Oh I am so cross, please help me to sit on my hands and not fly off at this idiot!!!!

[Flllightattendant]

I sold some antique quilts the other day - fair price, etc etc. So I sent an invoice and ticked the 'Ok I will accept paypal' box on the invoice.
I wondered why I hadn't received payment and then realised it was 'oending' through paypal - but had been sent to my old email address despite my having updated both paypal and ebay months and months ago.
So I can't claim the payment, so I sent a very apologetic and friendly email to the buyer asking him if he would mind awfully cancelling his payment and sending it to the correct address - I even sent a 'request' to make it easier for him. I kept saying sorry and felt bad about it.
He has replied with this:

Hello, very perplexed as when I went to pay for the items I was instructed that the seller prefers payment through paypal? As I have made payment in good faith can you please sort this out with Paypal direct as it all seem far too complicated to be honest.

I am really offended by this, as he seems to be implying I am up to no good, which is bollox as I am a very experienced seller and have great feedback - he has only a score of 51 so prob not very used to it and reckons it's a scam - either that or he just can't be arsed.
It's not as if I can claim his payment and scam him, is it? I have sent a very polite reply this morning saying how I feel slightly offended and would be happy to cancel the entire transaction and relist if he prefers, because I prefer my buyers to be happy and feel safe buying from me.

Sorry, I just needed to write this lot down before I go purple and explode. I have had to ring paypal this morning to make sure they can't help - I knew they couldn't but he is being such a dick, I've had to ask them to email me the details so I can forward it to him so he knows I'm not pulling a fast one.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

And I know that once he has paid, if he does, he will find a reason to be angsty and/or leave negative, which I would just prefer to avoid.

Sorry 'Pending' not 'oending!'

I wonder if he simply doesn't understnad how paypal works? He thinks he's paid.

I would also be confused by the situation if I were new to ebay (I've never used ebay and it seems more trouble then it's worth!)

How did he get your old email address? If he did this, other buyers will too ...

I wouldn't really blame him, it's not like he's paid to the wrong address to annoy you.

Do you not have access to the old address at all?

No access at all to the old address - i realise it wasn't his fault, I am not cross about that but just his attitude that it 'all seems too complicated tbh'.

I am trying really really hard to help him here, and he is talking as though I am a scammer.

Buda, yes it is confusing...I am winding up my ebay selling, but I wish people would accept my apologies when I offer them and not think I am up to no good.

What happened was ebay somehow reverted back to using my old address for payments - I don't know why they do this, it's ridiculous. I had no idea they were going to do it. I try to be a good seller and I'm sure he's a good buyer but I am just upset that he doesn't trust me.

Sorry that should say 'Belgo' not 'Buda'. oh dear it is me isn't it!!!!

Will bog off now and try to get something right. Thanks for replying...

I can understand where he is coming from a bit, because if you follow the pay now link you assume you are paying for the item you have bid on, and I see how to someone relatively new to ebay could think its a scam, if you send a request do you have the same buyer protection? I know if anyone buys from me they have £500 but if I invoice them off ebay they dont they only have whats in my account.

Have you worked out how ebay picked up the wrong paypal address? mine is set to automatically use one address but I frequently change it manually so it goes to one of the others dh and I have

I hope this reverting to old addies isn't another glitch like the one a few months ago. What an headache that was!

keep an eye on the boards to see if others mention the same problem

Thanks Helen

Paypal help centre seems to be saying that if you don't initially accept paypal on the listing, but add it later on the invoice as an option, it will take the address from the 'sell your item' form, which I seem to recall was coming up as my old email addy when I listed. I simply changed it every time on my paypal listings, to the correct one, but of course I didn't on this one as I wasn't planning to accept PP. I am still unsure why ebay were using it as default, as my email changed last summer IIRC and I have reset it everywhere I can think of.

I can understand why he is confused if he hasn't experienced this before, but I sent several emails last night very politely explaining why it had happened, apologising several times and so on - yes, he is not to blame but I feel so frustrated and a bit like I am banging my head on a wall.

I can't do anything more except cancel the sale or wait till his payment arrives. If he follows my instructions he can easily and safely cancel his payment, using the button next to the transaction in his pp account - it is still unclaimed and will be returned to him after 30 days anyway. I am going purple from trying to explain, really - I honestly was so very nice in my emails, took the whole responsibility etc etc.

Just waiting now to see what he says.

Thanks six, will do

aw flighty, i think id be suspicious too tbh.

dont take it personally - how can he possibly judge your character when he knows nothing about you? and how could you possibly care what his judgement is given thats the case?

tis just business.

we all know youre lovely

Oh BOTty I love you too

I thought he might be suss but there was no other way to handle it - I couldn't take the payment, so had to let him know. I've pointed him at the answer centre so he can see it happens all the time.

Ps Helen, I linked the request to the actual item, so it says payment for ebay item bla bla etc. I think that covers it - I will try and find out, good point about buyer protection though. Thanks.

It is for about £80 inc postage.

botty -

ellloo fa (waves back)

all I can say is that if the ebayer wont listen to you all you can do is wait for it be returned to him which it will be, tell him this is what you will do, there isnt anything more you can do its such a pain. Ebay is a pain at the moment so many idiots on there!!!!

Thanks Helen. I still haven't heard from him again...nice to know it isn't just me who has had enough of ebay! Once I have sold a few more things I will close my account I think. It is just such a flawed system. My nerves can't take it!

Thanks a lot for the advice btw!