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Eating disorders

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Effect of adult ED on child

2 replies

Mum19971 · 12/08/2023 11:37

So I wanted some advice from others really about what to do in my situation.

I have a 4 year old and I’m with his dad, his dad has been loosing weight rapidly the last couple of years. He is 6ft and now down to 62kg. we don’t eat dinner together ever because myself and our child eats things like lasagna, pasta bake, a chicken meal, roast dinner (the usual) and he only eats salad etc. our child often comments that daddy only eats salad.

We are on holiday and he was hospitalised a few days ago and placed into intensive care because he’d been binge eating and vomiting so much that he blacked out and had a seizure because his potassium and sodium levels were so low. He is now back out of the hospital feeling better with a stitched up head. Up to this point I had suspicions he was possibly sick but wasn’t sure, and now I know that over the last few years he has had bulimia but has been vomiting several times a day for the last 6 months or so. I’d asked him before and he said I was crazy for thinking so, and I was totally unaware he was binge eating. He also admitted to lying about his weight (trying to make me think he was gaining weight when he was still losing it)

I’ve followed him around everywhere for the last two days of holiday ensuring he isn’t sick. But that isn’t sustainable. He won’t go to the doctors, he does already see a private therapist and has done for a few months. He said this is a wake up call and he’s better now but obviously it’s not that simple.

what do I do? Obviously I love and want to support him but ultimately we have a 4 year old and I don’t want him to be affected by all of this? I feel like I can keep him safer/happier on my own but how do you walk out on somebody with bulimia?!

thank you for all advice xx

OP posts:
Mum19971 · 13/08/2023 03:24

Bumping

OP posts:
Lexxxx · 13/08/2023 03:56

Hey. Poor you this sounds super scary.
i can’t offer huge advise but I think I would consider contacting beat. They are an eating disorder charity. They can probably advise you in the first instance. Tbh at this point I wouldn’t be to worried about your little one, when they are tiny it’s easy to pass things off. I’d probably concentrate at this point focus on your partner as they do sound pretty unwell.
I work in an eating disorder unit for young people and beat is always recommended by professionals.
I am not sure of your husbands back story obv and whether this is a recent thing or something more historic but I do think that at this point as he’s required hospital care then this is more than you can manage and i would contact the professionals and take it from there.
lots of luck to you it sounds like a horribly stressful situation to be in x

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