So Eton, everything I expected and more

[JoanBias]

My DS is at a private school, so I have experience of private schooling, but my word Eton was like another world.

Not just the school, but the people there.

There was one prep school being shown around, all in tweed jackets, and to a boy the spitting image of Draco Malfoy (well there was one Chinese boy, but otherwise....).

One of the mothers doing the tour was not quite right in some respect, I'm not sure how but something wasn't wired up correctly or something. She was immacuately dressed, 6-inch heels (pretty daft considering the confirmation letter warns about having a long walk), but she was just bizarre. The admissions tutor said 'we have a waiting list of 80 boys and typically 35% of these will make it through', and she asked afterwards 'so 80% of the boys from the waiting list make it through?', and it was then explained again, but you could kind of hear the cogs going round and she clearly didn't get it. She had asked several other similar questions; e.g., it was explained that some Houses are catering and others go to a central cafeteria, so she then asked 'so they all eat in the cafeteria'? She pointed at the Fives Court and asked me 'what do they play here?' I said 'Fives' 'Is it squash?', she said. 'No, Eton Fives.' 'So is it squash?' It seemed as if this woman had had the benefit of the 'Finishing School for the Terminally Dim', because she was otherwise every inch the presentable upper middle-class wife.

Another family had a son who looked the prototypical pre-Etonian, and sure enough Daddy spent the tour braying on about his House when he had been there.

The facilities were extremely impressive, although they didn't bother to show us any of the academic parts, and basically the impression was 'if your son is incredibly pushy and self-motivated, send him here and we will teach him to be entitled'. They said 'every year we reject about a third of the highest performers on the test', essentially because they aren't pushy enough. (The House Mistresses seemed quite nice though.)

Fantastic training for future managing directors and whatever, but not for us.....

Well worth it to sign up for a tour, very illuminating. They take about 100 a day from what I can see, so obligation at all....

I agree with TheOriginalSteamingNit and wouldn't have found it funny.

appalling behaviour
A bit hard come on lighten up 13 yr olds having a bit of fun and not really thinking about the consequences how many 13yr olds have not done that? I too would have seen the funny side in it.

I dare say they would-but I would keep quiet about it having moved on.I expect the prep school teacher was merely irritated.

Sorry-having moved on from being 13yrs.

Sorry but my son (and the friends of his that I have met) when aged 13 or any age would not have found that funny nor appropriate, I mean, how juvenile and unsophisticated can you get? Talk about retro 70's 'humour'

How very obnoxious.

As 13 year old my brothers and I also had fun. But without making silly phone calls and being casually racist.

And if we had, my parents would have been livid, genuinely livid. No trying to keep a straight face.

Ok so maybe its "juvenile and unsophisticated" but then who says 13 yrs old have got to be grown up and sophisticated and I can think of and in fact know plenty of worse crimes that 13 yr olds can get up too.

That doesn't make it ok, Happy that they could have done far worse. And it is juvenile for a 13 year old to behave like this. Truly it is.

At least Eton came down on it like a ton of bricks and hopefully they won't do it again. I doubt the ones giving the punishment 'struggled to keep a straight face'.

But mignonotte 13 yrs are juveniles according to the definition of the word: not fully grown or developed, young.
"I doubt the ones giving the punishment 'struggled to keep a straight face"
exotic you might be surprised my friend a head at top grammar had to tell off a boy who behaved in a "juvenile way" in chapel he thought the boys crime was very amusing (apparently livened up a very dry service) but managed to keep a straight face!

It is still behaviour juvenile for age just as messing with food at the table would be for a 6 yr old or being unable to recognise at 13 that malicious prank calls are not a decent, moral way to behave. And in criminal terms, a 13 year old would be regarded by the police to be capable of and old enough to recognise this.

I would hope the punishment might be to try and open up their minds to Chinese culture or make them read Timothy Mo's Sour Sweet so they understand the truth behind their stereotypes rather than the teachers and parents struggling to keep a straight face..............

I would be very disappointed if either of mine did that, or had done that, at thirteen or any other age. It was malicious, since they did it to a man they don't like, and it was racist.

And happy, I remember you quizzing me for ages on whether my daughter w truly a decent person or whether you could be a horrid old bigot and still go to state school. Did I discuss the news with her, did she hate immigrants, does she give money to the homeless.... Mustn't rest on my lefty laurels just because she goes to state school, must I?

