Yr1 homwork (again!!) Dh and I are coming at this from differnet end of the spectrum.....Who is right?

[LadyTophamHatt]

ds2, 5 yr old has reading book, and 10 spellings to learn everyweek.

Spelling are new words he hasn't always read before so it's lerning to read the word and spell it at the same time.

I think it's all so wrong.
He's 5 FGS, I refuse to nag him to do it because he he finds it hard and is often yawning during the whole thing.

He quite often willingly does it of his own accord so I'll encourage him then but I just hate the whole homework thing at this age, especially so much of it.

DH wants him to do it every night and often (5/7 days a week or so) asks me if I've done his spelling or his reading or both.

He was sitting with him at the table this morning doing the spelling and ds2 was yawning every 5 minutes, was totally bored and uninterested but DH want him to carry on.

I hate it.

DS1 is very academic, top of the class in many subjuect but awful at sport, Ds2 is a genius with a ball, on his bike, with a racket, bat...whatever you name the sport and he'll play it with huge talent within a day. When it comes to maths, writing and reading he just isn't interested.

Am I right to let him relax about the HW or is DH for making him do it?
Obvously I don't want Ds2 to fall behind with his school work but at 5 yrs old every fibre in body scraems "THIS IS WRONG!!!"

happy medium maybe - you do a bit more with him, DH stops pushing so much.

Find ways of making it more fun for him - maybe do the spellings while playing ball with him ?

If dh thinks it's so important, he should do it, instead of policing you to do something that you (and many people who know even a tiny bit about how young children learn) think is inappropriate.

make it a game.

get a white board and do it on there with pictures
make silly sentences with the words
do one per day
use magnets

We always practised spellings in the car on the way to school.

I know what you mean about coming at homework from different angles. Dh and I were not happy with each other last night, as I thought it was fine for dd to watch Coronation Street and then do her prep, dh thought she should do it first. Bless her, she didn't get in from school until after 7, so deserved to chill a little.

It's so hard to know whether to push or not, and I think it comes down to the individual child.

When ds was quite young I made him sit and do his work as soon as he came in, and he still does it now. This never worked with dd, she needs to be coaxed more!

They're both a lot older than yours though - so it is pretty important.

Would he do the Look, Cover, Write method say twice during the week, perhaps 5 at a time ? We also write/test them using a Megasketcher. For ds I also used to write them up on a blackboard in his room so he could read them each evening.

I guess if they're at a school where homework's expected, you have to either choose to do it or be a formal refusenik & tell the teacher so. I don't think there's a halfway house.

If you are going to do it, then I'm sort of with your dh EXCEPT that with a reluctant homeworker you have to be extra-carefully organised about when and how you do it. Spellings at the table during the pre-school rush sound pretty miserable, and I'd do that only in the last last resort.

Instead I'd suggest a careful sorted routine that happens as much as possibly exactly the same way every day: home from school, snack, kitchen table, stuff out of link bags, decide what you do first, glass of water, encouragement, steady work, reward.

I'm with you that he is too young. This sort of pressure doesn't make kids any brighter and may even put them off academic wotk in the long term. Though reading with them at any age is a good idea. But like Bink - if that's school policy then you are a bit stumped. You can make it a game and maybe it will be routine in the end.

I have probs like this with dd. I do think for the future, it is impoirtant that she learns that homework isn't optional, so I do make her do it. We do it in small amounts though, and if she is losing interest or motivation I will jsut push for a little mroe then say we will stop after that. Then we try again another time. Whatever we can do on the go or make a game out of we do.

what is the school's approach to it? Our school approiaches learning very positively. The word 'work' is forbidden, instead they can refer to 'writing' or 'science' or such. THe homework is sent out under the heading HomeFun activities.

I wish the work "work" was forbidden too. I think they should be striving to make learning fun and something they want to do - "work" just has the wrong connotation to me.

we odnt have homework
we have home "learning"
in fact they never uyse the word work

they say " be quet in the corridor there are toher poeple trying to learn"
it sounds weird at first
the govenor comittee is called "learning and teachgn" too

mm, i think it is very important in keeping children motivated. should be banned in ALL schools.

I'm a bit like you, I think they are too young for homework. But I want dd to have a positive attitude toward school, so go along with it.

We have spelling hot spot. After looking at the words, dd stands up on a stool, I shine a torch on her (a spotlight) and we pretend she is on a TV spelling programme. I ask a couple of words each time and she spells them out. By the end of the week, we have done all the words on different days.

Agree - happy medium's the only way to go.

If you don't hear your child read regularly (or look at books together depending on the stage they're at)they are missing out and will be at a disadvantage.

If you give them the impression that it's optional you will be making a very difficult situation for yourself in a few years time.

But, Sir T-H, if you make it a boring nagging session that everybody dreads you will be doing more harm than good.

I do make sure the homework is done on time, I just hate nagging him (them) to do it.

Perhaps you could try a different way? My dd has 10 spellings a week but as most are phonically regular she does not need to learn them, she just listens for the sounds and writes them down. It is only with the few 'tricky' words that we need a strategy and we usually make that fun.

Could you try and work with phonics with your ds - it can be great fun and there are lots of different ways of doing it. My dd loves the Jolly Phonics video, and even asks to watch it, whereas my ds loves the songs which we play in the car on the way to school (and i usually end up singing them all day at work lol)

If he is secure in his phonics reading would be much easier and the spellings would only really be a few each week, much less time needed and more time to have fun!

If he is interested in sport can you find any books/ comics / journals about sport that he likes - may increase his enthusiasm for reading. Worked for my dd - we got her books about animals which she WANTED to read.

Ds is more reluctant so we 'bribe' him with a star chart and something he wants when it is full.

My dd is in year 2 and gets three ( count 'em) bits of homework a week.
It really pisses me off
She is 6 fgs!
Children should be playing when they get home, not stressing about homework.

So to answer your question, I agree with you not your dh

Gosh LTH, I don't know. I've only got ds1 in school atm - he's in yr 1 too but he's a doddle to deal with. He is very self motivated and I can tell he's going to be a girlie swot - just like I was!

I don't know what the younger two will be like so I could well be facing the same dilemma myself in a couple of years!

I'd probably be more like your dh in that I'd give it huge importance and I'd be very keen not to let them fall behind. Practicing reading and learning to spell is going to make life easier and more comfortable for them in the future. OTOH, if a child is reluctant then the way I do things with ds1 just ain't going to work (he likes to sit down and be 'tested' - god, he's his mother's son!!). Doing one a day idea is good, making things into a game or maybe even offering rewards?

I know one mum at school is using a 'necklace' with her dd - for doing things she gets a new link on this necklace thing. Another mum promises to take her ds swimming at the end of the week.

I know quite a few mums who are saying similar to you - their dc's just aren't interested and they struggle to get them to read at home or learn the spellings and, as far as I can see, they are mostly using reward systems.

OH definitely agree with using phonics - has your ds learnt to read with phonics?

Ds1 is actually just able to do his spellings without 'learning' them because most of them are quite regular and he just works it out. Some of his have been long words like 'shampoo' and 'thinking' but they are quite easy to work out. When he got 'chicken' it was just a case of teaching him about the 'k'.

ChiefSuptGobbledigook it sounds like your ds is being taught using Jolly Grammar ( I recognise the spellings lol) which is the extnsion to JP.

I love it and altho the school are not using it i have a copy and dd and i do it at weekends - she loves it too and we had a tantrum last weekend becuase i told her we should take a break and she did not want to!!!!