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Original poster

Outward Bound: do they have to?

23 replies

SuiGeneris · 02/12/2013 21:21

Many threads on here seem to suggest that an outward bound/sports activity holiday is part of the prep/private primary experience. Why? Are these compulsory? Can the parents not send the children?

My boys are only small, but I don't really want them to go kayaking, abseiling and the like. Why don't schools stick to visiting castles and churches and leave the extra stuff for the parents to choose to do or not?

OP posts:

Helpyourself · 02/12/2013 21:26

I wouldn't worry about it yet! How old are your dcs and when do they do the course. Safety is so important, you can effectively discount that from your worries- assuming you're in the uk.

busylizzie76 · 02/12/2013 21:26

I work at a prep school and most of the trips that our pupils go on are academically focused but there are a couple of day trips to activity centres (yr5/6).....they love it - playing all day with their friends...I think it is a valuable experience...but if you don't want your child to do this then simply do not give permission...they will either be given work to do at home or join another class for the day.

busylizzie76 · 02/12/2013 21:27

I also went on these type of courses myself between the ages of 9-13 and had a fantastic time....windsurfing...abseiling...river rafting etc....

CMOTDibbler · 02/12/2013 21:31

Ds's school start outward bound type things in yr2. You could not send them, but the children love them, and its a really important part of them bonding as a group to do things where they have to trust each other.

FirstOnRecallDay · 02/12/2013 21:50

Outward bound trips are hugely beneficial to children and so much fun! I say this as a woman in her 20's who had to participate in one a few weeks back for team bonding purposes at new workplace, I now plan to do them more often without being forced by employers

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 02/12/2013 21:52

Why wouldn't you want them to take part in outdoor activities?

Original poster

SuiGeneris · 02/12/2013 21:55

Good to know it is possible to opt ou. I have had to do many of these things for work (building rafts, etc) and hate them. Most others in my work setting who were not British hated them too. The Brits loved them. Not sure why... Looking back now it seems to me that they were activities that rewarded sticking with the pack, while all if us non-Brits would never have got to where we were by sticking with our peers. And ironically today, those who did well in that raft-building ten years ago generally went less far than those of us who "skived".

Anyway, that was out of subject. Much relieved to hear we can opt out at the time if we want.

OP posts:

notyummy · 02/12/2013 21:57

Will your boys get no say in this? If they utterly hate the idea then maybe your plan is fair. But otherwise it really isn't.

PatriciaHolm · 02/12/2013 22:01

I hate "team building" stuff, but my kids have loved the school (and cubs) variants they have done.
It's very very different doing it with your best schoolmates to being forced to Have Fun with workmates.
Do keep an open mind - your children may never forgive you if you prevent them doing something all their mates are doing.

Permanentlyexhausted · 02/12/2013 22:02

It isn't just private schools - a lot of state primaries take children on outward bounds holidays.

You don't have to send them but they are very beneficial for most children. Great for confidence building. Because it is something they do with their peers and teachers they'll often try things they wouldn't do for their parents.

pusspusslet · 02/12/2013 22:04

Why pay for private school if you don't want your children to learn the confidence that comes from challenging themselves and conquering their fears that in outdoor pursuits? Can't help wondering whether you're trolling!

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 02/12/2013 22:05

Just because you didn't enjoy it, doesn't mean your children won't...

pusspusslet · 02/12/2013 22:05

Doh... Ignore the second "that"...

MoreThanChristmasCrackers · 02/12/2013 22:07

OP, none of our dc went on these either. They weren't interested and they clashed with other sporting activities where they played at county level or in dds case dance exam and show.
The school (state) tried to make us and the dc feel guilty about not going, but I guess this was because they thought they'd have to put them in another class for the week.
They just stayed off and had an extra school hol

Marmitelover55 · 03/12/2013 09:14

My DD1 did this for year 6 camp (state) and had a fantastic time. I believe there weed a couple of children who didn't go who stayed at school for the week helping with the younger children. I feel they really missed out and his continued for the whole term as other activities/ lessons referred back to things they had done when they were away.

SoupDragon · 03/12/2013 09:23

If your children are small, why are you worrying about this?

They may want to go when they are the right age - i hope you aren't going to put them off with your negativity. (I'd hate it too but I have always encouraged my DSs to give stuff a go!)

curlew · 03/12/2013 09:28

What will you do when (and it's pretty certain to be when, in my experience) your children want to go on the trips? Say "no, my love, I have a fun packed week of exploring the Gothic Perpendicular churches of East Anglia planned"?

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 03/12/2013 11:00

Curlew that sounds amazing, can I come?

mummytime · 03/12/2013 11:13

My children all did and loved these. And I was the one who refused to go on a similar trip when I was at school.

But OP if you are saying that Brits enjoy them because we are all crowd following, be part of the group types. Then I think you are massively missing the point. The point is to be challenged as an individual, and to learn to rely on others.

Brits probably enjoy me because we actually know that when things get tough then community and teams are best. As a teen I had some pretty awful experiences (as health and safety really wasn't considered as important as nowadays); but that I'd forge bonds with my peers. I might still resent the incompetent leaders but if I met those girls again we could still laugh and bond over it 30 years later. It's part of the national characteristic (as is sneaking off and finding a Chip shop/pub).

mimbleandlittlemy · 03/12/2013 12:50

Ooh, I can just imagine how the conversation would have gone in our household if I had told ds he couldn't go on (state school) PGL trip with kayaking and high ropes and all the rest of it and believe me it wouldn't have involved the words 'that's fine, Mummy, please take me to a castle and a National Trust tea room while the rest of the class is having the time of their lives and which they will then all talk about for the rest of the year while I have only my memories of a scone...".

Original poster

SuiGeneris · 03/12/2013 21:54

Thank you for the views. I am not sure what we will do when the children are older- I was just wondering if the trips were compulsory because everybody talks about them on here and both DH and I hate that sort of thing. But who knows, we might have enjoyed it as children (though I doubt it, I was very bookish and unadventurous).

OP posts:

HmmAnOxfordComma · 03/12/2013 22:36

"memories of a scone..."

Kenlee · 04/12/2013 00:00

Well again my dauhhter will be on her second outbound trip this year...She so enjoyed the first one that she has asked us in no uncertain terms she wishes to attend.

The Paris trip in summer is also a must....

She was born and raised in HK so I dont think its a British thing.. .I think she just likes being with her friends...

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