over reaction to dyslexia -any advise welcome

[bejeezus]

my dd is in year 1. She is very bright and enthusiastic about school and learning new things. She has struggled with reading and 'sounds' and is not interested in practicing. Today her teacher told me they are quite sure she is dyslexic. She is already getting extra help in class and is taken out of class. They said she will get more help. They said she has problems with symbol recognition. She has apparently developed good coping skills.

Ridiculously, I cried. I feel inexplicably really upset about it. I dont know why really. I dont want her to struggle and loose interest in education but I was never determined that she would be a lawyer or a doctor or anything.

I need to read about dyslexia but wondered if any of you have any experience/ advice;

what DOES it ACTUALLY mean for her life?

are there personality traits associated with dyslexia?

is it a given that she will not do well academically?

is it stigmatised? do your kids get picked on for being dyslexic?

in some ways, I feel a bit relieved-it is explains quite a lot

I am a teacher-educator in a University. Yes, dyslexic people do become teachers. Yes, she is likely to come across a dyslexic teacher at some point in her school career. No, that teacher may not announce this. Dyslexia is one of very many specific learning difficulties as so many other posters have noted. I am surprised she has been diagnosed this early - one of the definitons of dyslexia includes a reading age of at least 18 months lower than the chronological age (again, noted by another poster). Many very successful people learn to deal with this difficulty, so be heartened: there are probably more dyslexics (both diagnosed and undiagnosed) out there than you even realise (and surely that's a good thing?)

2 of my dc are dyslexic.they are both very different.with ds1 we changed his school as he was labelled as naughty and disruptive(im sure he is but it was also because he wasnt getting the right help.the new school started by raising his confidence-he was encouraged to do the things he loves,art,science,making things,maths and was given lots of praise,from there that gave him the confidence to try the things -like reading and writting that he'd been told he couldnt do .dyslexia also effects his co ordination,concentration.he was late riding a bike,still cant tie his laces.
dd coped in her own way,she knows she has to try that much harder.both love that they were told that theyre brains are bigger and that the info just goes the long way round theyre brains!

i had to fight for the right help but its been worth it.

I am dyslexic, and a barrister!

As others have said, dyslexia is such a broad spectrum of problems and each individual is affected in a unique way.

I think that a lot of people with dyslexia find ways of coping with the problems that it causes, and as a result over-develop the things that are not affected. For example, I rely a lot on visual memory. If you told me your phone number, I would only be able to repeat about 3 numbers. But when I am reading my papers for work, I form a series of visual images of what I am reading, which turns out to be an advantage when I need to refer back to a particular paragraph, as I will have an image of how far through the document it is and whereabouts on the page.

It is not surprising that you are upset- you don't want her to struggle, especially with something you are powerless to change. It is great that the school have picked up on it and will make sure it has the least possible impact on her.

Bejeezus,
I hope this is making you feel better!
Where are you? There aren't many real behavioural optometrists but if you are in the London area, contact the Alexander Kobrin practice. A regular optometrist does not have the equipment to test how the eyes work together. My DD was given specs for long sightedness in one eye by our excellent family optometrist and wore them for a year with no improvement in her reading. Alexander Kobrin had the equipment to measure her eye movements independently and concluded that she really couldn't scan a line of text and move to the next line as one eye flickered around. The specs they gave her allowed her to actually read within days- it was that dramatic. Our ed psych is a big fan. Some dyslexic children do well with coloured lenses or gel overlays, others need prisms. The ed psych assessment is really key. Do not be fobbed off. Even if you have to pay for a private one, get it done asap.

we had to get ds1 tested privatly as the school refused.then we showed them the results and they didnt believe it!so then they tested him!.

Same here cheesesarnie. School kept saying he couldn't be dyslexic because he had a great vocabulary.

Hiya, apologies I haven't read all the posts. My ds is dyslexic. We struggled to get a diagnosis and even the 1st attempt by the school was half hearted. We paid and took him to Dyslexia Action. He was so far behind, lacking confidence and self esteem and it was nearly torture to get him to read. He went to dyslexia action for around 18 months and then decided that he had done enough and as he was changing schools etc I think he probably wanted a fresh start. He went into the new school with some excellent techniques, I followed these up with a parents course ran by DA. His reading age was around 4 years below where it was meant to be at 11. At 13 and in his transition meeting to go to high school his senco informed me his reading and comprehension age is now....15.1. I nearly fell over! It has been a hard few years but feel it has all been more than worth it as he is more confident and although he is well aware of his dyselxia he now just uses other methods to overcome this without making a fuss over it. I think if he thought there was a chance his dyslexia would get him some leaway he would try (lazy so n so he can be!). The new school he is going to are so supportive and are providing him with a tablet so he can access the lessons in a manner that suits him.

