Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Education

Join the discussion on our Education forum.

Original poster

summer born - ready for school or should I hold him back?

16 replies

desperatehousewife · 11/07/2006 17:09

DS was 4 this weekend. He is due to start reception at a new school in september.

I'm not sure if he is ready or if I should hold him back until January.

He is very young for his year.
He is still bit clingy/cries for me sometimes when left at pre-school. (but this could be due to unsettled home life for 10 months)
This was not our first choice school, but our second choice (we are number 8 on waiting list of favourite school)

But...He would start school at same time as everyone else (ie a lot of his friends)
He woulnd't miss out on the friend forming first few weeks

But if i keep him at pre-school he can be top dog for a few months which could be good. And he is very confident and socialble and would probably fit in with other kids even in January...

Just don't know what to do for the best. Do I hold out for our first choice school and keep him back at preschool for a few months?

OP posts:
gettingthere · 11/07/2006 17:12

I've always thought that it's better to be bored at nursey than struggling to keep up at school.

alexsmum · 11/07/2006 17:17

no idea, but am worrying about same thing.my ds is an august birthday-end of as well.but our school doesn't have a january intake.

Northerner · 11/07/2006 17:20

How likely is it really that you will get yoour first choice school?

Personally I would send him, they will totally understand he is one of the youngest and not alot is expected of them in reception, it's more about being sociable and having fun.

My ds is starting in SEpt too, bit nerve wracking isn't it?

LIZS · 11/07/2006 17:21

but if all his friends have left then he may become less keen to go and get bored. Can only speak frome xperience that dd whoi turned 4 end of last august was fine in full tiem school. Complete life change for her as we moved from abroad to an area and house she didn't know , she had no friends already there and has always been a very clingy child. Yes, we had days when she had to be extracted from my arms but overall it was definitely the right thing to do. We had no option but to go full time astaright away (although she could have skipped odd afternoons ) but maybe your ds could do half days, then lunch before finally going full time. If a January start is an option make sure he wouldn't be the only one or they may overlook that he has missed stuff out. Speak to the school and his teacher for advice , they will have met the issue it before. 8 children on the waiting list is still a fair few.

gettingthere · 11/07/2006 17:21

My dd2 has her birthday at the beginning of the year. I'm giving her two years of nursery so that she'll be 51/2 when she goes to school.

Original poster
desperatehousewife · 11/07/2006 17:59

hmmm...think it's unlikley that we'll get into first choice - but i guess it's possible.

there are a couple of others being held back until January - so he woulnd't be alone. Although he doesn't yet know these kids - but we could do meet ups so they get to know each other over the next few months...?

I really don't have any worries about him going to school - i just want to make sure it's the right school and that he isn't too young at the moment. But I guess he will grow up even more over the summer hols - it's still a few months off.

Hmmmmm......

OP posts:
SoupDragon · 11/07/2006 18:04

I would send him in September. He'll still be young in the class by January as all the other children will have come on a long way in that first term. It's amazing how they grow up when they start school.

Can he do half days until he's ready for a whole long day? Personally I'd prefer that option to a later start.

Original poster
desperatehousewife · 11/07/2006 18:16

yes soupy - he can do half days until january. i think maybe you are right - the other kids will have learnt so much between sept and jan...

OP posts:
mumandlovingit · 11/07/2006 18:25

my eldest was 4 at the end of june 2005 and stated half days at scool in the september and full time i the jauary.i worried like mad that he was too young and how he wuld cope but to be truthful most reception years are like bigger nurserys and they dont expect too much in the first year.most is learning through play.my son has come on leaps and bounds and can now write his letters and read alot of words.ive no regrets for sending him and not holding him out.my other son willbe 4 this august and starts part time in september and full time in january.he is young for his age and has speech delays but i feel it will help him come out of himself once he's settled and i always feel that friendships are made in the first term and if children miss out on it it might be hard for them to fit in if they start after the others.just a thought.do what you think is right for you and your family.

singersgirl · 11/07/2006 18:32

I've got 2 August boys (just finishing Y3 and Reception) and they have both coped fine with Reception. DS2 was lucky in that this school only did half days for all children until Christmas, so he was only doing the same hours as he had been at nursery. I had the option to start him in January, but chose not to.

They do learn loads in Reception, but they also play a lot. As far as I can see, they only spend about an hour a day out of their 6 hours doing directed learning - and in bursts of 10 minutes or so.

albatros · 11/07/2006 18:59

I was in the same dilema as you,
I don't know how to link but the thread I started pros and cons of holding ...........
From this I found out that if I held DD2 back a year she would start in year 1 and miss reception so I am going to send her when she is due

NomDePlume · 11/07/2006 19:07

DHW, I can't say what is best for your DS, I can only tell you what DH & I decided is best for our DD, who like your DS, will be the youngest in her year.

DD isn't 4 until August 8th, and she starts school in September. We also had the option of delaying school another year, but chose not to. We love her nursery and will be very sad to say goodbye but we (both DH and I AND her nursery teachers) feel that she is emotionally and academically (sounds too grand, but ykwim) ready to go this year.

I also decided to get DD in in Sept rather than the following January, just so that she was a part of the class from day 1, and didn't feel left out because the majority of the class had met properly in Sept and formed friendships/bonds over those 3 months that DD was still in nursery.

Have you spoken to DS's pre-school teachers ? What do they say about his emotional readiness ?

albatros · 11/07/2006 19:07

I'm going to give it a go
No I'm not because I can't find the back slash on this stupid American keyboard set up!
However if you want to try substitute the # for a backslash and try
#link{http:www.mumsnet.com/Talk?topicid=43&threadid=186949&stamp=060703162140

NomDePlume · 11/07/2006 19:08

That's right, Albatros. So your child would be joining in Year 1, when all the other kids have known each other for a whole school year already. It may well put him/her at a social disadvantage for a little while

Mercy · 11/07/2006 19:17

Sorry have only skimmed the thread, but the dd of a friend went to nursery school in January aged 3.3, had to do another full year in nursery, got bored and became known as the 'class bully' at aged 4 . Being top dog doesn't always work.

If your ds was my child I would send him in September (they should have a settling in period anyway, often part-time to start with, and in our school this can be extended for any child who is experincing probs. The settling in period is a minimum)

Gem13 · 11/07/2006 19:27

I was concerned about my summer born DS too.

But... half of the class are June/July/August birthdays!!! There are only 8 Sept-Dec children starting full-time. DS will start full time (along with the other half of the class) at Easter.

The school only has one class entry so it's not even like they have managed this situation.

The (very experienced) teacher has said they will go especially easy on the literacy/numeracy stuff.

I'm really pleased.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page