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Original poster

My DS arghhhh

26 replies

Losingitall · 10/07/2012 07:50

Has been excluded from school for a day for having a mobile phone in school.

Now I accept it's the school rule and fully support that.

I don't see however that "a day off school" as punishment!

I've grounded him taken his phone off him etc

He's been given 2 relatively easy pieces of homework to do today. I'll be at work and will need to take the sky viewing card laptop and PS3 to work with me.

Why why why!

Why not give him a month of detentions and make him pick litter up at school or something?

He's 14

OP posts:
noblegiraffe · 10/07/2012 09:48

Make it a day of punishment for him then. A list of chores as long as your arm.

50shadesofstress · 10/07/2012 10:39

This does not really sound like a punishment that fits the crime. We used to go into a 'withdrawl' room for doing stuff like that. It was crap as only a few children in there with you so not with your friends and TBH you didn't want to do that too often!

adeucalione · 10/07/2012 15:29

I agree with noblegiraffe - it's only a punishment if you support the school by making it so.

HighNoon · 10/07/2012 18:47

This is why I don't think exclusions are an effective punishment in certain cases - including having a mobile phone.

Yes exclude if the situation needs tempers to cool, or there is an urgent and pressing reason to separate people from each other.

No for non-violent contraventions of rules including this one - because who is being inconvenienced in this case? Not the son who has been given two easy pieces of work to do (as happens in my DCs schools too). More like the OP who may want to add more schoolwork to that list, who has to ensure other temptations are out of the way, and who will have to attend the reinstatement meeting at school. Also the teacher who is legally required to mark those easy pieces of work, the senior member of staff who has to lead the reinstatement meeting at school, and the admin staff who has to log this in the management system.

I agree with OP - make the child pay directly through detentions or menial jobs round the school. It punishes the right person, justice is served promptly and proportionately, and education not affected.

I've become a reluctant expert of discipline policies Grin. Support the school yes - support ineffective policies punishing the wrong people, hmm Hmm

50shadesofstress · 11/07/2012 09:03

I am shocked that someone would be excluded for having a mobile phone at school, like Highnoon said surely it is more for violent/dangerous behaviour or persistant bad behaviour and disruption at school.

Was this the first time he had been in trouble?

noddyholder · 11/07/2012 09:06

Ridiculous. They could have taken the phone forthe day. If anything happens to him while he is at home who will be responsible? How do they know he is ok at home alone etc Really bad rule

Original poster
Losingitall · 11/07/2012 11:21

Been for his reinstatement meeting today. He's not been in trouble before. Liost credits and the odd detention for not handing homework in or not having his shirt tucked in etc

He's in the gifted and talented scheme captain of the football team handball team and athletic team.

School rule - phone at school = 1 day exclusion.

He's a bit lazy and disorganised but never any trouble for violence disobedience etc.

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Original poster
Losingitall · 11/07/2012 11:21

Sent too soon - so what they do with the proper bad uns God only knows!

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50shadesofstress · 11/07/2012 11:33

Is it a private school? I know the rules tend to be a bit stricter. At my state secondary you may have got a detention for throwing something at a teacher or something but it would have to be really awful to get excluded (that is actually quite awful but not bad enough at that school)! I think they were happy if you just turned up TBH!!!

Original poster
Losingitall · 11/07/2012 11:35

No it's the secondary school I went to.

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50shadesofstress · 11/07/2012 11:36

Sounds very OTT. Well I am guessing he won't do that again anyway!

Original poster
Losingitall · 11/07/2012 11:40

I don't have many issues with how strict it is.

They are locked in in arrival not allowed to leave during the day.

Have a system for wrongdoing Lost Credit/detention 20 mins/detention 40 mins/report. For the extreme cases they get moved to another school for 6 weeks.

My DS like I said is bright sporty but lazy.

He's a nice lad usually.

No issue with the no phone rule but automatic exclusion doesn't seem the right sanction.

His head of year who I saw this morning was perhaps more sympathetic than she should have been but it's the head teachers rule and she excluded him (tho did leave me a note that she was very pleased with my DS response and maturity at the exclusion meeting)

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slug · 11/07/2012 12:00

Can I just say as someone who taught for a long time, mobile phones in schools are the devils work.

