My dd is as stubborn as a mule...

[nemofish]

She is 4 and in reception.

She is a bright girl. She is very 'resistant' to learning, she can write her name, but will only do it if she feels like it, which is fair enough.

But anything 'educational' that is asked of her, she will not do. She has some 'homework' which consists of recognising the letter 'y' and colouring in a selection of things that are yellow.

Will she do it? Will she buggery. She insists that she will colour in any colour, other than yellow.

I know it's just a little thing, but I am concerned that if this pointless stubborness continues, she isn't going to learn anything, and by the time she 'gives in,' she will be way, way behind.

How can I break her spirit talk her round / explain it to her? I have done the speech about showing her teachers that she knows her colours and the benefits of learning etc.

I would just ignore it for a while. My youngest DS won't do anything for me at all. Yet at school he's a different kid and is very responsive.

So if it's just at home, but fine at school, absolutely leave it. If she doesn't do her homework, don't worry about it. That's school's problem not yours (seeing as she's only 4). Forcing it is only going to make it worse.

There was an interesting thread about kid not wanting to read on the primary board a week or so ago. Everyone advised the OP to stop forcing him to read. A week later OP reports back that since she stopped making him read - he's now started choosing to read.

If she is also stubborn in class, than an expereinced teacher will be able to get the most out of her. But either way, it is really up to the teacher to get her to do work at school.

Not doing anything at all when you are 4 is totally not going to hurt or do any long term damage. Nor does it mean she'll be the same when she's 5 or 15.

Offer rewards. Yes, you can watch some television but can you just do this colouring in first.

Or try the 'I bet you can't find a yellow pen and there's no way that you can find all the ys on this paper. Oh I can't believe it you've done it' technique. That always works a treat.

Or involve toys either can you show teddy how to do it? Or give teddy the pencil and let him do it.

The main thing is to make it fun. Absolutely no point giving a 4 year old a lecture on the benefits of learning.

And don't present it as homework, just give it to her as you would a bit of colouring in.
sounds to me like she's already picked up the message that homework isn't meant to be fun plus you're giving her more attention for not doing it.

Yes I don't think forcing the issue is the way to go - she is very strong willed and I'm not sure I want to discourage that.

Dh thinks I am being 'soft' as I would just leave it and let her come around in her own time. However I think he is using me as an excuse for not pushing it! As he is a closet sofie too - he just doesn't want to let his daughter down.

I am doing 2 courses this year - it may be very handy for her to see Mummy doing homework...

I would probably try to trick her into doing something different, and maybe more creative. "And whatever you do, don't draw purple flowers on mummy's nice bit of paper."

She's 4 - give her a break. It is quite likely that by the time she comes home from school she just wants to put the whole thing behind her and do normal home stuff like she has until now. If she has just started in reception she is still in the settling in stage - the majority of kids come to it in their own time. There is a LONG way to go with her education so I would really try not to label her reluctance to do homework as "stubborn" at this stage - it really isn't worth starting a battle over a 4 year old about colouring in!

Well she has become quite taken with the idea of writing her own name, and is doing very well and practising lots!

She has done her homework with Dh's encouragement, when she had finished and Dh said 'well done LittleNemofish, that's really great work' she burst into tears!

I think she just wants to be able to do everything, perfectly, right now - so when we praise her normal, 4 year old efforts - she feels like she has let us down?! Bless her cotton socks.

She has watched me do my homework quite a bit and we have bought her a pink light up puppy soft toy for doing so well and school and settling in.