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Education

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Pre-school problem...

12 replies

ledodgyfireworksingedmyeyebrow · 03/11/2006 14:48

Sice Wednesday dd (3) has been saying she doesn't want to go to pre-school. I just assumed it was because she was off for a week because of half term and she was getting used to it again. However she has been coming home saying she doesn't like the teacher and I thought well that can't be helped. I have a friend who's dd is best friends with mine and was talking to her today and she said her dd has been exactly the same and also started acting things out in her bedroom saying things like "Naughty boys! Sit down, you are all silly boys!" when her mum asked her who said this she said no one so my friend listened outside her room and her dd was then saying to her dolls "i'm Miss... and you are all naughty" so my friend went in and asked her if that's what the teacher says and she said it was and that she tells the naughty boys off because they are playing with toys when they should be listening to her. Now i'm all for discipline but surely labelling children as 'naughty' rather than labelling their behaviour is wrong. Also once when I was picking up my dd the teacher told me she had been crying because she had a cough, I thought this was strange because she didn't have a cough and when I asked my dd she showed me that she'd cut her finger on the straw she has with her milk. I mentioned this to the teacher the next day so she knew that dd didn't have a cough and that she had cut her finger and that's why she'd been crying , she got all defensive saying "oh no it was before that" which implies she did know she cut her finger and didn't tell me. She was the same when another girls mum was questioning her about a rash her dd had and was wondering if it was the soap in school that has caused it and immediatley started to be really defensive. At the beginning of term you have to fill out a form explaining what your child can and can't do such as putting their shoes on , washing hands etc. I stated that dd can put her shoes on but always asked is this the right foot as she often gets them on the wrong way round, several times when they've done PE she has come out with her shoes on the wrong feet, I understand there are quite a few children but there is a classroom assistant as well and what's the point of filling out that form in the first place if they aren't going to check things like this. It just isn't sitting very well with me at the moment we have meet the teacher next week should I raise my concerns or am I overreacting?

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ledodgyfireworksingedmyeyebrow · 03/11/2006 14:50

hould also say that dd was hysterical as soon as she saw the teacher today and had to be dragged into nursery which in itself is destressing.

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ledodgyfireworksingedmyeyebrow · 03/11/2006 14:54

Also another boy's mum said the same thing. I am just about to pick her up now and then going straight to mil's so won't be here till later to answer any replies. TIA

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hotandbothered · 03/11/2006 14:55

I would talk to the preschool about your concerns and not necessarily wait til parents evening either.Does your lo's teacher have a boss? If so I'd be inclined to talk to them. It's not nice to have a child who doesn't want to go, when they've previously been happy , and from what you've said, your dd is not the only one. I'd write down your concerns and make sure they deal with them - any school worth their salt will take you seriously and want to find out what is going on. Hope this helps?

Orinoco · 03/11/2006 21:05

Message withdrawn

maggiesmama · 03/11/2006 21:08

i would go staright to whomever has authority. my inclination, in these situations, is that, during role play/games at home, kids dont lie. trust your instincts. and dont put your dd off school for life.

brimfull · 03/11/2006 21:28

If you feel your dd isn't settled for any reason you should approach the superviser in charge.I would mention that if there is a problem with discipline it may be affecting your dd.It may not help your dd to settle in the long term if you stay and help,but if you need to see for yourself how things work then do it.
There should be a procedure book that deals ith discipline issues available for parents to look at .Staff should not be raising their voices so it is unacceptable.
As for the shoe thing I would disregard this as unimportant,happens occassionally to my ds and it doesn't mean that your dd isn't being cared for adequately.
The cut finger should have been reported to you and entered in the accident book and signed by you

NurseyJo · 04/11/2006 10:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

ledodgyfireworksingedmyeyebrow · 04/11/2006 15:50

Ty everyone I will chase it up next week.

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TenaLady · 04/11/2006 16:25

Well, a similar incident with the finger cutting has happened to me. I didnt know he had cut his finger with a knife that they had asked him to use when cooking! Not a mention of it to me. However, he did like his teacher.

I on reflection with a few other incidents wished I had pulled ds out and placed him elsewhere. Dont get me wrong he came to no harm but I found the administration and teaching a bit sketchy.

I kept him there because of his friends I say follow your gut feeling and move her if you are not happy.

ledodgyfireworksingedmyeyebrow · 07/11/2006 13:38

She cried again going in today, she was off yesterday because she didn't feel well. Now something else has come to light when I was speaking to some other mums it turns out one boy has been hitting, punching other children (one girl was poked near the eye by him with a pencil)and being mean to them he has even hit and punched the teacher and this is why my dd and some other children have been so frightnened today when my dd saw this boy at the gate (he's normally late so this doesn't usually happen) she went white and started to cry. My friend said her dd had nearly vomited this morning because she didn't want to go in and a few others have been the same. This boy is often picked up by his older brother who used to try and smash our windows with his football so obviously some bad influences there. Apparently the teacher has been shouting at him and tbh if he's kicking her I don't really blame her. The techer's shouting is scaring some children including dd because at this age even if it is not them being told off it still frightens them. Anyway me and the other mums have decided to say something at next weeks parent's evening about the boy, the teacher's shouting and how scared our children are. Pre- school is meant to make going to school easier but this is frightening the life out of them all. I hate to think of dd and the others going through this at three and a half!

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brimfull · 07/11/2006 13:44

god ,what that little boys home life must be like
I think the poor teacher needs to change her tactic.She really shouldn't be shouting .I feel for you dd and the others,it's ruining what should be great fun.
I hope this gets sorted out for your dd.

ledodgyfireworksingedmyeyebrow · 07/11/2006 13:47

I agree , I do feel sorry for the boy as home mustn't be much fun. The teacher does need to find a better way of disciplining him as shouting is scaring everybody and obviously isn't improving his behaviour.

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