Apart from the disruption they cause in class, the opportunity they provide for coordinated mischief making and the opportunities they provide for bullying. The mere presence of them on campus is enough to be the focus of fights, theft and damage. If you've ever had to deal with the histrionics and hysterics of trying to part a mobile phone from the unwilling fingers of a 16 year old boy then you will understand the school's position on this one.

noblegiraffe · 11/07/2012 12:11

Actually, a day's exclusion is probably the sort of sanction needed to ensure the mobile rule is followed. Anything less and the kids would flout it. Other schools confiscate phones for the rest of term with parents having to collect it, but parents complain about that one because little Johnny needs his phone to be safe. An exclusion probably causes less whinging.

AdventuresWithVoles · 11/07/2012 12:37

If he lacks phone & Internet access he'll be cut off from his social life which is a painful punishment for many teens.
I think it's a stupid thing to impose an external exclusion over, though, personally, so wouldn't do any more than you already plan to do.

legally he's not allowed to be in public places during school hours, too

50shadesofstress · 11/07/2012 12:56

Good point slug

outtolunchagain · 11/07/2012 13:11

I have to admit that this does seem a bit of an over reaction.At ds schools phones are allowed but not to be used in lessons obviously .Just asked ds who says no trouble because it's just assumed you have them ,phones are no big deal.Occasionally they get taken away for a reason but can be picked up from reception at the end of the day.It is a rural school though where children travel long distances and phones while of course not essential are a useful tool.

mummytime · 11/07/2012 13:17

Well my DCs school does not ban mobiles (kids do have to travel long distances, lots on the countryside) but does ban their use during the school day. It also strictly enforces the "if they are seen in class they are confiscated rule", and they can only be redeemed by a parent going in to get the phone. I also have heard of no fights etc. over the phones, but then again if there were the phones would be removed. If a 16 year old refused they would be heading towards an exclusion.

Exclusion just for having a mobile seems silly. Even though I have worked in another school and seen the consequences of not strictly enforcing mobile rules.

SoupDragon · 11/07/2012 14:01

I thought the OP supports the mobile phone ban, it's the exclusion she thinks is stupid.

i agree - something at school would be more appropriate. Litter-picking every break for a set period seems perfect.

Original poster
Losingitall · 11/07/2012 14:15

I do completely support it.

Just think the image of "a day off" isn't proper punishment.

As I said litter picking and weekly detention for a month would be more of a deterrent.

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lemonpie7 · 20/07/2012 17:49

I can't manage without mobile phones in class. For a lot of Btec work we are supposed to take photos, so if th echilden didn't have camera phones we would need over a hundred digital cameras available in the departments. Most of our children don't speek English, so if they didn't have phones with translaters on we would need dictionaries in about 40 languages in each class room. Also most have electronic versions of text books, ao they are not carrying so much about.And I text the homework to the whole class, including absentee, and any parents who want to be in the loop. And they all have instant internet access for research. A school near us issued every pupil with an Ipad.

pointythings · 20/07/2012 19:13

At the school DD1 starts in September mobile phones must be kept in lockers and turned off during school hours but they aren't banned. I think that is a sensible compromise - with so many working parents and complicated transport arrangements around these days, children need a way of keeping in touch with their parents. Emergency calls through school admin don't always do the job.

That said, although I will be getting DD1 a phone for September, it will NOT have a camera on it.

TalkinPeace2 · 20/07/2012 19:29

Losingit
DS had a "home day" shall we say a while back.
I knew it was brewing, but one of the actual two events (it has since been admitted to me) did not happen.
So he was excluded under false pretences
BUT
HOLY SHIT it made a difference to the cohort.
All the problems I was pissed off about evaporated as peer pressure came to bear.
I've had a tacit semi admission that he was used as the scapegoat as he was bright enough to rise above it and stay good so it would not go into the onward record.
I was MEGA hacked that it happened.
BUT in the big scheme of things it worked.
Make it work for you.
Explain to your DS that he was the example because they knew he was clever enough to cope.
All for the good.

NoComet · 23/07/2012 12:25

DDs school gives detention for forgetting to turn your phone off in lessons.
Exclusion seems way OTT unless it's a third offence or he's not turned up to detention.

Automatic punishments, given to generally well behaved DC cause huge resentment and lose the school support amongst both the kind of pupils and parents who ought to be on their side.

Original poster
Losingitall · 23/07/2012 16:25

Thanks all. He took his punishment did his homework cleaned the house and has just been given his phone back. It's an automatic exclusion no previous for phone.

He went straight in report also.

Day after he win 3 golds at sports day his form won he was chosen to collect the trophy.

Day after that he was given two awards in the yr end assembly: contribution to sports and athletics and a national maths prize.

He's so bloody infuriating!!!!

I know that sounds like a stealth thingy it isn't meant to its to illustrate the conflict!

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