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Original poster

are you 'friends' on FB with any of your DC's teachers?

24 replies

PavlovtheCat · 16/05/2012 19:32

not those who are actually your friends, but those who you know in parent/teacher capacity.

I am not myself, and it makes me feel a bit uneasy, the thought of being able to see what they do outside of school and vice versa, and this is why I won't do it, not sure it feels very professional, especially as some of DDs teachers are quite young.

But, it seems that several parents of DDs school friends, with whom i am friends with so are also FB friends, are friends with a couple of the teachers on FB. Now, one person i understand this, as she is secretary of the PTA and one of the teachers is quite active themselves. So that makes sense. but, not the others.

For those who are fb friends, what do you get from it? I am interested to see if I have got it all wrong and there is a good point to it all.

OP posts:

bibbitybobbitybunny · 16/05/2012 19:34

No, I think its truly strange, but several of my friends and fofs are.

Firawla · 16/05/2012 19:37

I didn't think it was allowed! Or is that just about being friends with the actual students. I would find it a bit weird to be friends with teachers on fb - its unprofessional

meditrina · 16/05/2012 19:42

SIL is a teacher, and her school has a ban on teachers accepting their parents as friends. Not sure whether/how they police it, but I know SIL thinks it is the right approach to separate professional from personal/private.

BerryCheesecake · 16/05/2012 19:44

We are not allowed to accept friend requests from parents! We are also not allowed to accept friend requests from children ( even if they've left the school etc) which I think is a good thing as I wouldn't want any parents or ex pupils to have access to my private life!

Original poster

PavlovtheCat · 16/05/2012 19:46

berry what age group is that? DD is in primary school, I wondered if that made a difference in some way perhaps?

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dearprudence · 16/05/2012 19:48

good god, no.

cricketballs · 16/05/2012 19:48

I have accepted ex-parents and ex-students but I have my settings so they are in a group with no access to information/photos etc. They use it for information/questions about references, qualifications, applications etc (especially since that school has since closed and they have no other means of asking these questions)

PinkChampagneandStrawberries · 16/05/2012 19:50

No i wouldn't add them I am only interested in their professional lives not personal stuff. One of the teachers at my DS's school is friends with some parents (not me i declined her) and some ex pupils (13/14 year old who have moved to a different school) but she was writing highly inappropriate things on it and someone complained and she deleted a lot if them but not everybody so I think it won't be long before something happens again.

BerryCheesecake · 16/05/2012 19:50

I am primary Pavlov and believe it or not I had a year 4 pupil try to add last year! We had to inform the head and log it as a safe guarding concern as the child was too young to have Facebook!

Coconutty · 16/05/2012 19:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DrSeuss · 16/05/2012 19:56

No way do I want kids and their parents checking out my FB page! Was told be cyber expert type who gave a talk at school not to but would never dream of it. A dance teacher I know runs two pages, one being the dance school page, the other her own. Is it possible they do this?

HillyWallaby · 16/05/2012 19:57

No! Who on earth does this?! It sounds weird and unprofessional to me.

BeingFluffy · 16/05/2012 20:02

Totally inappropriate. Wasn't a teacher sacked for stuff she posted on FB?

I know at least one of my DC friends has spent ages stalking particular teachers online to try and rake up some dirt. I would urge teachers to make sure their Twitter accounts are not on public display as well. Children at one of my DC's schools found all sorts of personal comments relating to a teacher's sexual preferences which they broadcast around the school - the poor teacher seems oblivious. Also they found pictures of a "drunk" teacher which provided them with much entertainment - the poor guy looked like he was just having a night out with some friends.

sybilfaulty · 16/05/2012 20:02

At one point, my FB settings went wild and invited everyone in my address book to be friends, including the teachers, the head, the TAs and many of the parents! I had to send a "please ignore the invitation" email very sharply.

I would not think it is appropriate to be FB friends with parents. I want my kids' teachers to be able to post freely without worrying what parents might think (and I would want to do the same, not that I really post much on FB!) It blurs the line between private and professional, IMO>

Original poster

PavlovtheCat · 16/05/2012 20:04

drSeus I don't think so, well I guess it is possible for some. It is possible also I guess that settings are set to a minimal group, but they came up as 'suggested friends' in my FB corner, and the photo of one of them was quite glam/going out for the night with mates and posing type photo, so doubt that was a specific dance page or similar.

DDs dance teacher has a FB page, for her dance class, which has info on classes/prices/changes to schedules/award dates etc. But it is obvious it is a professional page related to dancing.

OP posts:

Original poster

PavlovtheCat · 16/05/2012 20:05

Its not like they need to use fb to contact these teachers. The school website has a good communication system for liasion between teachers and parents, there is an email address and regular contact can be made directly through this if its info that cannot wait until we see the teacher at school.

OP posts:

Original poster

PavlovtheCat · 16/05/2012 20:06

I am glad that I am not the only one who was by seeing it.

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conorsrockers · 16/05/2012 20:09

But how about if the teacher has DC that are in classes with your children, they are best friends and she has consequently become a good friend? For Example, our Head's wife is a teacher/parent in the school and is on many parent's FB..... does that sound weird??

Original poster

PavlovtheCat · 16/05/2012 20:13

conors I did say in my OP, other than those teachers who are friends with the parents anyway. Of course in some schools, esp in small areas, children's teachers may well be good friends with the parents. I was specific about those with no relationship other than parent/teacher relationship.

OP posts:

doormat · 16/05/2012 20:13

i am friends with all of ds 5 teachers from when he was in primary...once he went to high school they all added me on fb to keep in touch...we still do 4 yrs on and it is lovely...

when i ws a nursery nurse i would have parents of my keychildren add me....they still have me on fb...i dont mind as i feel abit differently...i think it is quite nice for the parents to see that i am not out clubbing or getting drunk...and also i like to see the photos of the little ones i have cared for, watch them grow up into independant little individuals, going to school etc....i have nothing to hide so if they want to add me, it is their choice....x

MoaningMinnieRisesAgain · 16/05/2012 20:21

No, I wouldn't add them and I would be surprised if they added me. But I do have the manager of the preschool we use, because we have got to know each other and are actual RL friends.

I have no interest in adding lots of people I hardly know I see people with 600 friends and think you can't know many of these people

conorsrockers · 16/05/2012 20:31

sorry pavlov, I'll close the door behind me

Metabilis3 · 16/05/2012 22:27

I am FB friends with one of DD1's teachers, who I have known since DD1 was 1 year old - we were parents together at nursery. This friend is also involved in music and theatre things which my DCs do outside school, So I suppose that's OK. I am also FB friends with the sister of one of the teachers at DD2's school (and she is the deputy head, too). Which is weird, since I often see photos of her on nights out with her sister. I didn't know that she was my friend's sister, until I saw her dressed up in a photo of some fundraising event they had done at the gym. I have not friended the teacher, and would not do so (although I like her well enough). I am proper friends, outside school, with DD2's head teacher but she isn't on FB. Very wise, I reckon.

DrSeuss · 17/05/2012 18:25

I am a teacher at a large 11-16 school and am friends with most of the staff there. I shudder to think of the kids and their parents having access to some of the stuff we pass to each other and the comments made! But why shouldn't we do that, sending photos of our group nights out and making rude comments to each other? We are teachers at school and when we can be seen in public places such as a supermarket we behave appropriately so as not to bring the school into disrepute. However, on a night out two towns away, what we do is up to us. No way would we want parents to see it!

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