Boys-only schools? Good or bad idea?

[Esta3GG]

I am so disappointed with the school experiences my son has had so far that I am beginning to wonder if he might be more comfortable in a more obviously male environment - particularly having access to male teachers.

I am sick to death of him being in totally female-dominated environments where any typical boyish behaviour is criticised and repressed.

Has anyone experienced something similar and found that single sex education was a good way to go?

What do you mean by 'typical boyish behaviour' ? Is that a euphemism for 'my son is naughty and disruptive, it must be the teachers' fault' ?

Nope.
He is not naughty or disruptive. He likes to be outside and likes to be physical. He likes to learn by building and creating. He likes to work in teams. He likes physical sports like rugby instead of bleeding rounders. He has the social skills of a boy - they do interact and play totally differently to girls.

I am not keen on the idea of single sex education - but then I also think it is just bloody odd that education has become so feminised. When I was at primary school we had more male teachers than female. But in all of the schools my son has attended he has never ever had a male teacher.
That can't be right for all sorts of reasons.

He currently attends a mixed prep - 70% boys 30% girls - and yet the teaching staff is (predicatably) all female. The boys are all treated like wild animals that need to be contained and bollocked all the time. Drives me mad -I would just like him to be in an environment where boys are allowed to be boys and where their needs are properly catered for.

The all-male school I worked in had an exclusively female staff.

(I mean boys' school, obviously, not 'all-male')

I don't think an all boys school is the way to go.

In my DS's primary, there are at least 2 male teachers and the difference between boys and girls is acknowledged and boys and girls have fun. (I have a DD there as well so I am sure of this).

It may be that your school's attitude is the problem (or not a good fit for your DS). I know of some schools which have rules for everything and if you like rules and rigidity for everything then it is suitable and indeed children thrive there. Perhaps that's the thing with the school your DS is at.

There are some 'paired' single sex schools round here (one private, one pair of GS) - AFAIK most of the kids thrive. My DD chose the latter because in yr6 she was sick to the back teeth of 'boys being boys' when they were meant to be knuckling down to work!

They get together for discos, orchestra, drama type things esp further up the school. Seems reasonable - with the proviso that your DC do some out of school activities with mix as well.

I have had the same thoughts about my ds. I think that boys learn in a different way and would like his education to be tailored to boys

My DS recently started at an all boys school, Best decision ever. Much happier. Proper sports not just the PC pass the ball gently to each other that it was before. Lots of male teachers that he really likes.

I don't quite know where I read this ((or if it is just my prejudice)) but boys tend to do better in a co-ed situation, girls do better in a single-sex environment.

I think it depends on the school and the environment - the men in my immediate family have all gone to 'all boy' environments and unless they were particularly sporty or bolshy, they tended to be bullied and sidelined (both in state and private schools!) - but this is just anecdotal.

I understand that in the independent sector boys do well in both. St Paul's Boys Eton Winchester send 30 - 40% of their BOYS to Oxbridge so being boys only is not doing them any harm. In my extensive experience boys particularly boyish boys are not popular in prep schools. My DS has recently moved from his mixed prep to boys only male and female teachers although male teachers dominate and doesn't so far doesn't miss the girls. I think boys do learn differently from girls and behave differently and it's proably better to be I a school where this is understood.

It depend on the boys temperament and the individual school.

There are definite plus points to single sex education, but it's never a panacea. And the downside is that if boys and girls do not mix in ordinary day to day encounters, they are missing out on an important part of a normal community.

Ds1 went to a boys school. He loved it.
He had a few years at a mixed school but begged us to send him to a single sex school post 11.

Dd is now at a girls school.

It is a big factor for me.

The boys and girls not mixing thing was not an issue.
He had friends from both sexes from the moment they stop thinking the other sex is lame - about 13 I think.

Thank you everyone for your very interesting replies.

Given that my lad keeps encountering the same prejudices I think this goes beyond being merely a problem with his current school.
Although it does feel as if his teachers almost actively dislike boys. They certainly don't understand what makes them tick.

