It's happening again

[StillMedusa]

My Eldest has battled anorexia since their teens. They are highly intelligent, anxious and on the autistic spectrum, and any big change in life is a trigger for ED.
They have been seriously unwell quite a few times (inpatient, tube fed, ED unit etc) but despite this has a professional career.. unfortunately one of the most stressful imaginable (but loves their vocation) They've been well for a good few years now and has good insight into their own mental health.

Out of the blue their partner has had an affair and left. Partner (they are married) has been the stay at home partner, not worked due to anxiety (but somehow well enough to go shag someone else) never contributed to the house, mortgage, anything, but now wants half of everything, including DCs pension etc.

The spiral of heartbreak and stress has sent them back into anorexia...and deteriorating rapidly.

I understand why, completely. But it's breaking my heart and this is awful to say, but I feel so exhausted by the mental stress. I care for my disabled youngest child, my grandchild, and work part time, and trying to support my eldest again , both from a distance and in person, juggling them all to try and be there for everyone.. it's breaking me.

Just HOW do I support without falling down a black hole myself please?

[Goodgrief82]

I think your main focus must be your GC

[Verbena17]

@StillMedusa oh gosh that’s so awful for your DC and such a lot to cope with for you, juggling all of your caring commitments.

For your eldest, whilst you’re obviously going to be there for them when they’re going through this, there are adult ED services who can also take the pressure off you, so it’s not only you taking it all on.

Have they already been to the GP - could the GP perhaps organise some counselling for your eldest and put things into action to monitor their health and weight regularly and if need be, arrange for any hospital care?

[SammyScrounge]

She may cope better than you think she will. She has been here before and was taught the techniques to pull through it all. I do so hope that will be true.

[PritiPatelsMaker]

How bloody awful for you and your DD.

How are you all getting on now? I'm hoping she's well enough to get a good Solicitor for the Financial Arrangement Order.