Indepedent School Virgin Seeking Independent School

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Help! We're 'abroad' at the moment and just found out we're coming back to London next year, just in time for the start of the new school year. DCs will be entering Year 5 and Year 2. We don't have an address yet, but could move anywhere in London and the commuter belt. Our odds of getting into a good state school, given that we can't even apply without an address, are next to zero.

So, the company has said it will pay for an independent school. I know nothing about the independent sector, and had not even considered it until yesterday. The DC have had a freewheeling, carefree sort of education up to now. (Heavy on the carefree, light on the education). They do speak foreign, though, and very well.

I would like to find an independent school that offers boarding (though they will not board until several years from now), is as inclusive and multicultural as possible, coed, and offers a good education that fosters creativity and freethinking. Hmmm, maybe like an independent school for future Guardian readers! Lentil-weaving optional.

I have no idea what I need (prep? what are they prepping for anyway?) or where to look. Do they need to pass exams to get into Years 2 & 5? If so, what exams? I'm worried about exams!!!

Please help me. Point me to some schools. Tell me what's going on.

Huge, sobbing, unmumsnetty hugs of thanks in advance.

Also there is a Bedales train that goes from Waterloo, a la Hogwarts.

Something you might like to assure yourself about now, at the early investigations stage, is what the boarding community is like at your candidate schools (especially if it is a day/flexi/full boarding school). They key question is: how many of the children are there all weekend? Even though your DCs might be invited to friends' or visit family some weekends, if they are in school will there be a proper community or just a handful?

For a prep school that meets your description (apart from the boarding bit), look at King Alfred School in Hamstead. You could move them to a boarding school at 13 (although the school does go up to 18 so unlikely to prepare them)

Yes, King Alfred is highly regarded - know people that used it and were pleasantly surprised.

I know Bedales all too well and it's healthy drug culture!

Up there with all the other indi schools for drugs

OP, don't want to panic you. Just because drugs are out there does not mean your children will end up dope heads, honest.

Any school full of well heeled inquisitive kids that does NOT have a drug culture would worry me more

Yes but Bedales is full of the worst type of media parents and their offspring. Schools that attract "one kind" are not balanced!

I think it's a sign of confidence - the school knows what it offers and has a distinct ethos. Parents either like it or they don't. It's true of every school.

Don't worry about putting me off at this early stage! It's great to hear all sorts of suggestions that we'd then go off to investigate. I really appreciate all the viewpoints, and as EdithWarton says, all schools will have different cultures that you really only understand after visiting and talking to some parents.

Kings, which was the only indi school I really knew of as I'm from Kent, seemed a bit, um... traditional. Not that that's a bad thing, and maybe once there it's quite different than my impression from afar.

Off to look up Cottesmore and King Alfreds (though fear without a boarding option the company will not pay).

We have lots of relatives all around London who would have the DC on the weekends if/when they board at a later date. They'll always have homes to go to, even if it's not mine for a bit! And aunties and uncles and cousins to check up on them.

And I should mention that my children are not well-heeled, in case that influences your suggestions. If someone else wasn't picking up the bill, they'd be at the comp down the street. Which under more normal circumstances I'd be fine with.

Hi again. If you are looking at boarding schools near Gatwick have you looked at Windlesham House school www.windlesham.com/. It is a rival of Cottesmore. We looked at both. We were put off Cottesmore as although they used to market themselves as the only full boarding prep (now they have day too) yet they had exeats every 2/3 weeks when the school shuts. That was not what we wanted for full boarding as we didn't want to have to rely on other people to look after our children at weekends.
Windlesham now has day children and goes up to 13. It doesn't have a uniform but does have a dress code - dark chinos/cords and checked shirt sort of thing. Lots of music and drama and sport but not at the expense of academics. They win a number of scholarships each year to a variety of schools. They have a number of FCO, expat and military families there so there is an emphasis on boarding. There is also a London bus for exeats.
Schools have a certain feel to them you will only know whether it is the school for your DC by visiting. So good luck.

That was not our experience, Colleger. DD's best friends were children of civil servants, a vet and a local architect. Like any other indi, probably.

We moved DD from Woldingham as that was seriously snooty and we all hated what it had become, even though the family had a long connection with the school.

If your DCs would be at the comp up the road in RL, I would consider a state boarding school in that case - they tend to be very good and more mixed. Christs Hospital is another contender - independent, long foundation, but very inclusive due to its massive amounts of funded places.