Are you or your preschool child allowed to use the toilets at school?

[fqueenzebra]

I keep getting told off for this.
I pick almost 4yo DD up from preschool at 2:55pm (really more like 2:58pm), school-age DS gets let out at about 3:02 pm. We are almost always late to pick him up; I just can't get over any faster. I try to remember to take DD to the toilet before leaving preschool, but means I'll be even later to pick up DS1, and she often refuses to go or needs only a wee just then.

2 minutes after DS1 gets released, DD almost invariably needs a "big job", which she can't really clean up by herself; I need to go in with her.

We can't use Staff Toilets (Staf only, even out of hours not be used by others)

I can't go into little ones toilets (KS1) area -- they have decided it's a health & safety issue (we adults might be pervies). School would be ok if I sent her in on her own, mind.

They have begrudgingly said that rather than DD sh*ing in the schoolyard I might be able to take her to the toilets at the far end of the building (Year 6 area). That's next to the preschool, so I may as well just go back there, except that DD will scream the whole way about how desperately she needs the toilet and DS will protest loudly & drag his heels getting there, too.

Are adults allowed, after or nearly after school hours, in your school toilets?

There are also many heavily pregnant mums picking up children at our school, including one who is 37 weeks pregnant & walks 1.2 miles each way to the school. Presumably they aren't allowed to use the toilets either!

I never asked..just used it!!! Adults can use our staff loo, well so can siblings

Yes. It's not an issue. The "adult" toilets do say no children but I take that to mean no unaccompanied children.

How very strange.

I have taken dd4 in to the toilets, she is potty taining so when she needs to go she NEEDS to go

I wouldn't use them coz the staff toilets are not accesible and I don't fancy using the kiddies ones, they are a bit low

seems VERY odd to me... why on earth cant you take her into the toilet of your choice?

Is it really that adults mustne be in there is schol hours? that is mad if it applies to your circumstances...

My dad has a phrase "Rules are there for the GUIDANCE of a wise man, and ABSOLUTE OBEDIANCE of a fool!" given that its last couple of mins into school time and the child is 4, IMO there is no need to be that srict then!

My younger kids have used the school loos many a time. The staff don't always look too keen though.

im suprised to hear that we use the childrens toilets quite often (me included sometimes) before & after school & nobody bats an eyelid.

Message withdrawn

At our school they don't mind, but you do have to go in by the main entrance and sign in.

Maybe I could suggest the signing in thing... although that will take as long as just trekking over to the preschool toilets, I reckon.

At dd's school the reception children were not allowed to go from the before and after school care to toilet on their own - in case they started wandering - therefore if you wanted them to go before going home you took them yourself. Admittedly I only went into the actual toilet area if there were no other girls in there and dd needed hurrying up. I have also seen other parents take children not at school along to the toilet.

When dd was at nursery if I needed to go I would ask the staff and then use the staff toilet, was always told just use it but I felt it was only right to ask.

Maybe you should suggest to the school that you stand outside the girl's toilet and if dd requires your assistance that she will call you (but you will only go in if no other girls are in there and ds will stand guard) or dd could waddle to the toilet door if she needs assistance (I wonder what health and safety would say about that!!) or would ds be able to assist her and go in the girls toilet.

God, this just sounds mad. I hope you find a solution zebra.

Not a problem in my DS school. All sounds very odd to me. Worth raising with the school governors.

as www says, what a mad situation. I took my pre school son to the after school toilets, if needed. Didn't think twice about it. Mind you, the school is a small one and everyone knows each other - and they were not keen on parents wandering around the school uninvited. I got told off for that once.

I think you should be able to use the staff toilets, at least.

Why not ask them what happens when parents volunteer to go into the school during school hours, to man a break time cake stall, for instance? what loo are they expeced to use? I am sure the school wouldn't ban them from using all the loos. So whatever the loo arrangements for visiting parents should extend to you and your dd IMO.

i have always done it with dd2 - no one has ever mentioned it, but its a tiny school

We always end up using the staff toilets, as they're by the front door. This is for DS1 who's a student at the school, but only 3, so needs help.

I've never asked, and I've never signed in. It's a pretty relaxed school, though, lots of kids stay and play for ages in the playground after school, with their parents, and that's when we always end up needing the loo.

At the last school I worked at there was one female adult loo between about 14 female members of staff (illegal I think, but anyway). This meant that there was always a queue at morning break and lunchtimes, and often you simply didn't get the chance/time to use it, so come 3.10pm, the staff (who can't go to the toilet and leave their classes during the afternoon) would again be rushing, knees crossed, to that one precious loo, and woe betide any mother and toddler blocking up the ameneties....... silly, I know, but it was a real problem.

Mind you, nobody minded preschoolers using the children's toilets, so that was ok.

Oh, there are three loos all in a row at DS1's school, and no queue for them, ever. I'd feed guilty if we were taking up a loo that was desperately needed for teachers, not least as DS1 went through a phase of having a poo after school there.

at our old primary school the staff loo was always available but obviously one had to check in with the secretaries first. IIRC there is some wierd old law which states that if a toilet is requested, you cannot refuse the use of one. Will try and find it

Doesn't seem to be an issue at ours - I've seen Mums and toddler popping in as school finishes.

I'm going to potty train ds2 very soon so I could well be needing to use it too!

Thanks for the feedback everyone.
I don't think I will try to change anything, but at least now I can have a right moan about the situation (around the other moms) and feel totally in the right.