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Original poster

Rewarding good grades

14 replies

stenogirl · 08/09/2010 18:55

We need some help.

My niece didn't achieve the grades she was supposed to this year. She is now in her third year of secondary school.

As her auntie, I have agreed with my niece that I will draw up a contract and reward next year's grades with a certain amount of money. The better she does the more money she will earn. Said niece is very excited about this!

But I don't know if there is a going rate? Obviously, we don't want to hand over lots of cash if she does okay or the same as this year. Would love to hear from any mumsnetters have done this with their children. Thanks :)

OP posts:

annh · 08/09/2010 19:54

How do her parents feel about this??

MaureenMLove · 08/09/2010 19:59

Personally, a pat on the back and a 'bigging up' of how fabulously she's doing would be enough reward, imho.

So, she's just started yr9, I assume? How much will you have to weigh out by the time she gets to GCSE's and A Levels?

Sorry - misery guts here, who believes that getting the grades is their job!

Very generous of you though, you must be a fab auntie to have!

DandyDan · 08/09/2010 20:00

My daughter's best friend was told by her parents she would get £50 for every A* she got at GCSE.

Both my daughter and I were unimpressed with the whole notion. Even if we had the money, we wouldn't give rewards for good grades.

Also, her parents should be informed about this.

MaureenMLove · 08/09/2010 20:23

See, this is one of the reasons I don't subscribe to monetary rewards! DD is predicted A grades and she's doing 14 GCSE's fgs! I'll be brassic!

She can have a bunch of flowers, a card and maybe a family day out and like it!

Original poster

stenogirl · 08/09/2010 20:39

Her parents know about my idea.
They're just worried and don't know how to motivate her. Her mum was cross at the time and asked her why she hadn't done as well as expected. No answers from niece.

When I spoke to niece about it, she was like oh mum shouted at me.

OP posts:

MaureenMLove · 08/09/2010 20:51

That's an awful lot of pressure to put on yr 8 results tbh. In my experience, Yr8 is a tricky year. They've done the 'I'm brand new' in yr7 and they're not the newbees anymore, so in many respects, they get a bit cocky.

Are the parents putting too much pressure on her, do you think? Were her grades that bad? I'm not suprised she said, 'oh, she just shouted at me.' She's 13, I guess!

(Sorry, this is turning into a totally different kind of thread! )

annh · 08/09/2010 21:00

When you say she didn't do as well as she was supposed to - was that according to her predicted levels or to how her parents felt she should have done? Did she really not work or is she actually working to the best of her ability? I think her parents should try speaking to the school first before throwing money at the problem. I know this is a well-intentioned scheme but it just seems wrong somehow - or at least, a bit premature.

Hulababy · 08/09/2010 21:03

I would be more likely to reward effort rather than attainment grades.

But TBH I don't really like the idea of monetary rewards of applying oneself at school, although I can see why someone might resort to it in desperation.

pippop1 · 08/09/2010 21:06

I reward my kids for trying their best in exams. This would involve me observing lots of revision, sensible bedtimes, asking me to test them and getting homework in on time.

I give rewards before results but after exams. Usually an item or day out that they've mentioned.

BelligerentGhoul · 08/09/2010 21:14

I don't agree with the 'Cash for grades' thing tbh and like it even less when used as a bribe which the child expects, rather than an unexpected reward after the hard work.

My dd1 just did really well in her Yr 10 exams, so we are paying for her to see a band. But there is no way we would have gone with the '10 squid per A*' (or whatever) line.

DD2 (end of Yr 8) got a 100% in an exam and we bought her a book.

Ingles2 · 08/09/2010 21:14

I'm giving ds1 £50 towards an ipod touch for his 11+ work this summer.
However, that is for all the effort and practice he has put in, without complaint and not for the result.
and he isn't expecting it...
I think you might be in a difficult position though,
teenagers seem to think nothing of £50 these days, you might have to hand out a fair whack to interest her.
How about suggesting a day out instead?

Original poster

stenogirl · 08/09/2010 21:29

Thanks for your replies.
Her grades weren't as good as teachers predicted.
I will talk some more with my sister.
I'm not a parent (yet) so may be on the wrong track.

Niece doesn't get much pocket money so is motivated by money. She does jobs for me to earn cash and/or lunches out. That's why I thought it might work.
Maybe just reward her if she reaches teachers' expectations, not a fiver for individual grades. I was thinking of bringing her on holiday, but I'll have a baby by then so might not be the same as other hols we've been on.
Thanks for suggestions

OP posts:

MaureenMLove · 08/09/2010 21:38

To be honest, as long as she's a good girl, with good parental guidance, she will be absolutely fine. If she's got any sense, the grades she got, will give her a wake up call and she'll pull her socks up this year. Her parents getting on her case in yr8, will not help though.

Fair play to you though as auntie, for caring and trying to help the cause.

mumeeee · 08/09/2010 23:21

Sorry I don't think rewarding good grades is a good idea. It puts a lot of pressure ion the young person. DH and I reward for effrot and we don't shoat if they don't get the grades we expected. DD3 is dyspraxic and although when she took her GCSE's she did try very hard she got mainly D's and E's and only one C, But we were still pleased.

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