Body image & food battles. Sick of this.. when will it end?!

[NCforthisone12]

Long history of eating disorders since teens (bulimia, restrictive eating, binge eating)

I have come so far. I know that. I never restrict or over exercise anymore and RARELY binge although sometimes I do overeat.

But everyday it still feels like an internal battle.

Constantly assessing my body, always thinking about food. I'm 34 now and I just don't know if I'll ever be at a point where I don't think about it anymore.

I have a good figure I know that but I am SO self critical. And spend most days just feeling anxious that I've eaten too much.

My mind must be 90% food and body image thoughts. It's annoying. Every photo I rush to see "how thin do I look?!"

I'm over it :(

If you've struggled with food, do you believe there's such thing as 100% recovery? I'm just not sure I do..

Also just seem to be obsessed with eating.

I always want the next snack, the next meal.

I want to be able to forget about food.

If have looked into hypnosis... has anyone tried this?

Hi, I'm sorry I have no advice but wanted to reply as I have a similar experience to you - long history of disordered eating and now I guess I would say I'm in a 'controlled relapse'.

I am also obsessed with food and most of my thoughts are around what I'm eating next and just absolutely sick of the constant obsession around food. Recently I felt so over it all and I tried to reset my mind. Disconnect food from emotion/reward etc.

I do think recovery is somewhat possible. When I was pregnant and after having my DD I lost these ED thoughts for about 5 years. I suppose they cropped up occasionally but bigger and more important things were happening so I ignored them. But now I find it hard to imagine what it would be like to go back to normal thinking.

Re: hypnosis - I'd give it a go, why not! When I'm ready I'll probably try that and meditation.

It's hard. I completely resonate with your feeling of being sick of thinking about food, but unfortunately I have no good advice! I do know that when I'm busy at work I am encompassed with that and can suppress the thoughts for a while. Is there a project you can work on where you can get fully engrossed and give your mind a break from the food thoughts?