My ds also has scotopic sensitivity - the words move around on a page (black on white) we took him to an opticians that specialises in checking for this and prescribing coloured glasses etc that help.

Not sure how much helpful stuff I have added but I just wanted to offer some support. Scary as it can seem sometimes it really isn't the end of the world!

Good luck :)

I also took my DS to Dyslexia Action to be tested and was told he was Severely dyslexic, We used this report to get our son a Statement of Special Needs, which enabled us to get him into an excellent high school where he has gone from strength to strength.

I would push the school to get your DS as much help as she is entitled to.

What level of special needs is she on at the moment?

Sorry mean't DD

My DS1 is dyslexic. Two days ago he got his degree result. A First in his Masters in Civil Engineering.

I agree about the IQ test as the results gave him huge confidence (and us in him) knowing that he was bright. Primary school were rubbish with him (he is now 22 so dyslexia less understood then) and didn't seem to realise that he had other strengths. He didn't pass the 11+ so went to a local faith Comp which was fine for him and he could be top of the tree (good for confidence). He then changed to a private school for A levels where it was shock to find he was average at maths (his main strength) but it was a v academic school so he did well and went to a good redbrick Uni.

He now has a job in the field of his degree in his preferred location in the UK and turned down two other similar offers (yes, a graduate turning down jobs).

How has he achieved this? By being born into an era when computers at home and in class were just about being poplular, by working v v hard, having a lot of stress, being intelligent, having supportive parents who were clued up and were able to pay for out of school specialist tutors from age of diagnosis (7) until age 12 and getting extra time in exams at school and at Uni.

Congratulations to you both, pippop
And thanks for the encouragement to others !

And at the age of 7 (he was the oldest in his school year) he could not spell his own first name with any degree of accuracy - it does have eight letters though.

it is really reassuring to be able to read all your stories, thank you. it is bringing me back to how I thought dyslexia is, before 3 days ago! funny how your perception changes when your own children are affected.

lots of really helpful 'technical' advice too. I will be looking into getting a test on monday. Unfortunately funds dont stretch to any private tutoring. but might start squirreling in case it becomes something we want in the future. At the moment, whilst she is so confident and enthusiastic about school and I feel satisfied the teachers and school are 'on it' then i dont think its necessary. She isnt bottom of the abilities in her class- she is about middle. Teachers seemed pretty impressed that she had developed her own set of skills and techniques for dealing with it. They said also that she never is overwhelmed by a task, is a really good problem solver and will always ask for help when she needs it.

Hi,
One caveat...
I know that you say you are happy now with the way the school is handling it and how well DD is coping but...
A bright girl with a good vocabulary will only cope well while she only meets words in books and formulations of syntax that she uses or hears in speech around her. And then...
I've seen several girls who 'passed' as neuro- normal and then crashed. The pictures and logic of ORT only last 2-3 years. The ideal is to sort out the problems BEFORE she discovers that she can't read Harry Potter. It is cheaper for the school to say it is all fine. Less paper work and hassle from you. It WILL NOT be fine in 2 years time. If they won't arrange an urgent ed psych appointment, find the money for a private one, see a behavioural optometrist and find out how to help your daughter.

I could so easily have had a demotivated, demoralised little girl if we hadn't gone at this aggressively while she was in the first years of schooling.

At least these days schools are more aware than in our day.
My DD has done OK ( actually doing OK+) now in Yr 7 at secondary, with normal support from us and primary school - did have one particularly understanding teacher for two years. So extra, specialist help may not always be necessary - but partly depends on how challenging child is finding things at school I guess.

'one of the definitons of dyslexia includes a reading age of at least 18 months lower than the chronological age' - not true

Yet another one wanting to reassure you that academic avenues are not closed to your DD. I am a dyslexic vet I have two degrees, run my own business employing 17 people and am a clinical coach teaching veterinary nurses.
Has it been harder for me than my peers - Yes. My coping mechanism is repetition I have to write things out over and over and over again to be able to learn them.
I still have rubbish hand eye co-ordination can't catch a ball at all, I reverse my numbers when I am tired and regularly struggle with my spelling.
My mum cried when she found out that both myself and my DSis were dyslexic she says now she thinks it was relief that she hadn't imagined that it was more difficult for us.
Your DD is getting the help that she needs and the future is bright.

lizcat--my dd wants to be a vet. I know it is early days but shes been quite adamant for a while...i've been thinking about how to gently steer her in other directions.

