London prep school 8+ exams are upon us - anyone else?

[Michaelah]

Is anyone else going through the joyous process of sitting 8+ exams for London boys' prep school entrance. DS has his first in a exactly a week, and I am torn between dread, and a lust to get it all over with. We are doing Westminster, Sussex House, Wetherby and Thomas's Battersea.

Is all so hideous. Such an old fashioned curriculum, and so shrouded in secrecy if one is approaching it other than from a pre-prep which is set up for it (eg Eaton House, Wetherby pre-prep etc) - DS's school runs to 11, so is always pushing to keep the boys for the duration.

Would love to hear any past or current experiences (or moans!)

Sympathies here. Ds also has his first exam next week, and will be finished in 2 weeks (only sitting for 2 schools).

How is your son holding up? My ds seems so relaxed- more so than his parents! Probably because he just accepts that this is something he has to do if he wants to go to a particular school. I'm relatively calm, but I'll be less so on decision mornings. I'm not overly optimistic despite ds doing v well on mocks because numbers applying this year are reported to be staggering. Ugh - don't want to go through, or put ds through this again.

DS was at a local primary. We applied to the two best London "preps" near us and told him to do his best because the outcome didn't matter because he had a school regardless. We also didn't tutor because we felt the right school would take him on his own merits.

He got into both and we chose the closest for an easy life. He is very very happy and always has been.

DD did 11+ last year, not as academic as her brother and again no tutoring. Did five tests, two state and three independent (not highflyers, ie, we knew St Pauls, LEH were out of the question).

I know many won't agree but I think you have to be realistic and have to send them where they will be their happiest and not hothouse them for an environment they will struggle to keep up in and which may be miles away so on top of constantly having to "keep up" they have two hours of travelling as well.

I agree about not cramming for the exams and choosing schools where the child will be happiest. We didn't cram, just went along with his pre-prep and reinforced any weaknesses at home - no tutoring/kumon/drilling.

We chose the 2 schools because they just suited him. DS is a quirky character who prefers reading about engineering feats of ancient civilizations over playing/discussing football. SInce reception, his teachers have given him extra projects to do because he gets into mischief if he gets "bored" intellectually. He is a friendly character, but has not made close friends at school simply due to a complete lack of interest in most sports and slightly unusual interests. Unfortunately, the two school which suited his personality and where he would thrive are so heavily oversubscribed, hence the doubt about him getting in.

I think if you follow the advice of the pre-prep you'll be fine then. We know lots of quirky children btw who have been very very happy at Felton Fleet if that's within spit of you.

Unfortunately, I'm in West London so it was a choice of the very big name preps only (i.e., only 3-4 schools). DS is taking 7+, so there is always 8+ should he not get in this time.

Been thru this last year. Stressful few weeks. With hindsight, I was more nervous/worried than DS. DS only got nervous towards the interview stage but that was because he really wanted one particular school. Try not to be too stressed as children can sense it. DS really enjoyed and had fun at 3 out of the 4 assessments he took. The one he didn't enjoy is not on your list so don't worry. Good luck!

MrsBadger2 (are you the same Mrs Badger who gives fabulous shopping advice??) sorry can't give good advice as not going through this myself mercifully, but have two very good friends in the thick of it, and can assure you they are also a twitching, rune-reading bundle of nerves in private with me & other not involved, but they look breezy & carefree to the other mothers their pre-prep! So I expect everyone is the same unde the surface - very nerve-wracking. Best of luck!!!!!

Hello mrsbadger2. DS is sitting the King's 7+ too. I'm fairly relaxed...but that is because it hasn't happened yet. I know that I'll be anxious AFTER he has taken the exam. I have heard that there are about 500 boys applying this year (from another mum of an applicant so I can't vouch for veracity), so an insane number.

I have prepped DS from the beginning that he may not get in but that does not mean that he has failed - just that he was not ready at this stage. I told him that I would be proud of him for just having the guts to go through the process and finish the exam on time. However, I know that he would be crushed if he didn't get in because he absolutely loved the school and he has been working extra hard since visiting the school because he really wants to go there.

I think that, at this stage, the best thing is to stay cool, particularly in front of your son. I'm being blase because I don't want him to get anxious because of me. I have forbid DH to discuss the exam with DS, except in a supportive way, and to definitely not discuss it with me except if DS is not around. No cramming going on here, and I have planned a play date for Friday so he relaxes before the exam.

Good luck to your DS for Saturday (and my sympathies for yourself until then!)

Having been through the KCS 7+ (well DS did) you have my sympathies. I'm not sure I can offer many particularly helpful coping strategies beyond what has already been suggested.

If it helps I think you should not focus solely on Saturday. Of course the exam is important but my understanding is that it is there to ensure that boys have reached a level at which they will be able to cope with the academic pace at the school. The decision on whether to admit a boy places a lot of emphasis on the activity morning and the interview so you should take some comfort that these are already under your belt (or it will be by Thursday lunchtime).

I also found it helped to suggest to DS that the selection process works both ways - the school works out if they think your son is right for it but your son and you are making an assessment whether you think the school is right for you.

Can't help on what to do while you're waiting for the result though. Chocolate and rioja would be my suggestion...

Good luck to all.

Please see my post above. Please don't let your boys think it's really that important. The most important thing is that they are happy and happy boys make confident, successful boys. KCJS is not for all and it's tough if there's any doubt about whether they should be there. And if you get in, in the first week please DO NOT turn into Clifton Road from Southside - you will cause CHAOS - it's an unwritten rule and Merton won't make it one way.

Just thought I'd add that there are 380 boys coming for the KCJS exams on Sat but that is 7+, 8+, 9+ and 10+ so not 500!

Good luck to all.

Hope everyone's sons are relaxing after the KCJS exam yesterday. DS is pleased it is over, and after a celebratory feast of burgers, milkshake and chips (his choice!) and an evening relaxing with countless hours of tele, he seems to have put the whole experience out of his mind.

Actually, he thought it wasn't too bad, and that it was quite fun . Good thing as he has one more next week!

Hmm - can blame you lot then for traffic on the Ridgeway on Saturday morning. Made us late for football it did. Good luck!

Thanks for the advice SofaQueen - spot on I suspect. We are now at the waiting for results phase, which he doesn't seem to find at all stressful (wish I could say the same!)

If it's any consolation, my DS got into a fight at the KCS activity day so I don't suppose he'll get an offer - one more place available for someone else! (Not hugely disappointed - he's an August birthday and not as mature as some!)

Good luck everyone.

TRoSA I like your Ds already!!! Good luck!!!

He's certainly a lively little chap. Keeps us on our toes ... Not sure how he'd cope at KCS, though - I think they might like their pupils to be a little more disciplined and restrained than he is [useless mother emoticon]