Hoho, was a big stupid farce.
Ok, so I decided not to email her. I am a bad person.
I was working on the principle that it's easier to get forgiveness than permission, and there really is NOTHING else wrong with the damn thing. Naughty, I know, but I thought "she needs a mattress, I need it gone, if she complains, I'll refund her"
Anyway, she paid at 9am, which was fine. The courier turned up at about 11am, the smallest weediest bloke in christendom, (Think the guy off the Mr Muscle cleaning product ad, well he was BUFF compared to this guy) and stared (up) at the mattress propped against the wall.
I said "erm, have you got someone to help you carry it?" he shook his head. I said "I'm 8 months pregnant, I shouldn't really be carrying anything heavy" and he just looked at me blankly. Great start. I said "I'll get my shoes on..."
Then he announced that he couldn't take it with no address on. I pointed out that he must have the womans address as she ordered the courier service, not me. He said he didn't, just knew she was in Birmingham. Great. I wasn't even sure if I had her address on my ebay emails, and had nothing with which to attach the address to the mattress, not even duct tape or anything.
Then he added that I would have to "wrap it in something" Like what? "Clingfilm?" he suggested. I only use foil or sandwich bags, didn't even have a dustsheet or some binbags or anything that would work to wrap such a big thing in.
He started getting a bit impatient, said he couldn't take it, and no, he couldn't come back later. If he came back later she'd have to pay for the courier a second time. I didn't have her phone number to call her and ask what she wanted to do, so he left.
Nightmare! So I had to send her an email apologising but saying that I had no idea it would need wrapping, and this was why I'd said Local Pickup Only on the advert. Plus as my dp pointed out, she hadn't paid for packaging, so how was I to know?
In conclusion, I refunded her the money obviously, and I am still the owned of one oddly sized slightly threadbare but otherwise good mattress, taking up space in our livingroom.
I can't take it to the tip, it seems such a waste! I'm sure there's a shelter or organisation somewhere that could use it...