HELP me find a school please!

[bearhugsmum]

Can anyone suggest schools please, I would grateful for any advice.

DS Currently in state. Has SEN problems (doesn't fit into a typical box!)and I can't continue to face the constant battle with state system.

Distance not a deal breaker, We are looking to move and the right school is our priority at the moment.

To start in year 7. I would consider prep for two years or secondary starting at 11 years.

Good amount of Weekly boarding for a community feel in the evenings and lots of activities.

DS likes learning and is motivated, has an interest in everything but is average academically so no where too selective.

Most importantly has a great SEN and pastoral care.

Farrringtons in Chislehurst, SE London / NW Kent may suit? They have great pastoral care, day or boarding, small classes, range of abilities including those who need extra support. DD attended until Y3 then outgrew school academically as was very advanced, but otherwise it was great. Goes upto 18. It's lowly position in league tables reflects the less academic aspect of the school but then that may be no surprise. Lovely grounds. Reasonably priced for a London suburb school, lovely neighbourhoods nearby to settle down in.

Thank you Petts just looking at them now

Maybe Bedales? Reputation for suiting the 'quirky' and caters for a very broad ability range.

Or Frensham Heights, cheaper than Bedales but the same holistic feel.

We know a very quirky child with SEN who was thoroughly miserable at Bedales so beware.
OP my DS1 has SEN he definitely doesn't doesn't fit the box, now yr 13 he"s been in a whole variety of school both state (mainly "high achieving ofstead outstanding") and independent from bargain basement through to top notch we've lived in five counties as well so I'm not talking about one area. Frankly my head aches from bashing it against a wall stuffed with couldn't care less jobs worth teachers from both sectors, I've had more meaningless promises than hot dinners, I've listened to so many excuses my head spins just thinking about it.
IME in both sectors there will be the very occasional teachers (2 at best through out his school career) who really understands (it's not complicated and we have a very detailed ed psych report done when he was 6) and makes an effort to help him but most couldn't care less. The major difference is that when you've got the headmasters head is some sort of head lock you push the head of a state school they will admit that they are going to ignore the recommendations in the report made by their ed psych (which they paid for) so you know where you stand, in the private sector they make lots of promises, give you lots of flannel, take your money of course, tell you that they are implementing the recommendation even when it becomes very clear that they are not, and then blame you DC when they fail to perform. In my now very extensive and very frustrated experience of this plenty recount similar stories of the independent sector.
My advise keep your money, if possible work less hours so that you can be available more for your DS and pay for as much extra help, as your DS is going to need it through out his career and don't forget caveat emptore.

Happy gardening this is what I was terrified about. Thank you for honesty.

I have taught in a few secondaries ( state and private) and I can tell you that SEN provision is very patchy. Some parents seem determined to have their DCs in main stream schools, not realising they will be, at best, totally ignored by the other pupils, and at worst, bullied. The subject teachers, myself included, are not trained in special needs, and generally are not particularly interested in teaching special needs pupils (though they won't admit that). Most do try but it is not easy when you have a whole class to deal with.

Some SEN pupils have full time TAs who spend all day with the pupil. Quite frankly, that just sets the pupil even further apart from the rest of the pupils, thereby preventing any integration. Some of the TAs are also woefully under qualified and act as bag carriers!

However the official line in schools is it all works well and SEN pupils are totally integrated!

Agree with the other posters, but as you asked for school recommendations, try St Bede's in Eastbourne which on the face of it should tick most of your boxes.

If you don't mind me asking, what kind of SEN needs does your DS have?

There's always moving to Finland I guess? Ha

Take a look at The Read School. Do not know it personally but have friends who like it. Takes a mix of those with SEN and those without. Could easily live in Leeds/Harrogate.

It doesn't sound as if your DS has these specific needs, but I have heard very good things about The Unicorn School near Abingdon in Oxfordshire, though I don't know anyone who chose it in the end for their child. Abingdon is a nice town to live in I believe and not quite as terrifyingly expensive as some of Oxfordshire as it has no train station.

Depending on the SN maybe Seaford College?

bearhugsmum I've heard very positive things about Bruern Abbey from friends, a weekly boarding prep school that goes up to 13. It is focussed on dyslexia but even if your DS does n't fit that category it might be worth an assessment there.

Thanks ladies I'm looking at all this and putting a short list together to call tomorrow.

DS has memory problems related to being prem. he will son have statement or what ever it's called now days but he can do well at school, needs 1:1 maybe once a week to consolidate what he's learnt esp close to exams but no reason he can't do well, and for his well being just a nice school that's going to be supportive, extra time in exams and not displine him for not having the correct kit etc but maybe help him find strategies to remember and be organized. I could complain and fight with the school and Ed authority but I wonder if my times better spent finding a school that has some experience of this and wants to help him successed in first place.

On the basis of what you have said could add www.pocklingtonschool.com/our-schools/pocklington-school/academic-life/teaching-support/ to your list. I went to look round for DS and it seemed every other room was 'here's where you go if you need any help with subject x/y/z'. It has a lovely feel and I know many families who are very happy with the progress of their DC. 20 mins from York.

I hope you don't mind me butting in but I have a PostGrad in SEN and would recommend a book on helping children's memory by Speechmark. I use it a lot and you could do the activities at home with him in the meantime. Best of luck op.

More House in Frensham? Specialises in boys with a variety of SEN, my friend sends her DS there and raves about it. On track to get very good GCSE results.

Bethany School in Goudhurst, Kent may be worth a look.

If your DS can get a statement wouldn't you be better giving the state sector another go?
Secondly as far as Im aware (it might have changed) statement and their associated funding are not transferable between LEA's.
Having said this Breurn Prep has a excellent reputation and I know someone with a child at Unicorn in Abbingdon they're delighted with it, I think it's only a day school but it is about to extend it's age group to 16.

PMed you back but want to also second More House in Frensham - it sounds just what you are looking for.

I have friend with two at More House, both dyslexic. There area of speciality is definitely dyslexia and processing issues. A wide range of abilities. Quite inclusive for sport so non athletic given a chance to succeed and enjoy physical activity.

What you need is a statement that names More House. Loads of statemented kids there.

You can use the isbi schools website to search for a school that specifically caters for children with dyslexia. You can search and compare schools side-by-side that meet your needs - ie. location, size, weekly or flexi-boarding, subjects taught and can also check out scholarships available, facilities, fees, number of pupils, after school clubs and loads more. I found it really helpful.