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Confusion about schools.

17 replies

GollyMissMolly · 17/10/2010 22:43

DC is in the very fortunate position of having places at two very good independent schools but we are finding it difficult to choose.

One school is very, very academic but less rounded.

The other school is more rounded and DC wants to go there and doesn't want to go to the other one even though the other school is 60% cheaper.

I like both equally and think they will both suit DC.

What would you do - value for money or what will make DC happy?

OP posts:
PoorlyConstructed · 17/10/2010 22:47

If you can afford it, and you like them both, go with where your DS would rather go. Well-roundedness is actually very important for when the time comes to apply to uni / for jobs.

DancingHippoOnAcid · 17/10/2010 22:48

There may well be a reason other school is 60% cheaper - or not, doesn't always follow.

If the cost is really going to be that crucial to you, you may be better off with the state system.

I would always say a more rounded school is better. Even the most academic DCs need some balance.

GollyMissMolly · 17/10/2010 22:58

The cost for the more expensive one is doable but it would be nice for bank of mum and dad to be a bit healthier and for mum and dad to eventually spend some money on themselves! Wink

The academic school is still rounded but just less so and the reason it's 60% cheaper is because of a scholarship so I am not worried about it being a lesser school.

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DancingHippoOnAcid · 17/10/2010 23:18

Oh I see, so the actual fees are not 60% cheaper.

How old is your DC? If secondary school age would be inclined to listen carefully to their views, just make sure they have sensible reasons for their preference?

Which school caters best for your DCs particular interests?

What is your gut feeling? Try imagining your DC attending each of the schools. Which feels more right?

Really, if you are going to pay there is no point trying to make your DC fit an unsuitable school becuase of price. I know it would be nice to save all that cash, but if price is crucial to you, you may all be happier with a state school.

ForMashGetSmash · 17/10/2010 23:30

Gosh I think you need to ake the scolarship...of course DC is important in the inal choice...but that cash will pay for any trips or school activities wont it? I would try to excite DC about the cheaper option!

GollyMissMolly · 17/10/2010 23:31

My gut is the academic school because I think it suits DC's personality and it was my suggestion for him to sit the test. It's not because it's academic because I know it wouldn't suit other DC's.

OH and DC have assummed that DC was always going to the second school and they can't get their heads round that another school may be more suitable. DC can't give any reasons for not liking the first school just that he's always wanted to go to second. I'm confused! Confused

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senua · 17/10/2010 23:39

Have you told school No2 that you have a scholarship at school No1? How do you think that they would react to the information. Wink

GollyMissMolly · 17/10/2010 23:53

They know but they have a policy of not trying to out do another school by offering larger scholarship.

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senua · 18/10/2010 08:24

What! They are not even saying "we can't match their scholarship but we can offer something". They are not even trying!? What does that tell you about the school?

What is the scholarship for: academic, sporting, musical?

What do you mean when you say school No2 is more rounded? What roundedness do they provide that you can't provide at home?

GollyMissMolly · 18/10/2010 09:29

The second school have the policy mentioned above but all there awards are honorary as they save their fee discounts for bursaries which is understandable.

The other school is more rounded due to it's location and intake, which is still selective but not as selective and look for other qualities such as sportiness, musicality etc. It's difficult to explain but it is more rounded! Lol!

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DancingHippoOnAcid · 18/10/2010 09:58

GollyMissMolly - if your gut feeling is that the first school would suit your DC then I would go with that and persuade Dc and DH round to your point of view. Sounds like they don't have a good reason to be against 1st school, have just got used to assuming DC will go to the second school. We mums always know best! Smile

A more academic intake does not necesarily make the school less rounded, my DDs school has the reputation as being one of the most academic in the area but they are still really strong in the arts (which surprises a lot of people who do not have DDs at the school) and her classmates have lots of diverse talents. Have a talk with 1st school about their non academic activities, you may be pleasantly surprised.

senua · 18/10/2010 09:58

Are you saying it is a school for Tim-nice-but-dim?

Academic kids are frequently also musical, sporrty etc (in fact, the sort of kids that make you want to spit - they excel at everything Grin)

GollyMissMolly · 18/10/2010 10:09

Thanks Acid Hippo!

Senua, NO, 2nd choice is very oversubscribed and difficult to get into but not as hard as 1st. Half the kids are probably as bright as my 1st choice but the other half are still able but not as geeky! Grin

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snorkie · 18/10/2010 15:35

Golly, we had pretty much exactly the same situation with ds 6 years ago. After much heart searching we chose the more expensive, more rounded option with aa bigger academic ability spread in spite of being far more sure of his academic leanings than anything else. With hindsight it was the right decision for him - he has been extremely happy at school; has achieved musically far in excess of our wildest imaginations; has succeeded in various sporting pursuits that he wouldn't have had the opportunity to try elsewhere (eg sailing); and actually couldn't have achieved better academic results (or even as good as it happens) to date at the other school either.

Of course, just because it was right for our ds doesn't mean it will be for yours - we left the choice to him in the end and luckily he made the right one.

Acanthus · 18/10/2010 15:37

We had exactly this choice (are you in the north?) We have gone for the more rounded one. Only in the first term, but not regretting it.

GollyMissMolly · 18/10/2010 15:57

Don't want to give too much away but the options are the most academic boys school you can think of versus the most famous (apparently) boys school you can think of! Lol!

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snorkie · 18/10/2010 16:28

Grin Not the schools we were choosing between then!

Congrats to your son. Remember you will never know how things would have turned out if you'd made the other choice. The 60% less does sound very tempting though (the difference for us was much less), and you are probably right that he will do well in either school.

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