Is this just legal theft?

[sallyst123]

I have sold many things on ebay & never had a complaint or problem at all.
2 Wk ago I sold some of my daughters outgrown clothes. I sold a dress that was in perfect condition.
I get a reply from the buyer saying she had received dress but wasn't happy it didn't have a belt & there was a hole. (I know there wasn't a hole it was perfect when I sent it)
she point blank refused to send item back until she had her refund which she must have emailed me about 5 times for I following ebay a procedures said yes of course but the item has to be returned 1st
She point blank said no she wanted refund 1st.
I emailed ebay who sent me an email advising how to give a refund
So gave it to her.
Now 1 week later she is ignoring my requests for item to be sent back or put up proof of postage etc.
I'm fuming so I am left with no item & no money & the buyer gets it all. (Apparently they will investigate the buyer & if there is a fault found they will take action on her account, but I won't know if that happens or not)
It just seems to me like ebay are saying it's ok to steal from others & they are letting people get away with it.
I'm so cross right now. It's not about getting my money back now it's the whole principle of it all.

If it was a couple of hundred pounds games console instead of a dress, would you let it drop?

It's theft. You have her address. Explain she needs to return the item else you'll be giving her address to the police as theft. Personally, I'd even go so far as to seek out her Facebook profile to reveal her work's name and suggest I'd report her activity to her workplace too. It all sounds 'vindictive', but she has stolen from you. She shouldn't be allowed to get away with it.

The police won't do a thing of course, it's not their line of work, but the threat might be enough to make the buyer return the dress.

If this ruse works with everything she buys off eBay, she's onto a nice little earner there. But as others have said, any sellers who warn of her activity in feedback they leave for her, will have it removed within 48 hours anyway as it breaches the 'leaving a negative statement within a positive feedback' policy.

That is terrible advice - how is threatening a buyer going to resolve anything. Just plain nasty.

Twistleton. OP is a victim of theft. The buyer has deliberately scammed them. Hopefully the buyer doesn't know the police aren't actually interested (unless they've already received lots of reports about the same buyer) and the threat of report should be enough to have them returning the item.

It's not 'nasty'. It's a viable course of action.

no - the op made a mistake and refunded before the buyer sent it back. To call it theft is ridiculous and to bully and try and put fear into a buyer is just horrid.