ADHD adult child- eating tips???

[Whatabanana]

Hello, my daughter is away for university. She needs to increase her weight to get ADHD medication. Because her ADHD is unmedicated she doesn't eat (also has bad pmdd). Does anyone have experience of this or advice as to how I can help her to eat when she is not living at home?

You can’t. She has to want to make changes and be willing to accept your advice. Is this some thing she wants?

She is totally overwhelmed with negative thoughts

It must be very difficult to deal with this from a distance. I do t think there's just one single thing that can resolve it: Iit's something that probably needs a lot of support in different areas of her life. What support does she have at uni. Does she have good close friends or housemates? Is she supported by university welfare services? Is she coping academically as well as socially?

Sorry to ask so many questions. Does she understand that eating in the short term will bring longer term relief once the ADHD medication can be prescribed. ( What is this situation- why does she have to increase her weight in order to get meds??)

Can she talk honestly to you about her eating issues, without judgment or pressure ? Can you discuss any foods that she might be able to manage, and then send her a supermarket delivery?

ADHD meds are usually appetite suppressants. If she’s not on her meds she should have a normal appetite.
It doesn’t sound like she’s coping on her own yet and I suggest she comes home.

How about Huel or something similar? No preparation needed and all she needs to do is drink it.

The only advice I can give (and it might not be that useful as it’s not what you asked) is that citalopram and other anti-anxiety meds can help relieve PMDD. It can be taken throughout the month or just during luteal phase. Although in the circs you describe the whole month might be best. Maybe getting in control of the overwhelming emotions first might help your dd get to a situation where she can start to work on the other issues. All the best to her. I hope things pick up. It’s good that she’s got support.

My ADHD DP (inattentive type) forgets to eat all the time, and can get very thin. He’s improved things by setting reminders on his phone and having huel in addition to the meals I cook him. He’s also good at getting a decent breakfast in before the day distracts him. Can you help her build a routine? Or are her issues more than just forgetting/getting distracted?

Thank you all for your suggestions, it's hard because she loses motivation so easily. Huel sounds like a good idea, I wish I had thought of it a bit earlier (she is getting weighed Tuesday and it doesn't sound like she's been eating enough). I will definitely recommend that going forward.

She has tried some anti depressants but didn't think they worked, and the pill made her worse. Someone told me a coil might be better?

I survived my youth on microwave meals. Arrange delivery of healthy ones, plenty on the market. Two minutes and she's good to go. Fruit, tubs of nuts, yoghurt, babybel cheese, anything that's no prep - it can be reasonably healthy.

I have ADHD and went through periods of severe executive dysfunction or just plain forgetting I was hungry. I think I went down to about seven stone at one point.

Huel is amazing, tastes decent and is nutritionally complete. If you go to a place like Grape Tree you can buy pre-mixed drinks for £3.50 each in a ton of different flavours and each one is 400 calories. It's probably not a good idea to be on a pure liquid diet but it's better than nothing and I don't think replacing one meal a day would do much harm.

You can also buy Huel in powder form but I don't recommend it as it has a horrible tendency to clump and she'll probably hate that if she's sensitive to texture. I bought some to try it out and ended up giving it to my housemate as it was so claggy and disgusting!

To avoid a pure liquid diet, I would also suggest she keeps some cereal bars in her room and maybe finds a takeaway restaurant she likes for the days when she can't prepare anything.

Also if she likes cheese, cheese has a lot of calories packed in and could be sprinkled over the top of any food she prepares.

My other thought is pretty unorthodox and not one I would recommend from a health perspective, but we ADHD people sometimes have to make sub-optimal decisions.

Original full fat Coke is high in energy (although a lot of that energy is sugar) and the caffeine content is used by a lot of ADHD people for self-medication.

It may be useful for her to have a few bottles of that on hand even if just for emergencies.

I find strong coffee can also help with executive regulation although I hate the taste of it!

Thank you, I really appreciate the first hand ADHD experience!!! Unfortunately she doesn't like cheese at all. I did set her up with some breakfast bars but she was worried about the expense going forward- I maybe need to send food parcels. She has definitely gone through a lot of dr pepper, trying to find healthier solutions though😬. When her mood drops I really don't know if she would eat even the easy options, but I will try again with suggestions.

Weirdly calcium can help with PMDD. So could she start the day with a Calcium & Vit D Gummy.

Full fat milk and butter instead of spread should help too