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Children of affluent parents

7 replies

lemonysnickett · 25/08/2006 13:50

Did anyone read a recent article in one of the sunday papers(the sunday Times I think) which talked about a new book which points out the rise in number of children from affluent abckgrounds seeking psychiatric help. More children involved in drugs and self harming etc. The author talked about the emptiness of these childrens lives...who are given every material advantage..but the immense amount of pressure applied..to be the best at everything..parents basically have lives mapped out for them ..one girl came to see a psychiatrist with sleeves pulled down over her hands..asked to show why..the girl revealed a scar..on her arm with the word 'empty'. How sad..Just wondering if anyone else had read the article ..and views as to how real this problem is.

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expatinscotland · 25/08/2006 13:51

I knew many who were affluent and fucked up.

moondog · 25/08/2006 13:53

I'd wager there are even more fucked up kids from shit poor backgrounds.

Another non story from ST methinks......

bran · 25/08/2006 14:11

Surely in those examples it's the lack of unconditional love and attention that is causing the trouble, not the affluence. I don't think it's a particularly new thing either, the emotionally stilted ex-public school man is a real cliche.

lemonysnickett · 25/08/2006 14:12

I have no doubt that's true..but only in a differnt way....resort to crime etc. Children of affluent backgrounds however have all the material wealth and advatages..compared to someone who lives on a sink estate!The article just pointed out the rise in the phenomenon..I don't really think it should be ignored...definately exists...I spent my summer in Rock and Polzeath..although the papers had blown whole thing out of proportion..some was quite shocking.

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MrsBadger · 25/08/2006 14:13

meh - I think that young people from affluent backgrounds are more aware that they can seek therapy if they want/need to - it's the less privileged kids who struggle on alone and unsupported that worry me more.

Though having said that I think the article raises a fair point. I was at an intensely academic, highly selective private girls' school where we were constantly driven to achieve and made to feel failures if we didn't, because both our parents and the school 'knew we had the potential'.

It worked brilliantly for some girls who throve on the pressure to be the best, but (leaving aside the drugs and the smoking) eating disorders, depression, self-harm, parasuicide and serious suicide attempts were rife. Of 75 girls in my upper fifth (ie GCSE year), three were sectioned.

Of course, the drive to get us all into equally high-pressure courses (medicine, law, vet med) at prestigious universities meant that for many girls the pressure didn't let up once they left school, and in some cases they're still urging themselves on to earn more, publish more, gain more prestige, to succeed.

I hope they're happier now than they were then but I seriously doubt it.

I wonder how many will become miserable, competitive Surrey-Mummys, pushing their kids through Baby French and ballet in the hope it will give them the edge over their peers that they worked so hard to gain for themselves.

MrsBadger · 25/08/2006 14:15

aha, bran hits nail on head - "lack of unconditional love and attention"

I think we thought love and attention were conditional upon success. Luckily I failed an A-level (which made me lower than the worms in the eyes of the school) and found out that my parents weren't the ogres I'd built them up in my mind to be. If I'd got that B it could all have gone so differently...

lemonysnickett · 25/08/2006 14:54

Interesting, Mrs Badger, I too went to an independant ...some of the girls there were also under a lot of pressure to achieve..highly competitive parents. I do wonder if this creates a cylce of competitve and pushy parents..as you point out early ballet, french etc. it seems that it does..

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