Buyer hasn't paid, now doesn't want it [hmm]

[ThePrincessRoyalFiggyrolls]

I put on quite a high value item on my ebay and was delighted when it was sold for collection only. The highest bidder didn't respond to my initial invoice and email with regards to how/when they wanted to come and pick up the item. So I send another one 2 days later - in the meantime I discover that they live over 2.5hours away - however my dh did say that for a bargain he would do that sort of mileage . So yesterday I still hear nothing and send a further email (all by the way very politely worded!) to say that if I hear nothing before 4.30 today I would have to open an unpaid case under ebay policy as I had heard nothing from them whatsoever. I get a rather terse email in response saying they don't want it any more. Fucking brilliant. Now they won't respond to the cancellation I have put through so I have been charged by ebay for the 10% sale price, if they contest this what do I do, if they don't respond can I relist anyway as they have confirmed they don't want it, do I have to second chance it or can I just relist it and will ebay return the money to my account?

Sorry - just 1st time its happened to me!

(Oh and can they put feedback for something they decided they didn't want before they had paid for it?)

no - open a non paying bidder after 4 days. Then after 7 days I think you can close it. Buyer gets a non paying bidder strike and cannot leave you feedback. Once this has been done you can then relist for free or do a second chance offer. You will also get your final value fees back.

Don't do a cancellation - they should get a non paying strike for messing you around.

Ive had this a couple of times on collection items. One lady bid on a few of the same items from different sellers once they had all ended she just picked the ONE she wanted and everyone else had lost out. She didnt care in the slightest that she was mucking people about and left me (and however many other people) waiting for days so she could decide.
Also had a similar situation to yours too.
Its very frustrating isnt it?
I would do as fergoose says still open non paying bidder, that way they might think twice about doing it to someone else. And why should you pay fees on something you didnt sell due to someone elses fault?
Good luck.

Open non paying bidder dispute. "Doesn't want any more" is completely unacceptable, should have emailed you straight away!!

I genuinely think she doesn't care though as she has been a member since 2009 and has no feedback whatsoever, I should have smelt a rat instantly!