I recently accompanied my son's year on a nature trip to the woods. It was conducted like a WI outing and all the poor boys (who are in the majority) were chomping at the bit to run amok for a while and let off steam. As such they were all constantly reprimanded simply because they couldn't tootle along at a snail's pace holding hands and looking at "pretty flowers".
The relentless bombardment of negativity is just wrong for such small boys who are, after all, just doing what comes naturally to them. I asked the teacher why they couldn't spend half an hour making a camp - she looked at me as if I had lost my mind.

I think we will be pursuing the all-boys route because I expect my son will feel more comfortable in a more male environment. I went to an all-girls school so I know the pitfalls of single sex education - but as long as there are plenty of opportunities to mix with the opposite sex outside of school I don't think there is a problem.

Interestingly I am considering an all boys school for my ds because he is not a typical sporty, physical boy! Eg at the local mixed school hardly any boys do Food Tech for GCSE (maybe seen as a girls subject?) whereas loads do at the all-boys school.

Reading the story about the trip to the woods, the school sounds very dull for girls and boys both. Maybe what you need to look for is not simply a single sex school, but a school where there is more emphasis on physical activities and the outdoors?

My ex went to all-boys school and was very shy with girls until he was 20. I tend to blame that on the catholic upbringing though ;)

Agree with saralyn.
My son went to an ordinary state primary where every term each junior class went to the woods to make dens etc, and in year 6 they built bivies had a camp fire and stayed there over night.
Your son's school sounds dull.

DS1 is at an excellent mixed comp. he's non sporty and does food tech, boys are positively encouraged. I too would agree that with others Esta3GG your school sounds too boring for a boy and maybe even a girl. DS2 is at a boys only boarding school which we choose because it was exceedingly selective and academic rather than because it was only boys. It the usual thing I'm afraid; finding the right school for your child having done that I don't think it matters if its single sex or mixed.

Totally agree with the last few posters, you current school sounds unexciting and dull.
What are your options locally?
My oldest two DSs went to a primary school which looking back sounds similar to your sons'
Luckily they went to an amazing secondary which the youngest is just finishing, co ed but fantastic staff with lots of extra curricular/ sports ect.
They loved it.

I agree with saralyn too. Where I teach we learn outdoors where possible, and have weekly 'forest school' sessions. I have an outdoor area which is available to boys and girls for most of the day. I feel strongly that you need to look at the ethos and leadership of the school rather than blaming 'feminisation' which I find rather insulting on a lot of levels.

I agree with saralyn too. Where I teach we learn outdoors where possible, and have weekly 'forest school' sessions. I have an outdoor area which is available to boys and girls for most of the day. I feel strongly that you need to look at the ethos and leadership of the school rather than blaming 'feminisation' which I find rather insulting on a lot of levels.

sorry for double post I'm using a tablet and it is a bit odd.

I'd recommend this.

Exactly Trills. I try to treat children as individuals rather than thinking 'oh boys will like this' or 'girls will like that', but there is an awful lot of this neurosexism bollocks about at the mo.

I am sorry you find the term feminisation insulting HSHB - but given the facts what else would you call it?
4,500 primary schools have no male teachers at all.
That is more than 1 in 4.
Only 12% of English primary school teachers are male.
In Scotland it is only 8%.
In my son's entire pre-school and school experience he has never encountered a male member of staff - not even a janitor or a bursar.
It certainly wasn't this way when I was at school.

It isn't good for girls OR boys to learn solely from one gender's perspective.
If these statistics were reversed and only 8% of primary school staff were female there would be a massive outcry about how girls were being neglected and excluded by a male-dominated perspective.

Of course women are perfectly capable of teaching boys effectively and there are shit teachers of both genders but the balance is totally out of whack. Boys are being left behind now more than ever.

Personally I am delighted that more women than ever are in top jobs in education - but as the parent of a boy I am not impressed at all by the girl-centred learning and pastoral care from the all-female staff that he has experienced so far. It would be easy to say that it is just the experience of a shit school but given that this is his 4th school I fear that it is much more than that.

The reason I started this thread was to see if anyone else had found that single sex-education worked for their son, not to get into some bollocksy wrangle about gender politics.