Guess the age of the child that wrote this

[Cortina]

My niece wrote this at school. What would you gauge her 'writing age' to be from this ( admittedly isolated) example?:

With a good ten minutes to spare I settled myself down in a corner seat on a train to London, and for a time it looked as if my only companion was to be an old lady. Then, almost at the last moment, a man and a girl hurried up the platform. The man pushed the girl into the carriage and threw her case in just after her. "Only just in time!" He said angrily. "And now, don't lose this one!" Besides a flush and tightly pressed lips the girl took no notice, leaving the ticket where he flung it in her lap. The man said a cold goodbye and walked off. The girl didn't look at him as the train drew off from the station.

It was composition, or whatever they call it these days, in class LaWeasel.
The comments underneath were 'good beginning but I thought the explanation was rather unlikely'. The story goes on to centre around the girls suitcase which looks suspicious and threatening but turns out to be innocuous and be filled with sheet music as the girl is a musician. There's quite a lot of build up and I think it's quite good and original although it probably is 'unlikely'. The grammar is pretty good, a missed question mark and comma in the main body of the essay, there are no spelling mistakes I think.

I'm a bit surprised that people are quibbling about paragraphs in such a short extract! That is a paragraph of writing, more or less, surely? Where would one put paragraph breaks?

I was going to say 11, was thinking year 6.

I'm a KS2 English SATs marker and this reminded me of some of the better writing respones I've seen - surprised she's in bottom set, although I suppose she's a year further on than the papers I mark. Is her birthday in the summer making her one of the youngest in her year?

Ha! to teacher criticising it as unlikely. That's most (all) of great Western fiction dismissed then.

If it's your niece's own work (and not copied from a book) then it looks very good to me. Doesn't matter too much how original it is, it's normal to rewrite plots you've come across before when you're young, and it's how many writers begin.

If I were you, I'd definitely encourage her writing, maybe just by reading things she's written and telling her what you enjoy about them. Writers need readers! it will be great for her confidence to feel someone enjoys what she writes. She could write you a serial, with a chapter a week or month.

What was her writing like last year Cortina?

If the DC was older Halogen they would know where to put the paragraph breaks.

Whatever age she is, she is doing well and should be encouraged.

My point was, why would you need a paragraph break in that extract at all? It reads like a paragraph on its own.

I think it's really good for an 11 year old and either everyone else in her school is a genius or she struggles with other aspects of English and that's why she is in the bottom set. I think the teachers comments could be a bit more encouraging however.

I think it is really good for age 11, but only if it hasn't been very heavily influenced by some jolly old book she has read. It doesn't really have the feeling of being original.

As others have said, even if it is heavily borrowed from her readnig, it shows good competance with punctuation, etc, so bottom set sounds surprising.

I would expect speech to start on a new line,Halogen. Has someone said she is in the bottom set? I would be surprised if she was.

Speech doesn't necessarily start on a new line, though; just look at almost any modern novel. Yes, she is in the bottom set. I agree that she probably shouldn't be (unless there are other issues that don't show from this piece of work).

New speaker new line but this is the same speaker. However I would then start a new paragraph.

but it is still a good piece of writing

Ah, I see. I hadn't thought of a new speaker on a new line - that makes sense. Still, it seems quite a small mistake for a bottom set 11 year old, and the sort of thing that almost any 11 year old might forget from time to time even if quite good at writing.

You lot make me laugh, it's a good piece of writing for her age. Considerably better than some of the people on here!

'Considerably better than some of the people on here'...meaning the whole of MN, not this thread

has anyone said it isn't?

I don't think that anyone has said that it isn't good-we were asked to give an age.

There are quite a lot of people suggesting it's the standard of a 9yo! I think it's quite good for 11, certainly better than bottom set.

Asking her to write you a book is a lovely idea. I loved to write stories at that age, I had a group of friends who all liked to write and we would swap them over and read each others, or put together comics and eventually films. (Not that we took things really far or anything... ) It was really fun.

Well, the 9, 10 or less comments are a bit . I think the writing is very good for an 11 year old. People are taking the mick a little bit.

I wish I had samples of our KS2 (Y5/6) children's writing MrBloomEatsVeggies

I appreciate that's it's my own opinion. I haven't actually seen an average 9, 10 or 11 year old's writing (aside from my own and my peers, and that was a while ago). It just seemed pretty good to me, and people were being a little bit mean and facetious (not you personally mrz). Plus the writing standards can be pretty bad on here sometimes (including mine!).

Are you a teacher mrz?

Personally I think it is a great piece of writing at whatever age

Yes I'm a primary teacher and literacy coordinator

exoticfruits - to make your life easier, highlight the OP's posts in Customise. Then you can pick up where she has answered the age question, and where she has said the child is in the bottom set for English quite easily.