That was going to be my next question...if a dyslexic child/ teenager wants to be a vet/ dr/ solicitor etc....what do you think?? Encourage and support them teaching them that you can be what ever you want with enough effort or try and help them choose an easier path (with less reading!!)

I suppose the answer depends on how much the child wants the choosen path and I suppose these kinds of questions are easier to address as the child gets older and I/you can have these discussions with them

But its really really good to hear that this is all possible and really well done for persevering-must have been really hard work

My parents always supported me and encouraged me. They always said that as long as I tried my best they were proud. Yes, it was damn hard work to pass the exams and I would hide my self away for three weeks each year before exams.
Being a vet is not nearly as hard as the exams and I am glad everyday that I put in the hard slog.
I had a discussion last night with a friend and we both agreed that the great thing about science is that hard work does get you a very long way.
My DSis - also dyslexic- is a chartered construction engineer with a masters degree, so yet another example for you. and nobody has mentioned the most famous dyslexic of all Einstein.

Dyslexia has not been replaced by SLD but it comes under the ehading, and a great many LEAs will simply not test now and so they cannot say 'dyslexia' but have to say SLD or as ds2'a IEP states 'dyspraxic traits, dyslexic traits, adhd traits' (if we want a DX qe have to go private or persuade Health to refer, private out of the question, Health saying school's issue).

DH runs his own business in stage lighting and is doing his degree in the field alongside, he got his grades last week with % marks in the 80 and 90 range. DS2 is very bright and wordy but has massive issues with organisation, short term memeor and his reding age of 14 (he is ten) does not translate to written ability at all.

I wouldnever try and dissuade him from a path but his chosen options atm (conservationist / ranger or chef) fir his personality exactly (active, energetic, loves cooking or having a rnage of sea slubs about his person- not at the same time afaik but I'd not be surprised...) so I give his opportunities to maximise those interests.

There is nothing a dyslexic can't do! I have dyslexic friends who are doctors, solicitors, writers, actors, architects, engineers, bankers.....Do not discourage your DD- she can be anything!
CQ... is right about reading age. If DD had been in a state school, no one would have raised the alarm because she was at a 'normal' level. The first inkling came at entry assessment for selective private at 4+ because she had a very uneven development profile. Her pre-prep got very concerned in yr1 as she wasn't a fluent reader yet and her verbal ability was so much higher. Dyslexia (umbrella term) is just a mismatch between intelligence and reading level.

Can I ask how you get a test before the usual age 7? Do you get an independent ed. psych to do it?

Lion- mosta reas will have dyslexia centres that can run them (independent ed psychs cost loads!). Try here

Hi,
The tests are calibrated from age 6. My DD was 6yrs and 3 weeks and we used an independent one. £400 well spent. It is 3-4 hours of testing plus a very long report and a second session to discuss the results. We got a recommendation from her school but the DA website has them by area. My DD felt so positive after she was told that she was between the 97-99.9th % for just about everything but the common traits of visual perceptual dyslexia- meaning, she cannot form pictures in her head and lacked the visual memory to recognise whole words, do puzzles etc.DD had to sound out every word each time she saw it, didn't leave spaces, spelled phonetically, reversed numbers-exhausting and frustrating for her. We also saw the behavioural optometrist a week later and his assessment was the same(all this is chicken and egg- do dyslexic children have visual problems because of different wiring or do they wire differently in response to the faulty visual input?). Patching and glasses followed but every child is different.This all required organisation and pestering. The ed psych put us onto a dyslexia tutor who took DD back to pattern recognition. She still sees the SENCO every week and uses lots of techniques to block visual noise. Far from being singled out at school, her classmates are a bit jealous that DD gets pulled out and almost all of them now use sheets to cover their work and rulers to focus on one line of text at a time. DD still has any colourful books copied in black and white and we choose books based on print style and whiteness of the paper.

peachy and hmm thank you so much (and apologies OP for slight hijack). I think I will look into this for DS, who has just turned six, has worked with a SALT for speech (something unclassifiable to do with how he processes language) and is now struggling with the basics of literacy.

Do you think this seems like a good idea? I don't know if I'm being OTT or not but to wait until he's 7 seems a bit passive if there is something that can be done before.

Thanks again.

p.s. I know an English literature professor with dyslexia.