I found this thread years ago and every so often I check in on it, out of curiosity. My child attended the Gower School for several years. Eventually we chose to move them, for many of the reasons spelled out by other posters. If you're reading this and wondering, "Could this all be true?" I can confirm that everything in this thread reflects the experience we also had at the school.
-- I felt like I had taken on another full time job with the expectations that the school places on parents. You'll be required to provide snack for the class 1-2 times a month, bring a plant for the classroom once a term, and there are more dress up days and special activities (music festival, swim gala, etc) than I could count during the school year. Events are often during work hours (don't they realise we have jobs?) and attendance was mandatory. I don't know I can even communicate the level of stress that all of this added to our lives - I found it very difficult to manage as a working parent.
-- School communication is often poor. I do think they are trying to improve it, but I found it overwhelming at times - trying to remember where I had seen specific information was a dance I did weekly. Was it in the newsletter, an email, in the messaging app? It was hard to manage. And sometimes, major events were not communicated at all - one year, our child's teacher was changed days prior to school starting and the school didn't even think it was necessary to let the parents know at all.
-- The school is not really a Montessori school, I found. Starting in year 1, everyone does the same lessons and same class work. There is a lot of pressure to do well academically, more than felt healthy during younger years. And the level of homework is unacceptable. I remember in year 3, trying to complete hours of homework, sitting with my child and thinking, WHY?
-- The expectations on small children are sometimes ridiculous. At 7, my child was assigned an oral presentation that was supposed to be 15 minutes long. I don't know many 7 year olds that can put together and then present a 15 minute long presentation. What that means is that you as a parent will end up doing this work so that your child can complete the assignment. Later that year, my child was also expected to write a book, on their own. Guess who ended up doing that assignment too.
-- Beginning in Year 4, and then moving into Year 5, the school is basically focused on 11+ training. A lot of class time is used for prepping your child to do well on the 11+ test and your child will do practice tests during class time. If you care about that and want that for your child, perhaps this is what you want to hear - but for us, it was excessive. At 9-10 years old, school should not be about practicing to take a test.
-- If your child has any additional needs, or isn't the star student in the class, be prepared for lots of feedback about how they don't measure up. I didn't get very much positive feedback about my child until we moved schools. It was also common that teachers across the school wouldn't have any information about my child's needs, even though we had a support plan in place. Many seemed not to have any training at all in this area.
About the head specifically:
-- In contrast with the heads of other schools that I've met, I found that Ms Gowers most often was cold and unfriendly. She could be nice over a Zoom call, but every time I saw her in person it was almost as if she would have rather done anything else than say hello to me in the morning. It is possible that she's different with those that she likes, as I don't think we ever measured up in her eyes.
-- In earlier years, expect that your child and YOU will get lessons on parenting with topics like acceptable manners, such as which words are not ok to use ("literally" was on the list). It felt random and more like a list of things that Ms Gowers personally didn't like. If you want someone to tell you how to live, she is happy to do that, I found.
-- It often seemed to me that the expectations placed upon children at TGS were in not aligned with their development. Almost as if she expects perfect behaviour from miniature little adults who happen to be in her care. If your child cannot fall in line, you'll likely not fit in long term.
-- When I mentioned at a meeting with Ms Gowers that we planned on helping our child continue their learning in the summer (as a result of yet another meeting where we were told they were not quite where they should be), she told me that I shouldn't do that, because I might not teach them the right way - or the way they teach at TGS, I assume. I felt ok ignoring this suggestion, it seemed way out of line.
-- Once a year, the school holds a music festival, and Ms Gowers invites a man into the school (can't remember his name but he is lovely) to give feedback to each child after they perform. This man is charming and gives feedback to the children in a way that makes them smile. It is largely positive. After he gives his feedback, Ms Gowers also chooses to do the same. I attended the music festival several years in a row and witnessed her giving often harsh and critical feedback, and personally saw her crush several children with her criticism in front of all of their friends and an entire audience of parents. Pointing out all the flaws of an 8 year old's performance, after you forced them to attend and play in a music festival (it's mandatory, don't forget) is a very special kind of punishment.
I could go on, but won't. While there were a few bright spots - the parents and children are lovely, and there was one really great teacher in there for us during our time - I don't think it was enough to outweigh the stress that TGS brought into our lives.
We eventually chose to move our child to another school nearby for the remainder of their primary years and it made such a difference. They thrived at the new school, made new friends, teachers had glowing feedback and about four months into the new school, my child said to me, "I like school!" which is not something I ever thought I would hear. It was very difficult to make the move, especially since my child had such lovely friends, but I have never regretted it, only regretted that we didn't do it sooner. Once we got out of TGS, it felt like our lives came back into balance.