buyer said they haven't received - I have proof of postage - what do I do?

[plantwoman]

I sold an outfit on ebay 2 weeks ago. The buyer was off with me from the start - emailing 2 days after the auction wanting to know where the item was. (I posted it 1 day after the auction finished)
Within a week she still hadn't received the item and basically sent me an email written in capitals ordering me to go to my local post office to 'sort this out'.
I asked in the post office next time I was in there and they said an item wasn't classed as lost until 2 weeks after posting (which is today). They gave me a form to fill in if it hadn't turned up.
I asked the buyer to contact me if it hadn't turned up by today.
She has just emailed me saying it hasn't come and she is going to set up a dispute in paypal unless I refund her straight away.
As far as I am concerned her 'dispute' is with the post office. I am happy to pursue a claim (I have proof of postage), but would rather refund her when I get the claim back from the post office, otherwise I will be out of pocket.
I have had buyers claim before that item's haven't turned up and whilst I can prove i sent it, I don't have proof that she hasn't received it.
Also she has been so rude that she has got my back up quite frankly - what's the correct thing to do?
Thanks

Refund her & claim compensation from RMail. Yes she sounds like a prat & you will be out of pocket briefly; at least RM accepted my claim & paid me back pretty quickly. One of the perils of being a seller, I'm afraid!!

Thanks - yes after having time to feel slightly less annoyed about it - i think I will just refund her and hope I never have to do business with her again.
Although am tempted to make some comment about her rude and agressive manner!!!

I think that you can block named individuals from bidding on future auctions. Look into it, maybe?

I'd be tempted to do the following (if you haven't already refunded her -
send her a message along the lines of " I have just managed to track your item and it appears to have been delivered. I hope you are now in possession of it. If you are not could you possibly check with your neighbours in case they signed for it for you, or check with your local sorting office. Please get back to me as I can also check with your local sorting office also and depending on the outcome I can claim from the Royal Mail, which will simply involve you have to sign a form from them stating that you didn't receive it"

Due to the fact she was on the case from the start I have a feeling she does this a lot. If she has the item she may well reply saying"you can't have tracked it because it doesn't have a recorded delivery label on it" - then you have this proof for paypal
If she still proceeds with a dispute, then simply refund her.
I find that sending the above message makes items magically appear

I think cantsupinate is right, you are the one who has to turn yo RM for compensation as you are the one with the proof of posting. She has not got anything to show them to make her claim valid. Very ennoying for you though.

Refund her then leave her capital letter positive f/b (you can't leave her negative) saying you refunded her after her hassling you like a loon.

She sounds a typical tryer-onner.

sixlostmonkeys, Dh recieved similar message from a seller. It still took another 8 weeks for me to get my birtday present though, even after seller supposidly had confirmation that it had been delivered. It does sometimes happen that people do not recieve their goods and trying to fob them off making up it is their job/responsability to chase the goods is not good enough.

She sounds like she is trying it on.BUT If I had an email like that sixlostmonkeys, I would ask for the tracking details to track it myself.
Doubtful she will though after her attitude and eagerness so early on. Report her for threaening behavious too.

DH has just had this becuase someone bought an item for 99p and sent a blunt message saying they are arranging a courier (it was pick up only). Dh has said he will refund her as it is pick up only, she has gone beserk saying we have to offer all forms of postage options blah blah blah, and threatened to report him to ebay because he won't send it he has reported her anyway for threatening him over something that was her error.

I think she must think people have to book days off work to wait in for couriers - because ebay say so!!!

Anyway I digress, sorry

There are ways of saying/doing things me thinks!!

report her, block her and send recorded in future.

Thanks for your messages - I refunded her - simply because I couldn't be doing with the hassle.
She does have a high feedback score (no negatives) So I feel like I ought to believe her, although there's a 1st time for everything - so she could have been trying her luck.
It was just her general attitude.
I will look into blocking her from future purchases.
Are you still able to leave feedback if an item has been refunded and not received?
I had already told her that I hadn't sent it recorded delivery - it wasn't worth paying out for what is quite a low priced item.
Although I think in future I am going to state on my listing that if people want recorded delivery they have to state it as soon as they win and be charged accordingly.
what a lot of hassel to make a few quid from the kids clothes...
best go and fill in my royal mail claim form!

I am not saying that you should refuse to refund or to pass on the Compensation procedure to the buyer, I am saying that when you get a 'feeling' that the buyer is trying it on eg. 2 days after payment asking "where is it?" then it's worth calling their bluff. Sometime you don't just need the 'feeling' you just look at how many times they have claimed non-receipt via FB.

Everytime I have had this scenario I have had a swift reply of "Just to let you know my item has now arrived"
If they still say it hasn't arrived then you simply refund and claim from the RM. Adding the bit about tracking when you didn't actually send it tracked has been known on many occasions to prompt the buyer to let it slip that there was no rec del label on the packet - which means they have the packet!

Even without suspecting that the buyer is lying, a similar message, simply asking them to check with neighbours and the sorting office is often necessary. It is not trying to "fob them off". It makes sense to go through the simple procedures first, before refunding and claiming from RM. Items are 'often' at the neighbours or 'often' at the sorting office, even if the postie didn't leave a card. It's better for the buyer to be prompted to go and collect their item than for them to not get it at all.

Don't offer the buyer the option of recorded delivery. they know they don't need to pay for it because they are covered anyway with paypal. Recorded delivery if for the seller's benefit not the buyers, so, just add it to the p&p

Yes agree sixlostmokeys.

Jsut add 75p on to your p&P charges for recorded, do not offer the option - it is for your limited protection, not theirs!!

I had an item not arrive for ages that was sent reocrded, it also couldn't be tracked and i felt dodgy as anything emailing the seller!! It did actually arrive, rather late but posted when he said. I am sure he must have thought i was pulling a fast one, though at least it couldn't be tracked so obviously no been delivered anywhere!!

you live and learn - at least I had proof of postage this time. The 1st time it happened to me,not long after I started ebaying, I didn't and had to refund even though I'm sure the buyer had received the item.
Anyway - I will try the 'recorded delivery' tactic in future - it's a useful one to remember!

Just don't mention it at all, offer a price for 2nd class recorded postage and that's it. That's what I do.