Please or to access all these features

Eating disorders

Mumsnet doesn't verify the qualifications of users. If you have medical concerns, please consult a healthcare professional.

Initial Assessment

3 replies

RedChinaShoes · 01/08/2023 10:07

I am just in the waiting room at CAMHS. DS16 has gone for his physical health assessment.

I'm just looking for a handhold. DS doesn't want me to have any involvement in the appointment other than that he has agreed for me to have my individual session with the clinician. There is such a conflict between being still responsible for this 16 year old child (I know he is a young adult but legally, he's still a child) and yet, he can see health practitioners without me and keep me completely in the dark. How can a parent effectively support if they don't know what is being advised or discussed? I feel at a total loss. I'm still hoping he will at least consent to sharing information. He just says it's his mental health and he wants to deal with it himself.

I am feeling all sorts of things and very emotional. I just keep thinking of all the ways I could have been a better mum and wishing that I could go back and do his life again. I feel like my relationship with him is so shallow and awkward now, that I don't know the real him and I'm unsure that it is recoverable.

I am sitting here trying not to cry. All the other mums here have gone in with their children.

OP posts:
notagainfml · 02/08/2023 22:26

How did it go OP? Offering a belated handhold. It's positive that he is opening the door for you even if just a little bit. Do you have support for yourself from anyone?

Threeyearsalready · 03/08/2023 07:33

And for what it's worth, I don't go in either but sit waiting in the car. It's difficult with 16 year olds especially as the interpretation/assessment of "informed consent" , capacity etc by camhs is a bit variable....

RedChinaShoes · 06/08/2023 19:27

Thanks for the replies - really grateful. They have accepted him for treatment so we have a second appt next week to discuss FBT and whether this can work for us as a family. I am allowed to come to this one.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page