And yet when you hear of a public schoolboy behaving in this way, and his mother finding it amusing, you come over all forgiving of youthful high jinks and a bit of funny racism? Seems illogical and unfair.

Im not sure from peternas's posting (perhaps he will come back and enlighten us) that the teacher they called was Chinese I think they impersonated a Chinese take away I think it was more to do with saying his £80 take away was ready!
Anyway IMO its not a crime against humanity just a couple of 13 yrs old mucking around I doubt there was any racist intent.

No, I don't think it matters whether the person they were calling was Chinese. It's the take of 'Chinglish' and funny voices that's frankly rather off. It is also pretty malevolent and unpleasant, either way.

I think it is a bit harsh to call 13 year old boys racist. It was clearly ill thought out but just a prank. I tend to think that these little slips at least give you an opening to broach the subject of race and equality. I tend to wait until I have an opportunity to discuss these things with my children. I wouldn't start a lecture on equality over breakfast or start a chat about sex and relationships casually in the middle of something else. Children learn by testing the boundaries. If a child is too well behaved there is a problem & probably lacks intelligence.

DS1 would love Eton, he can argue about anything. He also does a brilliant Indian accent, he does a convincing Gerry Adams & very funny Sean Connery. Is he racist?

'talk' of, not 'take' sorry!

I don't find funny Indian and Chinese accents amusing, sorry, and wouldn't be happy for my girls to be doing them. Impersonating someone famous is one thing, but doing Funny Foreigner voices indicative of a pretty dodgy attitude, IMO.

But here's where people get obtuse, I find.

Having reread *peternas's posting he used the words "Chinglish" they may have mocked the pronunciation but people mock mine and I don't accuse them of being classest I dont go rushing off to personnel or what ever they call themselves this week and complain. I can see the funny side in it! My husband teases some of his staff for their regional accents and they take it in good humour and they in term tease him for being RP again not classest or regionalist. He also regular works on building sites in London and does fab impersonations of blacks, Poles Indians to their faces and lets not forget the fantastic true south London accent and they mimic him again no one is offended they don't see it as racism just a bit if fun lightening up a hard day. My DH respects and works along side people from al over the world he treats everyone who works for him and with him in a thoroughly decent way they respect him and know that his has not got a racist bone in his body so a bit of teasing about accents is water off a ducks back. Seems to me its PC gone mad.

House!

We seem to have gone mad and lost our humour. We not only refrain from a bit of teasing but we have lost the ability to laugh at ourselves.

I am certainly not racist and neither is DS, I am a leftie and if I had my way I would do away with all national boarders. I'm in favour of doing away with all forms of class and race discrimination and I think the pc speech brigade do a brilliant job on keeping people in their places. How we speak effects how we think as much as the other way around. It actually stops people from questioning. PC speech is passed on as accepted wisdom never to be questioned and it will eventually close down all forms of descent.

happygardening I agree with MiniTheMinx that when children come out with this sort of humour it is a chance to discuss the issues, what I find concerning is that a parent would find it funny and proudly recount it on a public forum. It should be a source of concern and shame not pride. It's wasn't even witty or funny quite apart from the attitudes manifested!

I know my DDs take the piss out of their Chinese friends and vice versa but they do it out of respect and a knowledge of their culture, not ignorance.

Mind you the Chinese are the most racist race on earth (see Frank Dikotters first book The Discourse of Race in Modern China) and when they refer to teh Jardine's building in Hong Kong as "The House of a Thousand Arseholes" they probably include quite a few OEs.

"but doing Funny Foreigner voices indicative of a pretty dodgy attitude,"
So TOSN how should I respond to those who impersonate my funny voice some of whom are not UK citizens. Have I missed something here? I thought it was just a bit of fun they did it becasue they like me and are having a bit of a joke at work in what can often be an exceedingly stressful environment. Perhaps your right they do have a dodgy attitude I shall rush of to "manpower services" in the morning and put in a formal complaint or is it OK to mock the voice or someone who speaks "proper" but not to mock the those from other countries.

But it wasn't a bit of fun because they liked the prep school teacher, was it? Would reply at more length but about to go out,