how to ask existing school for recommendation to new school?

[rajvilas]

My DC, in nursery now, will be going in for an assessment to leave his/her existing school in year 1 to go to, what is considered, a more academic school in the area. His/her existing school continues on but I am not convinced it is the right place for him/her in the long run.

The school where he/she is being assessed will be asking for a recommendation shortly. The question is, how do I notify his/her existing school without ruffling any feathers? I need them to write a good recommendation but fear that they won't purely because they don't want to lose children.

There is no easy way to do this, some go in and have a long chat with the Head to try and explain themselves (that's what we did) some write lovely letters, some write short letters. The outcome is the same for the schools so I don't think it really matters.

It is very unlikely and unprofessional for a school to write a bad reference or none at all, chances are it has happened to them before and they are probably used to it, children do leave schools, if they are frustrated, I doubt they would take it out on your child (though they may try and withhold some deposit!).

Good luck!

Thanks. I guess ultimately they will know that we are putting dc forward for another school and preferable to hear it from us first rather than being blindsided when they receive the request.

Hmm, now what to say!

Raj - be honest without being critical. Say your dc has had a lovely time at the school, but you feel the other school will be better for him/her in the long run. Thank the Head teacher and form teacher. Even if the school gets huffy and refuses to write a reference, your new school will have come across this before, and will have measures in place to deal with it. Pupils come and go, schools are used to it. What they don't like is parents not keeping them informed, or bitching about their school to other parents in the time before they leave. Be honest, show integrity and it should all be well.