I like the taxi/ bus driver analogy as well! But what perplexes me, is that even though those parents who don?t discipline their kids effectively and don?t care, are in the minority, their children appear to set the agenda for what happens in the classroom. It's like this tiny very vocal minority are the ones whose values and priorities have taken over schools, against the wishes of the majority who are then dominated by them. (I remember once having an absolutely ineffective maths teacher for a year, and the whole class was out of control - I was as much out of control as everyone else, and was scared and unhappy about it - it was such a relief for all of us, including the ringleaders, when our old, stern maths teacher came back and imposed order).
As far as unruly behaviour in the classroom is concerned, practically no-one is in favour of it - even the parents who are unable to discipline their kids at home, don?t want school to allow them to behave like that at school (I was having a chat with one of those the other day - she was complaining that her out of control child hadn't been punished properly for his behaviour at school and "they let him get away with anything". I nearly fell over! ). And yes I know that?s unfair and I know that parents should not abdicate their responsibility to parent effectively and expect the school to do it for them, but otoh if schools don?t set a high benchmark of behaviour, they are damaging all the children who come from homes where parents do care about behaviour standards and are trying to impose proper boundaries (not to mention the kids who don't).
I suppose what I?m saying, is that parents who don?t back schools up are obviously a menace, but schools who don?t back parents up, and allow children to get away with bad behaviour, are also a menace ? I really don?t want any school to teach my child that it?s OK to swear at an adult, to throw chairs around, to attack other kids etc. It?s not in my interest or in their's. And I don?t know what the answer is, but there are examples of schools where the kids have been semi-feral within the school, but a new regime has turned the school around ? there was an article recently about a terrible failing school in the East End of London where the headmaster came in and simply imposed a new regime to turn the school into one of the most oversubscribed in the area with great results. He was working with the same kids and the same parents as the regime before, but he managed to get them to behave differently. I guess he must have had the support of the LEA, the governors, his teachers, the parents, the pupils etc, plus the vision and faith to push his changes through and who knows what else. Waffle waffle waffle, but I agree with Berries, the knee-jerk parent-bashing which seems to be the response to bad behaviour, is not a positive development. It just sets up a "them and us" scenario which no one reasonable, parent or teacher, can possibly think is a healthy relationship. And I'm also a bit puzzled by it tbh, because while most parents aren't teachers and know absolutely sweet FA about what goes on in classrooms, most teachers actually are parents, (aren't they?) and do know an awful lot about parenting and its complexitites. But I guess after a few years of experiencing loony parents every day, they could well perceive other parents with a pretty jaded eye, if a survey is put in front of them, those parents are going to be uppermost in their minds when they answer the questions - especially if it's the day after some loon has just demanded that their son be let off detention for the tenth time, because pulling a knife on another pupil is just natural high spirits!