Do you think I have an Eating Disorder?

[UsernameChangeES]

I have only just noticed how bad this has become recently.
I am extremely restrictive when I eat. I count every single calorie in anything I consume. The restricting has worsened to the point that now I will only have a few hundred calories in a day. I will suppress hunger and don’t let myself eat when I am hungry as my head tells me not to. I get so scared when it comes to eating ‘too many calories’. I was shaking earlier when I forced myself to eat something. I feel weak, and want to exercise but just feel unable. I am cold and I wear four layers but will still be freezing and so tired. I don’t want to be like this. I just can’t stop thinking about it 24/7.
I have contacted Beat and have an upcoming appointment with my Doctor. I was just wondering if anyone here thinks I have an Eating Disorder or can offer advice?
Thank you for any replies xx

Of course you do. As for advice, you've already booked an appointment so that's great.

Yes, of course you do.

Yes 💐

Do you really need to ask? Of course it's an eating disorder

Yes it does sound like you have an eating disorder, unfortunately I can’t offer much help but well done for realising it and seeking help, I imagine that’s one of the hardest parts. I hope you get the help you need ❤️

Yes please get some help

You do.
I’m glad you have booked to speak to the GP. I hope you can get some support to recover

Well done for contacting Beat and you doctor. You have insight, you can see that this is having a negative impact on you. Let them help you, it will be a long road ahead. I wish you all the best.

Thank you everyone, you are all so lovely.
I am so frightened of what my Doctor will say. I’m scared that I will be told to be an inpatient and made to gain weight like that. I have Type 1 Diabetes and something else so I’m really unsure of what will be said.

Diagnosis depends on what’s driving the restriction. You do most certainly need support, especially as a type 1 diabetic so it’s really good that you are seeing your doctor. You need bloods, ECG, obs and a referral for an assessment with your local eating disorder service. How’s your glucose/and your HbA1c?

But a diagnosis of disordered eating vs eating disorder is dependent on the thoughts that are driving the behaviours.
Do you have an intense fear of weight gain? A goal weight or clothes size? Fear foods? Are you using any compensatory behaviours? Any insulin manipulation? You may meet the criteria for T1DE diagnosis.

Community treatment is the first line approach. You’ll only need inpatient (acute hospital) if you’re at risk of physical compromise or inpatient (specialist unit) if community treatment is not successful or unable to meet your needs. Most patients can be managed in the community.
Good luck OP. I hope you get the help you need

@FunnyCradock My glucose levels vary and HbA1c is good I believe. I don’t manipulate my Insulin as I worry about Ketones. I have had Diabetic Ketoacidosis in the past and don’t want to go through that again.

I do have an intense fear of weight gain and also have fear foods. I will exercise to try and help me feel less guilty and rectify eating. I don’t vomit or use laxatives. I don’t have a weight goal or clothes size that I’m aiming for but I did, and reached it. I look at myself in the mirror and see nothing but flaws so lose weight to help correct them. If I eat it is very reluctantly and I have to work out the calories. I don’t like calories and I have guilt before and after eating. I think about repercussions before and how I shouldn’t eat or have eaten as I don’t deserve to.

@FunnyCradock My calorie intake reaches a few hundred a day. I do have a lot of anxiety away from eating as well. I don’t know why I started being so strict with myself. I just feel that I have to do it.

@UsernameChangeES based on your answers it’s likely you would be accepted by your local ED service. T1DE patients are placed on the priority pathway in my local area because of the increased risk of complications. It’s positive that you don’t manipulate your insulin & your diabetes seems well controlled, it means your focus on recovery can be on the ED cognitions from the beginning rather than managing your blood glucose.

As your food intake is low you are at risk of refeeding syndrome so you’ll need to be given a refeeding meal plan & likely be advised to buy or prescribed refeeding vitamins.

Can you self refer to your local ED service? In my area you can, it cuts out seeing the gp and is the quickest way in.

In the meantime, if you experience any chest pain, fainting, palpitations, oedema or just feel generally ‘not right’ please go to a&e. Take care of yourself.

Think of all your body has to do each day - it keeps you alive, and it needs a lot more calories than you are currently eating.

You are valuable and worthwhile. You deserve to be happy and to take pleasure in life.

I hope your appointment with Beat goes well, and you can find a way forward. 💐

Yes. Butbits good you are aware of it. Thats a step towards sorting it. You've done the right thing seeking help.,

Hi @UsernameChangeES Are you an adult?
If yes do you have any support from friends and family?
If yes, have you thought about taking someone with you to see the GP - for some extra support, if you feel that might help?

It’s really good you’ve contacted BEAT and posted here.
Whilst it’s clear you have disordered eating, the GP will refer you to a specialist team who can support you and help give you a bespoke plan to get well.

@FunnyCradock @Verbena17 I am an adult, I’m 32. I am going to be having my Mum with me. I do want to speak with my GP alone but would like to have her in the waiting area if I need her. I don’t know if she thinks I need this appointment really. I have spoken to her about my worries although I wasn’t able to say everything to her. So, you would say Disordered Eating rather than Eating Disorder?

@piedbeauty I know how much my body does for me. I just wish I could remember that when I am depriving it of food.
Thank you so much, I hope my appointment goes well too x

Yes, a huge problem. I'm currently on a 'healthy eating kick' and food takes up about 2% of my time.

Glad youre getting help.

I used the term disordered eating only because you do not yet have a diagnosis and I didn’t want to assume anything.