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Education

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Original poster

am sick of the education system my 13 year old has endured

25 replies

southeastastra · 08/02/2015 21:35

bloody hell, he isn't head of his class in fact he is probably the one of the failing ones. yet he is clever and remembers so many facts that are probably irrelevant to most and probably useless yet he can remember them.

the education he has received has done nothing to encourage any spark of independence or nurtured any independent thoughts he may have. it's been crap.

and it's getting worse. he is 13 and will probably leave school with crap grades thanks to michael gove's re-working of the curriculum.

i despair and wonder what the future will hold for him and get depressed when i think if only i could have afforded a private education, what would have been different.

OP posts:

Original poster

southeastastra · 08/02/2015 21:53

well thanks for your support mnetters

OP posts:

lljkk · 08/02/2015 21:57

Awww, SEA, I dunno what to say. Sorry you've had a bad time, don't think you should believe that private ed is always so great.

People who get crap GCSEs actually do go on and achieve other stuff in their lives. Sometimes great stuff. It's not the last chance for success.

Groovee · 08/02/2015 21:59

There's still time for people to reply. 18 minutes isn't long at this time of night.

If you aren't happy, I would look elsewhere. I cannot comment on the English system as we're in Scotland getting to grips with a new curriculum and examinations.

Ladymuck · 08/02/2015 22:03

Is he in year 8 or year 9? Are you sure that he is failing?

Original poster

southeastastra · 08/02/2015 22:04

lol thanks you two, it is frustrating

OP posts:

tinfoilhat · 08/02/2015 22:05

Is Home Educating an option? Can still do gcse's if he wants, or could get straight into college.

forago · 08/02/2015 22:08

my brother went to a crap state school, undiagnosed dyslexia, terrible GCSEs, no A levels. He now training to be a barrister at 30 after doing degrees while working. it can be done later.

that said it seems a bit early to give up on him getting a good education at 13, still time to turn it around before GCSEs? have you spoken to the school, can you spend some extra time helping him, can you afford a tutor?

TheFirstOfHerName · 08/02/2015 22:12

I do find the constant testing is stressful for them. In DS1 and DS2's secondary school there are over fifty tests and assessments each school year.

DS1 chose Classical Civilisation as one of his options because he had an interest in ancient Roman & Greek culture. He gets frustrated at constantly having to tailor his answers to a rigid mark scheme, and is rapidly losing motivation and interest in the subject.

His targets have all been set much higher than what he is able to achieve, so he is constantly being told he is underachieving, even when he gets As and Bs and has tried his hardest.

Lookingbeyondthestars · 08/02/2015 22:15

Op your ds sounds like mine. I've realised more and more that it's down to me to help him along.
At 9, he was starting to slip. He wasn't top of the class so didn't get pushed and not at the bottom, so didn't get extra help.
Yet he is bright. He loves facts and seems to know lots but I think that's from his own reading rather than school. I'd hate to think that at 13 that will start to be stifled!
Anyway, I've started to work with him at home using websites and workbooks.

tiggytape · 09/02/2015 08:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

granolamuncher · 09/02/2015 10:08

When I read your first three paras, OP, I thought you were complaining about a prep school education, not a state secondary.

homebythesea · 09/02/2015 12:21

What is it that you think is missing OP? I can assure you it is no different in private schools- they all take the same exams! Compared to the O levels I took I agree it's all about the jumping of hoops rather than applying knowledge independently gleaned, but that's the system we have and I think it's our duty as parents to support our DC's through it (they don't know any different system) rather than despair on their behalf. You don't really explain why your son is "likely to get crap grades" because of the "system". If you have concerns about his learning you need to be at the school talking to teachers, if he ends extra support you need to look into that and all the while encourage, encourage, encourage.

LadySybilLikesSloeGin · 09/02/2015 12:28

I went to a really crap school. I left and went to a different school a term into my A'levels, got 1 A'level as the GCSE's didn't teach the basics that I needed to do A'levels. The 1 A'level was enough to get into university to do a HND. I completed that and managed to get onto a Law degree. It was the scenic route but it can be done. Can you speak to his teachers to see what areas he needs to focus on to improve?

SconeEater · 09/02/2015 12:35

Taking the scenic route is a good way of putting it LadySybil, I shall borrow that!

LadySybilLikesSloeGin · 09/02/2015 12:39

Go for it.

Elibean · 09/02/2015 14:39

((SEA)) sounds so frustrating, and its beyond upsetting when you feel like your kids aren't being supported the way they need to be.

If its any consolation, I went to a private school and most of us (in my rebel year) left with crap GCSEs but most of us also did absolutely fine in the end.

I'm with the scenic route theory - my route was highly scenic

But are there any choices where you live? Could you re-route your ds to somewhere that might nurture his individuality?

iseenodust · 09/02/2015 15:10

Does he know about the online TED / TEDx talks? They might spark some new thoughts in him.

Another one who has taken a scenic /circuitous but very sociable route.

pinklink · 09/02/2015 22:14

Hmmmm. We are still experiencing the labour education effect. Gove's have not yet come into effect

Callooh · 09/02/2015 22:30

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Hakluyt · 11/02/2015 23:11

Could you say more about the problems you perceive? I have a 13 year old too......

TwoOddSocks · 18/02/2015 19:45

It sucks, does he have any interests outside of academia that he could get his teeth stuck into? Is he into cars? Sport? Nature? Animals? It sucks that the system is so limited and inflexible that bright students that don't fit the mould get thrown by the way side but that doesn't mean that's it for him finding a passion, it just might lie outside of the classroom.

Mistlewoeandwhine · 18/02/2015 19:51

Have you considered home educating him?

lastlines · 18/02/2015 19:56

SEA, it's very frustrating but school isn't the only source of learning or the sole opportunity to express your creativity.
I agree with the posters who say encourage him to do his real learning outside school. The one advantage of a rubbish school is that you have loads of spare energy and down time in the evenings, because you're not shattered intellectually from the challenges of the day.

Can you encourage him to do a few things outside school and set himself goals in them?
If you think he's strong as an independent thinker, get him to write letters to the papers expressing his opinions, enter essay competitions and look into public speaking too. Get him involved with a charity he cares about.

As to exams, sounds like you're onto it in time. Get hold of the course books and look online for extra info, youTube vids, bitesize etc. You can help him make sure he is on top of the work, however weak his school is.

Roseformeplease · 18/02/2015 19:56

Being able to remember facts is no longer real rewarded the way it once was, in the days of rote learning. Now it is all about Literacy and Numeracy skills.

Boost these (or help him to boost them) and he will find far more progress in most subjects.

Killasandra · 19/02/2015 17:41

Why are you blaming gove's changes? ( I mean why in particular, there are lots of different things you might be taking issue with)

How is his writing? Can he write an essay?

How is his reading? Can he read a novel? Research a topic?

And how is his maths?

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