, tune, look at the notebook and discuss what she needs to work on.

None of that.Grin

Rooms are timetabled (up to yr 8 ime) and I have it on good (but musically unimpressive) authority that junior staff members, stationed in the corridors, will pop their heads round the door "and shout at you" if they don't hear any playing.

You'll find out if your DC is not practising properly via irate emails from her music teacher ...

I imagine it's similar in higher years but with more onus on the child.

happygardening · 22/06/2015 16:49

"DD11"???????
KingscotteStaff I take my hat off to you if you've the time and the energy to "help her unpack, tune, lock at the notebook and discuss what she needs to work on" if you've got 10 other children. Frankly I'm not convinced I even get off my day bed to cook a meal if I was in your shoes. Grin

KingscoteStaff · 22/06/2015 21:24

Aged 11, you twit!

DarklingJane · 23/06/2015 00:46

Kingscote

PMed you

summerends · 23/06/2015 04:52

Kingscote some boarding schools don't have the availability or easy access to practise rooms or obvious times for the younger DCs to practise with timetabled practice only two to three times a week. A DC who has to walk several minutes to the music school when their friends are having fun together or still in bed may be deterred unless very self-motivated. Again for younger boarders they only play music because of parental encouragement even if they get to the practice rooms they may do minimal playing or not really know how to practice. Since your DD is young it is worth enrolling the help of the housemistress to devise a plan with your DD to fit into her timetable when she is settled in. In the meantime start by encouraging her to sort her own practice out and what she needs to work on at home, she is at the age when she is capable of doing that.

summerends · 23/06/2015 06:08

correction I meant 'Again for younger boarders ifthey only play music because of parental encouragement ...'

morethanpotatoprints · 23/06/2015 12:19

Grin at 11 kids.

I missed this post but probably would have thought the same. I can't imagine having that many, 3 have been enough.

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