First GP appointment re DD12 eating disorder

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DD12 has been showing increasingly concerning signs of an eating disorder, body dysmorphia, overexercising, etc. She's been seeing a private counsellor about some other related issues but the counseller doesn't have a specialism in ED so we're at a point of speaking to the GP, finding out pathways to support, etc.

It feels like a real crunch meeting and I want to get it right. I'm intending to give a summary of DD’s obsessive thoughts and behaviours, dysmorphic views, etc. Fortunately, she's very open to speaking about it and she's also seeking relief from the intrusive thoughts about being fat, guilt around certain foods, and need to exercise.

Does anyone have any tips on how to approach the GP appointment later today, do’s and don’ts to get the best outcome?

No advice, but I'm sorry. Must be so hard.
Hope someone helpful comes along .

Hi OP, so I can’t speak from a parents perspective but I can speak from someone who had an ED around your daughters age.. firstly, the fact that your DD is aware and willing to speak about intrusive thoughts/her struggles is an amazing first step. I was the complete opposite and saw no wrong in what I done which made my grandparents life’s so much harder! Secondly, going into the appointment with what she will/is eating, how much weight she’s lost roughly and explaining what signs and symptoms is a great first step also. They will probably direct a lot of questions at your daughter, that’s completely normal! They just want to see what support would be best. For me, I was given some tablets and also was referred to psychotherapy. So I seen a psychologist every week which I found helped a lot. There is a lot to deal with so you have my deepest sympathy, but please try not to get frustrated with her during this process, sometimes it can be a very lengthy process of her “getting better” and it’s always best to be prepared for any set backs- I.e sometimes thinking she’s gone back to square 1. Try not to comment on her weight or anything like that as it can also be triggering! I’m more than happy for you to dm me if needed and I can explain more :)

It’s great your dd is talking about her eating issues. She will hopefully be referred to CAMHS ED service. Do you have a log of your dd’s weight? That would be useful. Or just explaining how she’s lost weight over x amount of time.

Don’t talk about calories in front of your dd it could lead her to restrict further if she’s alerted to how much she’s eating… that is unless she’s counting with a number in mind. Instead talk about the foods and quantities she’s eating, the guilt she feels over certain foods and over exercise.

The GP isn’t there to judge. You can’t really get this appointment wrong. If your dd is eating very little and has had rapid weight loss, the referral will be a lot faster than if she’s losing weight more slowly.

The compulsive exercise is linked to calorie deficit and is a survival mechanism left over from when we were a nomadic people.

Which area of the country are you in? I actually bypassed the GP and CAMHs and self referred my daughter to the Children and Adolescent Eating Disorder Unit; NW London. After a phone call they saw her 4 days later. Maybe just go in to your appointment and say firmly that you want your DD to be referred to s specialist unit. Many GPs like to do a 'wait and see', come back in 6 weeks etc. which in my opinion just wastes time.

The Beat eating disorders charity has some useful advice on their website for GP appointments and a leaflet you can print to take with you.

In our experience some GPs really understand EDs and others not at all so you are wise to be well prepared

Is she mirroring you. How's your relationship with food been and attitude towards overweight etx