I'm in a serious panic due to overeating

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Yesterday I ate a bar of chocolate, a packet of crisps, and a sandwich. That's the most I've eaten in one day for ages, I usually just eat soup. I'm in full on sweating panic mode. I don't know why I ate so much, it was like I was possessed.
I'm seriously panicking, I don't generally do purging because if I do, my epilepsy meds will go. But seriously considering it.

That was yesterday
today is a new day
eat fresh and nutrient rich food today and get some fresh air

If you pause for a minute, I bet you feel like you have a lot more energy today than usual?

that is because you ate yesterday more than just soup

Please talk to your GP and ask for help with your eating disorder.

A bar of chocolate, bag of crisps and a sandwich is lunch for an average person. Why do you think this is overeating? You cannot be healthy on soup alone. Please tell this to your GP

Oh I have spoken to my GP, have an appointment with a Psychiatrist in a couple of weeks. I'm still freaking out though.
I appreciate all of the advice.

Because for me, this is extreme overeating. I don't eat chocolate or crisps usually. I don't eat most things usually

Oh op, I'm sorry your feeling this way. Anxiety is horrible.

It really is OK. I know it doesn't feel it, but I promise it is.

There's nothing wrong with what you ate. A small amount of things like crisps and chocolate will not hurt you. You are safe.

Try taking some slow deep breaths and look up "grounding" techniques to help stop the spiral.

Your taking great steps to get help by seeing a psychiatrist soon, really well done!

This feeling will pass I promise.

Thank you do much. Your post has been so helpful. I'm trying not to spiral, but it's in my nature. I feel like nothing will be okay ever again. Which is ludicrous, I know.

You’re allowed to eat, allowed to exist. It will all be okay. Right now you’re having a panic but it’ll pass. Things always pass.

I've just got a lot on me, at the moment. My Mum relies heavily upon me. I've got a very sick Aunt, and a very sick Uncle. My nephew needs a lot of support at the moment.
The only thing I can control is what I eat. And just not eating is so soothing.

It's a new day. Is it nice and sunny where you are? Hopefully you can get out for some fresh air or do something that brings you some joy.
Yesterday is in the past, don't give it another thought.

The fact you've posted in this section shows you are very aware your eating is disordered. I'm sure you know that objectively you didn't actually eat enough yesterday (you describe a typical lunch - but no breakfast or dinner). But your illness is telling you otherwise. Please do keep seeking medical help. You can get better.

Wishing you a peaceful day.

not eating is so soothing.

starving yourself gives you a kind of brain high, endorphins or adrenaline or something. It's chemical which is why it feels so good & addictive. The anxiety though is pure mental illness, it's what it feels like to be unwell. Everybody hates to be unwell, so of course you're seeking relief.

The illness could kill you & then you can't help anybody. If you want to keep being helpful to others then you MUST keep taking steps to break the behavioural addiction, asking for help, talking about all your challenges, getting to health care appointments, negotiating with health professionals about what can you do today to help reduce this mental illness. Finding peer support is helpful to many.

Take care. x

Not for you though, for the eating disorder that is currently residing in your head, and which needs yo be evicted for the sake of your health and happiness.

You did a good thing eating well, and the real you came here to get validation that calories are good for your body.

Thank you. The "me" me is still in utter panic though. She's the one who thinks I will never weigh as little as I should, will never be slim enough, nothing I can do will ever be enough. She's me, though I can also hear my mother's voice saying that because well, she's been saying it my whole life.

I'm still in an absolute flap about the food, but trying to calm myself down. It's not easy.

Hey, you did great.

One of the amazing things about growing up is that you get to tell (your mother) other adults that they are wrong, or that you disagree with them, or thanks for the helpful hints but you’ll take it from here now.

You can choose to be a bit rebellious, you were rebellious and nothing bad happened. In fact you made a tiny step towards recovery.

She's the one who thinks I will never weigh as little as I should, will never be slim enough, nothing I can do will ever be enough. I know how difficult it is to live with someone unpleasable- it’s hard. How about thinking about the BMI you would set for someone like you, but who is not actually you, be kind to them.
I also find it interesting that you use the word ‘slim’ slim enough. You are obviously way past slim, and the illness is using liar-words to force you to hurt yourself. If we changed the phrase to “anorexia says I can never look starved enough” would that be closer to the truth?

You have to nourish to flourish, my love. Sitting in the anxiety is so painful and it feels like you just want to step out of your own skin to get away from yourself and the crushing weight of everything you’re dealing with but I promise it gets easier with time. That voice in your head telling you it was wrong to eat and you don’t deserve it and it was too much will get quieter because you will give your body the energy it needs to fight it off ❤️ you’ve got this!