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Education

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Original poster

Do you sometimes feel you're 'home edding' your school-going DCs?

19 replies

erebus · 29/03/2011 17:19

sigh.

I've just spent a good hour trawling the web to find out how DCs are taught 'persuasive writing', so I can help DS2 who has evidently failed to grasp the concept at school. I now know the 'keywords' that will gain points in class.

I have bought 'modern maths for mums and dads' so I can find out what chunking is, amongst many other new maths methodologies!

Sometimes I smile as I realise my parents needed to have nothing whatsoever to do with my actual schooling beyond helping with table chanting.

Now I sometimes feel there's too much at stake to 'allow' a borderline DC to get a D not a C, these days. There IS no Plan B.!

OP posts:

Hullygully · 29/03/2011 17:20

god yes. I thought it was compulsory.

MumInBeds · 29/03/2011 17:22

Absolutely and I love being involved. Obviously it would be better if the school could offer all that a supportive parent could but as they can't I relsih the chance to be involved.

Original poster

erebus · 29/03/2011 17:34

No, tbh, I resent the hours I have to spend on it. I have no problem at all with assisting or 'extending' what they're doing in school but oh so often it's a question of having to reteach what they failed to grasp in class, esp DS2- but without the benefit of knowing what method the teacher used (that obviously didn't work!) and having knowledge of few alternative methods to try without further muddying the waters!

It's not 'the time' in itself I 'resent', it's the trawling over the same ground, which uses up precious time I could use to 'extend' the DCs, expand upon, provide concrete examples relating something they're learning to 'real life', for example. Not reteaching the basic lesson from scratch!

OP posts:

squidgy12 · 29/03/2011 19:11

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Tabliope · 29/03/2011 19:52

you've summed it up to a T squidgy12. That's exactly how I feel about it all despite trying not too - you get swept along with everyone else. When I was at school my parents turned up for parents evening and that was it. There just wasn't the competitiveness of now.

FreudianSlippery · 29/03/2011 20:00

It's very depressing and I really hope it doesn't happen with our DCs. The local schools are fab here, but we will see...

Unfortunately my DSCs - who live in another part of town - have not been so lucky. And we get the fun of cramming a week's worth of non-learning catch-up into a weekend or overnight stay!

I actually logged on to post about this very topic.

emy72 · 29/03/2011 20:03

Yep I feel the same way. I never thought I had to shoulder so much responsibility for their education. I wonder whether this is why a lot of people pay for private, because some of that responsibility is taken away? Or am I just fooled to think that and actually it's the same for everyone?

squidgy12 · 29/03/2011 20:29

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squidgy12 · 29/03/2011 22:30

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RoadArt · 29/03/2011 23:35

My teachers expect me to carry on doing the work I do with my DCs at home - they both admit they dont have the time to dedicate to their specific needs and seem glad that I am actively involved.
Their focus is on the kids who are struggling.

It has also been a great learning curve for me and I enjoy it

cory · 30/03/2011 00:21

Dd is off sick between 1/3 and 2/3 of the time and has been for years, so yes I do, though less than I used to; she is now in Yr 9 and mostly takes responsibility herself. And the secondary school are more organised about web sites and emailing work; the junior school never did much for her, so either I did it or it didn't get done.

My parents spent at least as much time home edding me, not at all because they were worried about the future but just because they loved teaching. Can't remember them ever paying much attention to my school reports or anything mundane like that, but do remember being made to recite Heine in German and getting long lectures on Indo-European sound laws at the breakfast table (I suppose I would have been about 10). I wish I could afford their unworldly attitude towards these things- but they had healthy children

cory · 30/03/2011 00:23

And though I do resent the time I have to spend at home with dcs (ds also has chronic health problems) when we should all be enjoying ourselves elsewhere, I can't imagine a situation where the school covered all my dcs' education; there are so many things I do want to share with them and areas which I do know better than your average school teacher.

colditz · 30/03/2011 00:24

yes and I bloody hate it. I'm not very well educated myself and I am dreading the day when they come home with sopmething I cannot help them with

wordfactory · 30/03/2011 07:41

To be honest I love being involved in my children's education.
I see myself as a home edder who uses school as one of our resources.
Like Cory, I just assumed that there would be certain areas that I could cover with more knowledge and enthusiasm.

That said, my DC do go to a fab school where much is covered and well. I might feel resentful if I were haing to teach the basics.

IndigoBell · 30/03/2011 11:51

I don't have to HE my DS2 who is doing well at school.

But I def do have to HE DS1 and DD who are both on the SEN register.

I work full time, are away from the house from 7:30am - 7:30pm. It is causing me (and them) enormous stress.

Unfortunately I trusted school to Educate DS1 and DD and they failed to. So now I am doing an enormous amount of catch up work.

My expectations aren't high - just that they leave primary school able to read, write and add up. But unfortunately it became clear that school were not able to do this.

OliPolly · 30/03/2011 13:07

I am way more literate than my parents where when I went to school. They gave me so much encouragement in other ways though.

I love working with my DCs at home but I tend to concetrate on stuff they have already done just to ensure thats its all going smoothly. If its a nightmare, I let go and tell the teacher! I get so I don't want to go overboard

walsingham · 30/03/2011 22:43

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

IntotheNittyGritty · 30/03/2011 23:00

I enjoy helping my children at home and I dont see it as a chore. They do a lot of maths study on computer games but they enjoy it, they do not feel under pressure and they are happy to do it. By using a computer programme it also means they are learning the correct methods of calculation which is the same as the school is teaching them so they are not getting conflicting advice from me.

I never test tables or spellings. These are topics they need to know and learning a few words to pass a test and immediately forget is pointless. I used to, but dont think there is long term benefit in doing so.

TheFallenMadonna · 30/03/2011 23:08

But I think that is what you are buying with your DC's education though surely walsingham? A culture of perfection? And maybe a need for early perfection with entrance exams etc?

My DC go to a fab school, and we do very little to supplement their work there. We read to them a lot, supervise music practice and answer their questions. And I am a teacher myself and didactic by nature...

I am pretty confident that they will indeed work hard for their exams and do very well. Both are able and have good memories. A few missed spellings in years 2 and 5 are really neither her nor there IMO.

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