help me add to this letter oh wise MNetters....sons bullying.

[gobbymare]

I am sorry in advance as this is a rather long letter and I would appreciate any input that you wise people think might be useful in this situation.

This letter is addressed to the head teacher.

I am writing this letter in the hope of your help as it seems I am unable to stop my sons constant bullying within your school by dealing with your staff.
my son and I feel let down by your school and staff.

My son has special needs ADHD..O.D.D..incontinance...dyslexia....tourettes.

As I'm sure u will appreciate these are difficult to live with for my son and as a result he is bullied within your school because he is different.

I have tried on many occasions to sort this out with your staff XXX and XXX to name a few.

I feel like I am getting nowhere as today my son rang me to tell me that someone had forced paper into his mouth and made him swallow so he needed me to bring in some money so he could get it out of his throat, this is the 4Th time my son has been assaulted this year alone.

Last year my son was assaulted several times and shoved into a bin.

This year he was pushed to the point that his hand had to receive medical treatment from the hospital and that led to it being bruised and swollen and he couldn`t write & also punched repeatedly in his arm during P.E which left bruises.

With all this bullying it is now affecting my sons mental health to the point he is now suffering anxiety attacks about coming to school so I kept him off and yet again we/I felt let down by your staff and school.

On the Friday when my son came home he went straight to his room and refused to speak to anyone and refused to eat his tea, due to his medication if his weight drops then so does his medication which in turn causes more problems (it is already lower than it should be) so I took him to the doctors and the outcome was anxiety attacks.
I rang the attendance office Monday to report his absence and left my number for someone to ring me to discuss this situation as I was not sending him to school due to the bullying and anxiety attacks which were giving him stomach pains. I received a call back Wednesday by XXX with an offer to come into school 3.15PM i couldn`t make it as I had just started a new job that day so rang back and explained within the hour of the previous call.

It took several phone calls and I popped in on several occasions to see what we could do, I couldn`t be seen so I asked reception to pass a message on that DS needed some work to do at home, this never got passed on.

I got to see XXX and had a chat to which he said he couldn`t really do much as it was XXX I needed to see but she was very busy, not exactly helpful.

I did get a phone call from XXX Friday tea time but it was within the time that I had said I was unable to answer the phone and gave specific times that I could be contacted 9.30-2.30 and any time after 4.30 which I thought was ample time to discuss.

I rang bk within 5 minutes of her ringing me and she was unavailable.

Monday morning I came in to see about this work and hopefully speak to someone, again no one available and no work either.

Eventually I spoke to XXX and the lady who deals with statementing and felt that they didn`t understand how this had affected my sons health and also that she knew nothing of the assaults ? and would look into it, have heard nothing back and that was over a week ago.

It seemed to me that the main issue was to get him back into school.

I was offered extra help with after school classes with his English etc but again have heard nothing back for how to do this and when I ring up to ask I get nowhere.

I have asked several times for a copy of your anti bullying policy to which I still have not received.

I had applied for a statementing for my child back in April/May this application was never made, I had a meeting with XXX and the attendance lady and chased it up again they knew nothing of it, but was reassured that they would make a referral asap.

When he started yr 8 I chased up this statementing as I felt/feel he needs additional support again no one knew nothing about it ? to give XXX his due he chased this up for me and now we are waiting on the reports to come back but the lady I seen along with XXX said statementing was hard to get and that they are stopping them anyway and she doubts my son would qualify.

The only plan of action was the same one that didnt work several times before which was to put my son in inclusion and slowly integrate him back into his classes slowly and if this didnt work to change classes was an option, as I can see this clearly isnt working and would like to request an appointment with yourself because this isnt acceptable and cannot go on & feel for a technology college to miss this much communication & rated outstanding by ofsted is rather a let down in my opinion.

Thank you for reading anything else I could add ?

Hi OP, I've reported this to MN as it contains real names of teachers, which I think is probably a very bad idea (unless you've included false names).

May I suggest you re-post without real life links.

Or maybe, if you report your own thread, they can amend the post - not sure if they can do that or not.

I cut and pasted the letter hence forgetting the real names

Don't worry - if you report your post to HQ they can amend the names.

Thank you I`ve reported it too

Having now read it, I'd suggest you might want to copy it to the chair of governors, and maybe include some steps / actions you'd like implemented, including meeting with relevant teachers / head / senco, anything on statementing, a clear plan of how the bullying is going to be tackled and how your son is going to be supported.

I'd also consider saying that if he gets assaulted again, especially as he's needed medical attention in the past, that you would be prepared to involve the police. They really aren't doing well on their duty of care towards him for that to be happening.

Hope he's ok.

Thank you OddSockMonster I have put in your point of contacting the police should he get assaulted again.
I have also said that a copy of this letter will also be going to the chair of governors.

Hi,

Just to let you know that we've been asked to move this.

MNHQ.

OK, firstly, I'm sorry that your son is going through this, and the school definitely need to step up.

But as for the letter, it's very difficult to read, and a bit all over the place. The sentences are long and rambling, and poor grammar and spelling. I know it's you are not at school, so please don't think I'm being critical, but when it comes to wanting to be taken seriously, a well worded and grammatically correct letter is a big start. Pretty please, no txt speak.

You should start by writing down the exact dates and times that things are occurring in chronological order eg:

4 February 2013 - Son was pushed in to a bin by student identified as Xxxxx. Son received bruising to arms. Reported to Mrs Xxxxxx at approximately x:xxpm. No action taken by the school.

And so on, so that you are building up a time line of events.

Then you need to set out your son's needs in very clear dot points:

• Son requires Xxxxxxx due to xxxxxxxxxxxxx. This can be facilitated through ......

Then outline very clearly what you expect from the school:

• I would like a meeting on date at time. I would expect that the head teacher, special needs coordinator, form teacher, xxxxx, to attend this meeting in order to put in place strategies moving foward to ensure that he receives the education that he is legally entitled to.

Set out a date that you expect a formal response in writing (usually allow 7 clear days after they receive the letter).

I wish you the best of luck.

I agree with the above - it is too hard to read. Think of it as a business report or court evidence.

You need a brief summer letter with some appendices.

Dear Head and Chair of Governors,

I am writing to seek an urgent resolution to the severe bullying my son has been encountering for an extended period.

As this is an ongoing issue, I have outlined the incidents and contacts to date in the following three appendices:

• my son's personal issues (for background only)
• a diary of bullying incidents
• a diary of contacts with the school (including resolutions, actions and any results)

As you will see, a solution has not yet been found and the situation is increasing in gravity and urgency.

I trust you will contact me before the end of half-term (Friday 24 October) to schedule a meeting to discuss this with all relevant parties when school recommences. I am available on xx, xx or xxx from 1 pm - 3 pm.

I anticipate the relevant parties to include at a minimum, the head teacher, special needs coordinator, safeguarding officer, form teacher and xxxxx. After this meeting, I would expect a written outline of agreed points within seven working days.

Kind Regards,
Mrs Mare